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Sk3le

Student
Oct 30, 2021
140
Not that will change anithing but maybe, just for tonight, i will feel a little better.
I mean someone that has no family or friends and live completely alone.

If there is someone like that, how do you face every fucking day in this life knowing that every problem, big or small, that affect you you will have to face it on your own?
 
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Reactions: Efilismislife, MeltedJello, Deleted member 8975 and 17 others
Snake of Eden

Snake of Eden

“Ye shall be as gods..🍎 🐍”
Jun 22, 2021
2,473
Thats a hard place to be in and I feel for you. I plan to take my own life before I am faced with such situation as I am not equipped to face the remainder of my life time fending for myself alone
 
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Reactions: patheticpartner, Rational man, Ruined my life and 2 others
Lifeispointless

Lifeispointless

Death is inevitable
Oct 29, 2021
18
I'm in the same situation as you and it's exactly why I plan on ctb tomorrow. I just recently lost everything I had and my life will never be the same.
 
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bed

bed

CTBed
Aug 24, 2019
919
I live with family but rarely speak with them. I could CTB right now and they most likely wouldn't find out for days.

I face every day by not doing anything because I'm paralyzed by anxiety.
 
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U

UnemployedMD

Member
Mar 18, 2021
73
I live in between hotels and my parents. I have a lot of resentment towards them though and being around them makes me feel ill most of the time so I am constantly looking for a reason to leave. So I may as well be alone. No friends, no family I speak to, no SO, and no one who would even notice or care if I just fell off the face of the Earth. I spend each day in a small room, barely eating and not leaving the building other than to smoke a cigarette a few times a day. The rest of the day is spent doing chores or activities I don't want to do, trying to find the motivation to take care of myself in some limited way (and always failing), or getting drunk. It's been like this for the greater part of a year now. The thing that really makes me want to ctb though is coming to the realization that I never had anyone in the first place and have been kidding myself that I haven't actually been alone my whole life.
 
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Reactions: Journeytoletgo, blueclover_., Joarga and 5 others
H

Hurt

Paragon
Nov 13, 2020
905
I dont live alone but I feel alone.
 
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Marktheghost

Marktheghost

Paragon
Feb 20, 2020
911
I'm completely alone.

I enjoy food. I think that's about as close as I've got to anything that makes life worth living. I don't know what else to say that's remotely likely to help.
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
42,570
Not completely alone, as I have a few family members, but I do not talk much and I spend pretty much all my time alone. Loneliness can be painful for many people, but I choose to be alone. People can be very tiring.
 
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Reactions: blueclover_., LonelyBrazilian, patheticpartner and 2 others
Scribble Fan

Scribble Fan

I'm out!
May 30, 2019
815
I'm not completely alone, I have 1 "friend" who I don't like very much but... it's something. Still end up feeling lonely as fuck all day though.
 
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Reactions: LonelyBrazilian, patheticpartner and Rational man
T

toforigivelife

Arcanist
Jul 5, 2021
493
I am in the same position.

You sound like you're in a lot of pain. A lot of pain, and I'm so sorry my friend.

I tend to feel that the fact those who I share DNA with, I cannot bring myself to use the word family in reference to these individuals, don't worry themselves about my crisis gives that much more freedom to leave this life.

For what it's worth I do relate to what you are going through.

Is it that no one is giving you love or that you can't receive love?

Sometimes clinical depression leaves us being unable to receive love.

Regardless of what the problem is, yes, I'm in the same boat and I'm so very, very sorry for your pain.
 
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Reactions: Cuppatea856, mediocre, LonelyBrazilian and 2 others
C

Cuppatea856

Member
May 27, 2020
60
Most of my family has died within the past 4 years. The only sibling I have left has Parkinson's. I have bipolar and it gets worse every year, My dog is dying and when she dies, I am going to ctb. I am only alive to take care of her. I am alone, she is the only thing that's kept me alive. She has taken good care of me, the least I can do is be here for her in her last days.
I have tried for so long to stay strong and I just cannot do it anymore.
 
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T

toforigivelife

Arcanist
Jul 5, 2021
493
Most of my family has died within the past 4 years. The only sibling I have left has Parkinson's. I have bipolar and it gets worse every year, My dog is dying and when she dies, I am going to ctb. I am only alive to take care of her. I am alone, she is the only thing that's kept me alive. She has taken good care of me, the least I can do is be here for her in her last days.
I have tried for so long to stay strong and I just cannot do it anymore.
I'm so sorry. So sorry.

Having bipolar disorder, I'm sure you've given this a lot of thought.

I'm sorry that your dog is sick, I'm sorry for your dog's suffering. But they'll be in a better place soon. I wish I could go with you to the vet when the time comes. We on SS will be with you and your dog in spirit.

I wish you peace and blessings in whatever decision you come to. If you decide to end your suffering I wish a safe and peaceful journey, a journey that will bring you the peace, healing and love that you need.

All my best to you, all my best to you and your dog, my friend.
 
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LonelyBrazilian

LonelyBrazilian

Just a boring guy.
Oct 21, 2021
180
I feel you. I live with my parents but I don't talk to them much, my only company is my dog. Living each day for me is a hard chore.
 
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Enabran255

Enabran255

Numbed
Oct 2, 2019
101
Completely alone? I'm not sure if my situation fits the definition 100% but my effective day to day existence feels like I am.

My dad died over twenty years ago. My mom, I've never had a healthy relationship with, and it became extremely toxic in the aftermath of bullying in college which thoroughly destroyed my life. My mom now has problems with memory loss, and the experience is basically like her life and the person I've known her as is slowly fading. My brother these days is way too busy with his life to have time to talk to me at all, and we haven't gotten along very well.

I have no relatives I talk to anymore thanks mostly to bitter grudges and infighting on both sides, which led to my immediate family being cut out and excluded. At this point, all my grandparents and most of my aunts and uncles are dead. There was an aunt I was close with during my time in college, but the bullying I suffered then destroyed my relationship with her too. She died a few years ago and I never even found out she was sick until six months after her death, as she hated my mom that much and swore everyone to secrecy to keep us out of the loop.

I have no friends and live by myself. I have no prayer of ever finding romance at this point, not for lack of trying. Every time I've made any progress the universe is always there to throw increasingly preposterous things in the works to sabotage it. The last time I had a social life in person was in my college days, but I lost them all from vicious bullying.

My efforts at making new friends or finding someone to date are only good for accruing the critical mass of suicide fuel I require for the inevitable day when I decide to succumb to that ultimate decision of despair. Every time I start talking to someone new who shares my interests, be it a potential friend or girlfriend, they'll always ghost me within a few weeks.

My romantic history is littered with brutal failures and "if onlys." In my entire life I've never been able to progress far enough to official boyfriend-girlfriend status. There is always something that will materialize to scuttle it.
 
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T

tardis

Member
Sep 7, 2019
73
The only things that have helped me in the past:

1. Focus on hobbies. For me that's programming, and reading difficult academic books (mostly math books).

2. Exercise.

3. Trying to find semi-social things to do like eating at restaurants, or going to movies even if it's alone.

The last two I haven't been able to do due to covid and injuries, and that made me so depressed that I haven't been able to do the first either. So I'm really struggling with this stuff at the moment, but if you can do it, it definitely helps.

I think therapy could help me too, but it's impossible to find a therapist where I am.

Forums like this can be useful or harmful. It's important not to develop parasocial relationships imo and maintain some emotional distance from strangers on the internet. It can help to train you social muscles and talk to people online though.
 
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eternalmelancholy

eternalmelancholy

waiting for the bus
Mar 24, 2021
1,169
Not that will change anithing but maybe, just for tonight, i will feel a little better.
I mean someone that has no family or friends and live completely alone.

If there is someone like that, how do you face every fucking day in this life knowing that every problem, big or small, that affect you you will have to face it on your own?

It is a haunting feeling knowing you are completely alone in this world. People with family and friends will never understand. My mental state is starting to deteriorate because of it. I have legitimately no reason to live but I still haven't found the courage.

This isn't living. This is slow suicide.
 
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Reactions: Cuppatea856, Sk3le, Journeytoletgo and 4 others
C

Cuppatea856

Member
May 27, 2020
60
I'm so sorry. So sorry.

Having bipolar disorder, I'm sure you've given this a lot of thought.

I'm sorry that your dog is sick, I'm sorry for your dog's suffering. But they'll be in a better place soon. I wish I could go with you to the vet when the time comes. We on SS will be with you and your dog in spirit.

I wish you peace and blessings in whatever decision you come to. If you decide to end your suffering I wish a safe and peaceful journey, a journey that will bring you the peace, healing and love that you need.

All my best to you, all my best to you and your dog, my friend.
what a kind reply. I just wanted you to know, your words made me feel a little less alone. Thank you.
 
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T

toforigivelife

Arcanist
Jul 5, 2021
493
what a kind reply. I just wanted you to know, your words made me feel a little less alone. Thank you.
I'm glad that I could make you feel a little better.

Wish I could make you feel one hundred percent better.

My sister suffered with bipolar disorder. She ended her life in 2019. I know bipolar disorder, like clinical depression, can be fatal.

I'm sorry that you are going through what you're going through with your dog, I'm sorry that you're alone with this.

But at least people like you and me understand that it is kinder to give relief to someone who is suffering rather than think that blindly keeping a suffering living being alive is somehow kinder.

I will continue to truly hope that things get better for you.

But I also respect your right to judge your own quality of life. Especially when you are contending with something as merciless as bipolar disorder.

Reach out any time you want to. I can't guarantee my availability, but I check SS fairly regularly.

All my best to you.
 
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