BipolarGuy
Enlightened
- Aug 6, 2020
- 1,456
Does anyone else ever feel that the universe is pushing them in a certain direction in life, as though things just seem to line up or happen in such a way to push you in a certain direction?
I don't mean thinking that there is literally somebody 'up there' conspiring against you, I mean that, somehow, things just line up so well that it feels as though the universe is pushing you in that direction...
I've heard people say to each other that
"The stars have lined up..."
"Doors have opened for you..."
"Somebody up there is taking care of things..."
Usually these types of sayings are reserved for positive situations, for instance starting a new career, getting a new job, getting pregnant, meeting a new partner, sale of a house going through...
But I feel that things have really 'conspired' to push me to bring harm to myself.
There have been serious overarching issues in my life for years: housing issues, financial problems, employment issues, etc.
But 'smaller' issues have presented themselves day to day, e.g. people who I thought were good friends or family being incredibly nasty and judgemental.
Now, something else has happened which is weird partly due to timing.
I have decided that I'd like to use sodium pentobarbital, but I quickly realised it may be out of my price range.
I then get a letter from HMRC indicating that I have a SIGNIFICANT tax refund owed to me. No it's not a scam of some kind, I've been in touch with HMRC.
So I will be able to afford it easily!
I have no idea whether there is a God, but I wonder why some people's lives are 'blessed' so incredibly positively whereas the only door that seems to open in the lives of others is one that gives them the opportunity to take their own life relatively peacefully.
I don't mean thinking that there is literally somebody 'up there' conspiring against you, I mean that, somehow, things just line up so well that it feels as though the universe is pushing you in that direction...
I've heard people say to each other that
"The stars have lined up..."
"Doors have opened for you..."
"Somebody up there is taking care of things..."
Usually these types of sayings are reserved for positive situations, for instance starting a new career, getting a new job, getting pregnant, meeting a new partner, sale of a house going through...
But I feel that things have really 'conspired' to push me to bring harm to myself.
There have been serious overarching issues in my life for years: housing issues, financial problems, employment issues, etc.
But 'smaller' issues have presented themselves day to day, e.g. people who I thought were good friends or family being incredibly nasty and judgemental.
Now, something else has happened which is weird partly due to timing.
I have decided that I'd like to use sodium pentobarbital, but I quickly realised it may be out of my price range.
I then get a letter from HMRC indicating that I have a SIGNIFICANT tax refund owed to me. No it's not a scam of some kind, I've been in touch with HMRC.
So I will be able to afford it easily!
I have no idea whether there is a God, but I wonder why some people's lives are 'blessed' so incredibly positively whereas the only door that seems to open in the lives of others is one that gives them the opportunity to take their own life relatively peacefully.
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