Thinking about ctb at church

[ronigail9]

Maybe behind the dumpster, or in a nook of a courtyard, lots of people aren't there at night and usually in the morning a clergyman individual may be the person to find me. They might have less nightmares than my family? I know based on my churches beliefs it would be handled well, that they would be very respectful.

The only other place I have would be at the playground maybe in an enclosed slide. But I would hate to be found by a child.

I could do it in my room, in my closet, but my husband would find me and be traumatized.

I could put the dressor in front of the door so there would be a barrier and a warning that they should call the authorities.

 

[Stick]

I definitely think that a playground is not a good idea. Are you able to afford a hotel? Some people send a delayed mail to police to notify them of their body location, so maybe you could ctb somewhere more isolated where no one could find you.
I think that of the four, your last idea is the best. Hopefully it's authorities who will see you first.

 

[ronigail9]

I have no money. There is a Native American Indian Reservation nearby where there is a big open field in a ditch but it's a six-seven mile walk or so and I don't know if anyone will see me. What shitty ways to die. I used to plan on doing it in my van, but we only have one vehicle so now my husband uses it

 

[Stick]

I have no money. There is a Native American Indian Reservation nearby where there is a big open field in a ditch but it's a six-seven mile walk or so and I don't know if anyone will see me. What shitty ways to die. I used to plan on doing it in my van, but we only have one vehicle so now my husband uses it

I'm sorry... in this situation, then, I think your dresser idea is best. To be extra safe, if you have internet, you can schedule a delayed email to send to the police. That way, they can hopefully be notified after you die but before your husband could find you. Best of luck

 

[tidalwxves]

Maybe behind the dumpster, or in a nook of a courtyard, lots of people aren't there at night and usually in the morning a clergyman individual may be the person to find me. They might have less nightmares than my family? I know based on my churches beliefs it would be handled well, that they would be very respectful.

The only other place I have would be at the playground maybe in an enclosed slide. But I would hate to be found by a child.

I could do it in my room, in my closet, but my husband would find me and be traumatized.

I could put the dressor in front of the door so there would be a barrier and a warning that they should call the authorities.

I really don't want to be judgemental, I understand you are in a lot of pain, but these are not good ideas. We have to be careful about the impact we have on others. A playground is absolutely unacceptable, there is no excuse to traumatize small children like that. I also think a church is a bad idea, they are not going to be less traumatized just because they believe in religion. There are ways to do this where the people that will find you are used to it and able to cope, but even that depends on the method used.

 

[timetofly]

Doing it at church is a fantastic idea! I've never thought about that.

 

[Ghost2211]

By the church sounds like a nice idea since you said they would handle it well and with respect. A playground sounds too risk as far as a child possibly finding you, and I can see why you don't want loved ones to find you. I hope you are able to find a place that feels comfortable and safe for you. I'm sorry it has come to this.