Story The huggy-trolly wars

[TAW122]

This is a story of how I ended up embroiled in a war against a pro-life society, along with the backstory and all. This occurred from many years ago and from 2014-2015 was the spark that lit up the powder keg which lead to a social and one man war against society.

The prelude to the huggy-trolly wars (Background/Backstory):
So it is late 2014, and I moved away from home to go to Grad School. I had a roommate with me and at first we got along. He is a religious person while I am not. One day, we got into a discussion about right to die and euthanasia. Long story short, the issues about it boiled over and never reached a good conclusion or agreeance, with him believing it is ok to impose pro-life over pro-choice people or suicidal people and stuff. Just fyi, he is very religious and stuff, but he only makes very rare exceptions (people who are terminally ill). He is gate keeping on who should or shouldn't be allowed right to die or voluntary euthanasia or death with dignity.

So as a result, things got heated and relations soured things gone to shit. There was no resolution to be had (and likely never), so I couldn't accept it. Then in 2015, back when I had some blue-pilled philosophy on life, I still had some 'faith' in professional help. (A mistake I made over and over until late 2018 where I decided never to seek professional help ever unless I was forced to, which the latter doesn't count.)

As a cope in late 2015, I went to disrupt certain professors' classes because I couldn't accept the idea where people (pro-lifers) can get away with imposing their will on others, consequence free, backed by the status quo and even the government itself (institutions in place and all). In actuality, I'm pretty sure my targets are all pro-lifers, anti-choicers, forced-lifers. Thus, the hugging and trolling wars have begun.

The Hug and Troll Wars
To begin, what do I mean by the hugging and trolling wars? It is an extended conflict, a war that I have waged against pro-lifers and anti-choice people as a result of the fallout and failed resolution that stems from my roommate issue back in 2014-2015 (possibly even further back).

Look, I am not a saint. I've had wrongs too just like almost everyone. Before you jump to any conclusions, hear me out first. While I've done some shitty things in the past, I did nothing illegal or criminal, just some annoying and 'asshole-like' behavior towards my targets in society. Fortunately, I don't do that anymore and it's thanks to certain important people (that I deem important) interacting with me in a meaningful way (yes includes hugging and stuff).

So over the years, up until I actually met my 'ladyfriend', I waged a tiring and exhausting war to push back against a pro-life, anti-choice, prohibitionist society. You can think of it like a TAW122 vs society thing, me (alone) vs the entire society (all – or at least the majority of them, minus a few people close to me because I don't want to metaphorically, shit where I eat.)

The criterion I used (in more detail):
The criteria is simple. Basically it was hoping that I get hugs from the people I expect to get hugged from. If I didn't get hugged by said person (meaning the person didn't wish to hug me for whatever reason, be it personal, just because, or any silly reason (or legit reason even), etc.), then I would seek out a target to disrupt or troll. At it's peak, I've had a new method of trolling them, which involved something from anime related characters. Simply put, I printed out pocket sized card slips of these characters and laminated them. I carry a few of these with me, and if there was ever a time where the conditions were met for said criteria, I'd deploy them. Now you might ask, why am I using "hugs" as a weapon (in other words, weaponizing hugs)? Well, it serves a dual purpose. The first purpose is to cope and then the second purpose is to wage a war against pro-lifers (but in a rather asymmetrical and soft way), basically make them uncomfortable enough (where they violate my right and freedom of choice to choose between CTB or life, I mess with their consent on physical affection, meaning that if they refuse, I would still respect their decision, but they aren't really going to get to freely exercise it. They're getting a 'gift' (the pocket sized anime character showing a middle finger.) and some insult, and failing that, I may mess with their event, or others (they are a part of society) so I see myself as "giving society a taste of their own medicine" at least in a twisted way. Note: One exception is if they have hugged me before at least once, then if they didn't later on, it wouldn't count against them because they have already fulfilled the entry (think of it like a Pokédex in Pokémon, so a successful 'hug' is a capture and entry in the hugdex, hug log).

Example 1: There are several people, person A, B, C, D in a group. A, B, and D hugged TAW122, but C didn't. She didn't, so TAW122 gave her one of my anime cards (with a middle finger on it).

Example 2: Similarly to the first example, C refused, but C has hugged TAW122 in the past before (at least once), then C gets away without consequence.

I could give many other examples and more complex criterion (with exceptions and what not) but this is just the basic gist of the algorithm I apply during my war. Keep in mind that I see pro-lifers as one big whole group so each one individual is a part of this big whole group (society), so in a sense, I'm at war against society. Also, I have many more life stories of turmoils and wars (before grad school even and during childhood) but this one is the most relevant one pertaining to the present and most relevant. Plus, this is just supporting and additional stories to help the reader understand why this 'ladyfriend' of mine is very profound to me.

 

[TAW122]

Just as a reminder, that the huggy-trolly wars started as a result of unsolved dispute and argument I had with my roommate (and of course, society at large) about the topics of euthanasia and right to die. This was all the way back in 2015 or so, before I found SS. Most importantly, it wasn't just regular hugs, but the 'ladyfriend' that I speak of that made the difference.

Also in other instances, hugs (from the right people and different people have different effects and such) have prevented a big disaster and/or at least curbed maladaptive copes and other negative actions that I take out on society. I'm not here to claim what I did was right or wrong (that's another topic altogether), but explaining my thought process and reasoning for why I took such actions in the first place.

 

[TAW122]

Just bumping this for people to read. Also, wanted to add that since most people in the real world are pro-lifers and anti-choicers (people who don't respect one's decision of self-determination and would rather force someone to live against their will, meaning that they will impose 'life' at all costs), I am not sorry for what I've done in the past. There will people who object to my behavior in the past, but I don't because I see it as getting back at a society that has denied us our right to self-determination and forced us to endure pain and suffering by refusing to allow us to die with dignity.

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

If I'm understanding correctly...

Others don't give consent to and negate your right to do with your own body as you choose, to kill yourself.

Others from whom you expect hugs do not hug you, so you negate your consent to do with their bodies as they choose.

They become your targets. You're pretty sure but not certain they are pro-lifers, anti-choicers, etc.

You give them a laminated Pokemon card with an extended middle finger. I assume this is your way of declaring war, your calling card. Then you methodically escalate leading to trolling them at events to disrupt.

At what point are they made aware that you have a platform and agenda and that your actions are political and about pro-choice? At what point are they given the opportunity to make known for certain they are anti-choice so that you don't make an error and they end up as collateral damage in your war?

Does the card say anything about your pro-choice stance to educate them, and about your rationale for negating their right? Do you send them letters or emails or post on their social media explaining your stance?

 

[TAW122]

If I'm understanding correctly...

Others don't give consent to and negate your right to do with your own body as you choose, to kill yourself.

Others from whom you expect hugs do not hug you, so you negate your consent to do with their bodies as they choose.

They become your targets. You're pretty sure but not certain they are pro-lifers, anti-choicers, etc.

You give them a laminated Pokemon card with an extended middle finger. I assume this is your way of declaring war, your calling card. Then you methodically escalate leading to trolling them at events to disrupt.

At what point are they made aware that you have a platform and agenda and that your actions are political and about pro-choice? At what point are they given the opportunity to make known for certain they are anti-choice so that you don't make an error and they end up as collateral damage in your war?

Does the card say anything about your pro-choice stance to educate them, and about your rationale for negating their right? Do you send them letters or emails or post on their social media explaining your stance?

Before I start to respond, I will make a quick disclaimer and mention that this was in the past, well before I joined SS and as of late last year, I have ceased this kind of behavior in public. With that said, let me unpack your statements one by one.

The first part, yes that is why they are prolifers (or forced lifers as they negate my right to do with my own body as I choose, which is basically forcing me to 'live' by the default option).

The next statement, I think you meant "negate their consent" to do with their bodies as they choose. (I had to correct the verbiage as this is context dependent so it one word can mean the difference between light and day) As far as negating their consent, no I did not. I still respected their choice, meaning I didn't "force hug" them, but instead just protested and objected to their action by giving them a gift of a card with the middle finger on it, just to voice my discontent.

While I have never had a discussion with every single target that confirms 100% that they are a pro-lifer, anti-choicer, I will say that I have found various evidence that they are pro-lifers, simply by seeing their social media (it's public) and/or having discussions about other stuff not exactly related to CTB, but hearing how they are against letting a terminally ill person go in peace or similar conversations (again not directly related to CTB, death). Another way I find out is that they are religious, especially when they are very staunch about their views on religion and God, and prude about things.

You are correct about the risk of collateral damage, and at that time (in 2015 or so), I considered that the risk was very low as the amount of pro-choicers are slim then as well too so I accepted the risk. Yeah it probably wasn't the best idea, but given that time, I was so inundated with pro-life people and all (this was before SS forum even existed), so I decided to lash out as a outlet.

Yes, while I could have brought up pro-choice and/or addressed such topics, it was too risky for me as I'm outnumbered IRL and would have made me very vulnerable, meaning that if they knew my true stances, they would be after me and even try to keep track, harry, and even try to intervene (basically going into my business and try to fish out 'red flags' to use against me).

No my card did not address any of that, and at the time, I was using their refusal to hug me as a attack on my pro-choice stance so I turned it around back against them. While I could have broached the subject, I didn't want to risk being outed and being harried for holding such views. I see myself as a persecuted group (pro-choicer) in a pro-life society and I had a more me vs the world at large mentality at that time.

In conclusion, I don't and never claim that I'm a saint, far from it. I have my own weaknesses and flaws as well, I'm not perfect. The main reason I told this old story from many years ago was to illustrate some of the things I did against a pro-life, anti-choice, prohibitionist society. I'm not sorry for why I did what I did back then, but I can say I don't do that anymore nor plan on doing so anytime in the future. I've grown, matured, and changed since the last year or so. With that said, from present day and moving forward, yes it is probably not a good way to help our cause and I'd do better to appeal to people who are actually pro-choice (people on this forum) for instance.