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VampQueen

VampQueen

Forklift Certified
Feb 6, 2024
114
I honestly need the weekend to be over already. I can't take It anymore. On the edge, hanging on with 1 finger.

I got intona fight with my brother today. He kept fucking with my cat and I told him to stop. He got bit, no blood draw. Then proceeds to stuck his shoes in my cat's face. I yelled at him to stop fucking with the cat because I already told him to stop 2 other times.

He's get pissy and says "see this is I don't fuck with you." Then says something under his breath but I couldn't hear it.

I also bought medical tape. Expecting me to use it to bandage myself at one point if I feel the need to SH. Fuck man. I just want to me normal. I want to have a normal brain with a normal, balanced amouth of chemicals

I told my mom twice that I think I may need to go the the psychward but nothing. Refuses to entertain me at all. Not even "well if you think you should then maybe it'll help." Or even "tell me what's wrong?" I LITERALLY TOLD HER I WAS READING A BOOK ABOUT SUICIDE AND NO REACTION OTHER THAN MY THIS
"What ate you reading?"
"A book about suicide?"
"Do you think that's a good idea?"
"Well it'll either help me or push me to suicide."
And then silence afterwards, nothing. Just continues to lick on her popsicle like a dog with peanut butter stuck on the roof of its mouth. I feel so numb writing this, my brain has gone tingly
 
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silentcicada

silentcicada

Silhouettes on the ceiling
Aug 2, 2023
119
I'm sorry, I truly think life would be more bearable if people like us had some support from our families. I've been in therapy almost my entire life but still, it can't fix the people around me.
 
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bandoscii

bandoscii

Member
Jun 29, 2024
17
I'm so sorry :( Sending hugs 🫂
 
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BojackHorseman

BojackHorseman

The View From Halfway Down
Feb 8, 2023
126
I'm so sorry your going through that with such an unsupportive family. That has to make things so much worse, especially with the cat, that would make me absolutely livid with rage. I hope things get better for you, your family might not understand but we do here.
 
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VampQueen

VampQueen

Forklift Certified
Feb 6, 2024
114
I'm so sorry your going through that with such an unsupportive family. That has to make things so much worse, especially with the cat, that would make me absolutely livid with rage. I hope things get better for you, your family might not understand but we do here.
Yeah. My cat is my best friend. I've had him through everything. I got him a year later after my first psychward admitting. He'll be 5 later this year
 
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ferrie

ferrie

she/they
May 19, 2024
401
It's always so heartbreaking to see people's families not even attempting to do anything when they admit that they're suicidal bc I've been in that same position with my mom. People who bother animals for no reason are so annoying too. At least you have your cat with you though! And your cat sticks up for himself enough to bite lol. I hope your consultation goes well!!
 
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VampQueen

VampQueen

Forklift Certified
Feb 6, 2024
114
It's always so heartbreaking to see people's families not even attempting to do anything when they admit that they're suicidal bc I've been in that same position with my mom. People who bother animals for no reason are so annoying too. At least you have your cat with you though! And your cat sticks up for himself enough to bite lol. I hope your consultation goes well!!
If my cat bites you after I tell you to stop messing with him - and he clearly doesn't want to be messed with - and your still messing with him, you deserve to get bit. I take that as self defense and self defense should never be punished.
 
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ferrie

ferrie

she/they
May 19, 2024
401
If my cat bites you after I tell you to stop messing with him - and he clearly doesn't want to be messed with - and your still messing with him, you deserve to get bit. I take that as self defense and self defense should never be punished.
I take the same philosophy with my cat. New people get warned that she's not shy about using her claws. If they don't listen & crowd her, that's on them when they get scratcher. Pets have boundaries too!
 
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BojackHorseman

BojackHorseman

The View From Halfway Down
Feb 8, 2023
126
Yeah. My cat is my best friend. I've had him through everything. I got him a year later after my first psychward admitting. He'll be 5 later this year
I understand what that's like, the bond that you can forge through hardship like that. I lost my precious pup after 15 years together back in January. I'd had her since I was 15 and lived on the farm with my abusive father. She was my sole reason for existing, because of course I couldn't abandon her with him. I got married and we left that awful place together, but that bond we shared going through all that is one I don't think will ever be replicated again. Loosing her has been the hardest thing I've ever endured. Spend every moment you can with your best friend, give him lots of love ❤️
 
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VampQueen

VampQueen

Forklift Certified
Feb 6, 2024
114
I understand what that's like, the bond that you can forge through hardship like that. I lost my precious pup after 15 years together back in January. I'd had her since I was 15 and lived on the farm with my abusive father. She was my sole reason for existing, because of course I couldn't abandon her with him. I got married and we left that awful place together, but that bond we shared going through all that is one I don't think will ever be replicated again. Loosing her has been the hardest thing I've ever endured. Spend every moment you can with your best friend, give her lots of love ❤️
I am sorry for your loss, but i am happy that you had someone there for you.❤️

As for my lil dude. He's something else, lol. He very food motivated and sometimes I'll give him a little something for the fuck of it. He is a little clingy. He'll wait outside the bathroom for me, come say "hi" to me when I'm at a desk, and follow me into the kitchen. He can tell when I'm not feeling the best because he'll just lay next to me. His presence alone is soothing to me.
 
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