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Goukan「強姦」

Goukan「強姦」

Member
May 4, 2023
15
I'm new here so I'm not totally familiar with the mentally of this forum. I had some I guess questionement about the morality of it and I hope I can express them without any backlash.

How much/long some of you guys who struggle ONLY from mental illness have tried to get help before accepting suicide.

I do think more "positively" of suicide then any mainstream media. I do not understand the extreme pressure to avoid the act of suicide without treating what lead to someone wanting to die so badly. Only I have been told my whole life that I shouldn't die, that things will get better. I have been feeded these "inspiration porn" videos about people who wanted to die but LOOK AT THEM NOW! They are fully recovered now living a happy life in the suburbs. When I know the cruel reality for alot of us is a really dysfunctional life filled with sadness.

Only when is it valid to call it quits? I am 18 still a fairly young human. I have went trought EVERY pediatric mental mental resources in my region. I had suffer great trauma and abuse from staff and it left me feeling worst. But even all that I don't think my suicide would justified yet. I plan on sticking around until my late 20s.

Only I see alot of depressed people wanting to end it all at 20yrs old. When I was 14-15 I was unmedicated and I was truthly close to ending it only after a hellish trial and error of shitty psychiatric medication I did find a middle ground. If I had ended it back then would it have been justified when there was an awnser for my suffering even if that relief wasn't permanent?


I just wonder how hard some one the people here that are ONLY suffering from mental health problem have tried to get help before accepting suicide. My question does sound mean but trust me there is no judgmental intention behind it.

I do really hate life but I somewhat taken an appreciation for my own suffering, a masochist way of living almost to please my relatives how had the misfortune to be in my life.
 
hellispink

hellispink

poisonous
May 26, 2022
1,229
The pain must be unbearable for anyone to decide this path, whatever age they are. Getting help? That's a privilege. Not everyone can access help, not everyone has a support network friends or family, not everyone has money to pay someone to pretend they care. Mental health is a privilege in most countries where health costs an arm and a leg so the normal person can't just be like oh let me see what my options are. Most people do not even have options. Aside from that there are circustances that just kill the person inside. The world is rotten no amount of therapy will fix the hunger of millions or that the oceans are dying or that people are abused everyday and that it wont stop cause humans are disgusting. There is just no way out. The only way to keep existing is to ignore the world and live in a bubble which I respect but everyone has a choice if they dont want that for themselves anymore
 
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Goukan「強姦」

Goukan「強姦」

Member
May 4, 2023
15
The pain must be unbearable for anyone to decide this path, whatever age they are. Getting help? That's a privilege. Not everyone can access help, not everyone has a support network friends or family, not everyone has money to pay someone to pretend they care. Mental health is a privilege in most countries where health costs an arm and a leg so the normal person can't just be like oh let me see what my options are. Most people do not even have options. Aside from that there are circustances that just kill the person inside. The world is rotten no amount of therapy will fix the hunger of millions or that the oceans are dying or that people are abused everyday and that it wont stop cause humans are disgusting. There is just no way out. The only way to keep existing is to ignore the world and live in a bubble which I respect but everyone has a choice if they dont want that for themselves anymore
I totally agree with you that private treatment is a privilege. The fact that the US doesn't have free health care is a totally travesty to human rights. I totally respect that someone just can't take it anymore humans are frail and they can take so much before just not taking anymore. I blame the world we live in where we expect too much good from humans when we're me just disgusting and vile like any other animals.

Even all that said, I'm perplexed to accept someone suicidality on the spot. I know it's impossible but sometimes I wish I could know everyone's story that lead them to here or to CTB. To make logic in my head of their actions. Sometimes I feel like it's a shame to go out without telling the world they did to you because the scumbags of this earth just keep winning.

I feel like if a "normie" would read such pessimistic rant that how they will majoritively see us. Irrational.

I just wish things would be different for us... that's why it's hard for me to accept suicide as valid of a choice it was to take it.
 
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