I had drug induced psychosis. Got injected with Invega/Paliperidone and it's been 8 months and i know i will never be the same person i was before.
It had taken so much away from me. I never thought I'd be on a website searching up ways to end my life.
I dont think I have the courage to go through with suicide but I am absolutely stuck in life going no where fast. I can't talk to my friends because what do you say? I think the best way put is suicide? I will talk to a therapist but only to make others happy. There is nothing a therapist can do to alleviate the damage that has been done to my brain and psyche from anti psychotic medications.
I am so fortunate to have a father that is looking after me. Without him though I would be completely fucked. What happens when he's gone? He can't look after me forever and I am barely functioning as a human.
I am beyond depressed when I seriously think about killing myself i just can't fathom how ill muster the courage to do it.
But im a broken person. I am so lost. I am so sad I am so scared and I d9nt know how to talk to anyone because of guilt shame and embarrassment and also the fact I'm not the same person I used to be.
I have no enthusiasm for anything. I am not helping myself I just want the world to dissapear.
I got bullied horribly in the workplace just to end up killing myself on drugs and alcohol. To the point that my life is now completely fucked. The only way put for me is death and I'm to much of a pussy I always fucking have been. How do people find the strength to go through with it. I don't understand.
I'm beyond broken and I am so scared of the future.
Just a vent.
It had taken so much away from me. I never thought I'd be on a website searching up ways to end my life.
I dont think I have the courage to go through with suicide but I am absolutely stuck in life going no where fast. I can't talk to my friends because what do you say? I think the best way put is suicide? I will talk to a therapist but only to make others happy. There is nothing a therapist can do to alleviate the damage that has been done to my brain and psyche from anti psychotic medications.
I am so fortunate to have a father that is looking after me. Without him though I would be completely fucked. What happens when he's gone? He can't look after me forever and I am barely functioning as a human.
I am beyond depressed when I seriously think about killing myself i just can't fathom how ill muster the courage to do it.
But im a broken person. I am so lost. I am so sad I am so scared and I d9nt know how to talk to anyone because of guilt shame and embarrassment and also the fact I'm not the same person I used to be.
I have no enthusiasm for anything. I am not helping myself I just want the world to dissapear.
I got bullied horribly in the workplace just to end up killing myself on drugs and alcohol. To the point that my life is now completely fucked. The only way put for me is death and I'm to much of a pussy I always fucking have been. How do people find the strength to go through with it. I don't understand.
I'm beyond broken and I am so scared of the future.
Just a vent.
