Discussion The hidden connotations of the Pride Month

[Unbearable Mr. Bear]

Okay, before I even begin ranting, THIS IS NOT AGAINST LGBT+ AND LGBT+ FRIENDLY PEOPLE!!! If anything, you could be victims of what I'm going to elaborate now.

Okay so, Pride Month is up, woohoo! I'm Bisexual myself but never really got into the LGBT+ "community", so maybe my views are biased in some way or another, but I think Pride Month may have a hidden connotation that may actually hurt LGBT+ people. Hear me out:

So, we got a month to celebrate, yippie! That's wonderful, to have a whole month just for us, to celebrate our identity and how it should be accepted...until I realized...why a month for that? Shouldn't we be proud of our identity the whole year round? And that's when it downed on me: Why would the LGBT+ community get a month for themselves, if not for them to just "stop being queer" the other eleven months? It doesn't really make sense to have only a month for pride, because it isn't something that we wear one month like a costume. It's us, we are LGBT+, and we don't stop being LGBT+ after pride month. Does that mean that we can only be proud that month, and the rest we have to shut up about what we are?

I know I'm probably going full paranoid mode now, but maybe LGBT+phobic people get this inverted: They get 11 months to shame us! We got only 1 month to have pride!

And that's not going into how capitalism basically transformed pride month into "Let's scam LGBT+ people off their money with cheap rainbow labeled crap!". Yeah, there are good products out there that are meant to be pride-related, but I'm not talking about the products. I'm talking about the corporations, that spend the entire month with a rainbow-mask, pretending they care about LGBT+ people, when they only care about how much money they can suck out of them. Worse, some of them are often funding anti-LGBT+ stuff with the money they get. A painful irony.

Anyway, here are my thoughts, the rotten produce is to the right, feel free to throw it at me now.

 

[imtiredasf]

I've heard it termed as Rainbow Capitalism somewhere, and that's stuck with me since. A corporation doesn't care about you, or your life. They care about products, and how to sell them to you. Every attempt they make at being relatable or socially conscious is just an effort to sell you more junk.

 

[Unbearable Mr. Bear]

I've heard it termed as Rainbow Capitalism somewhere, and that's stuck with me since. A corporation doesn't care about you, or your life. They care about products, and how to sell them to you. Every attempt they make at being relatable or socially conscious is just an effort to sell you more junk.

I heard it as "Pinkwashing" as well. It's just...I feel sad. Cause sometimes we got no choice but to buy from them, and they use our money against us...

 

[Rynalia]

I'm gonna be super real here--like maybe I'm just super jaded these days or what not, but I haven't given a damn about pride month for years, because I've always thought it was almost like a competition of who can virtue signal the most. But I've also had way too many run ins with people a little bit too enthusiastic to the point where I catch a few strays in the crossfire minding my own business.

Like, with most dedicated days/weeks/months, there was a story, there was a meaning behind all of it at first, but time and people took their hands and mucked it all up--often for profit--monetary or otherwise. At least to me, I can't see the statement.

Maybe I just don't get what modern day pride celebration is about, I guess. Like, woo... I'm myself...? Yay...? Is probably the most I can say. So I personally just let everyone else have their month of festivities and the like while staying far and relatively uninvolved.

Apparently this is totally unacceptable to some people and I find myself on the receiving end of pitchforks and banshee wails assailing me with accusations of internalized _____phobia.

Did I mention I might be really jaded about pride month?

 

[The Actual Devil]

I was going to start a thread just called "HAPPY PRIDE," but I think I'll just pop in here to say:
As regent of the Pride Circle, I wish all of you a happy Pride Month, corporations be damned!
Also, here is Pride Moth, a close friend of mine:

 

[Unbearable Mr. Bear]

I was going to start a thread just called "HAPPY PRIDE," but I think I'll just pop in here to say:
As regent of the Pride Circle, I wish all of you a happy Pride Month, corporations be damned!
Also, here is Pride Moth, a close friend of mine:
View attachment 168281

AWAWAWAW they're so cute! Sorry but I needed to take this out of my chest.

 

[The Actual Devil]

AWAWAWAW they're so cute! Sorry but I needed to take this out of my chest.

That's furrrfectly fine, Mr. Bear. Just be careful not to take anything out of your chest that you can't live without, yeah?

 

[Unbearable Mr. Bear]

Also a side note...I just...don't like the expectations that people have with LGBT+ people, and by that I mean even inside the LGBT+ community. That's why I don't participate.

EDIT: Ok for some reason I'm now in the verge of a panic attack. I don't think I should have made this thread

 

[Rynalia]

Also a side note...I just...don't like the expectations that people have with LGBT+ people, and by that I mean even inside the LGBT+ community. That's why I don't participate.

On that latter part... I always found it absurd how marginalized communities find ways to marginalize their own people. Like shit. Who needs third parties to gatekeep when the community can do it themselves... With even more vitriol!

 

[The Actual Devil]

On that latter part... I always found it absurd how marginalized communities find ways to marginalize their own people. Like shit. Who needs third parties to gatekeep when the community can do it themselves... With even more vitriol!

Yeah, I've seen supposedly gay people bashing on bi people when they are in a heteronormative relationship, like, bruz, they're bi—not poly—what do they have to prove to you?
Also, the right-wing gays that hate on trans people... FOR REAL!?

NO PRIDE FOR YOU!!!

Stand together or die apart: If it ain't you today, it'll be you tomorrow!

 

[Unbearable Mr. Bear]

Yeah, I've seen supposedly gay people bashing on bi people when they are in a heteronormative relationship, like, bruz, they're bi—not poly—what do they have to prove to you?
Also, the right-wing gays that hate on trans people... FOR REAL!?

NO PRIDE FOR YOU!!!

Stand together or die apart: If it ain't you today, it'll be you tomorrow!

Does that mean that since I'm not part of the community, I'll just die apart? Sorry, I'm getting real sad now.

 

[The Actual Devil]

Does that mean that since I'm not part of the community, I'll just die apart? Sorry, I'm getting real sad now.

No, just ones that seek to divide will.
C'mere, you!

 

[SVEN]

Also a side note...I just...don't like the expectations that people have with LGBT+ people, and by that I mean even inside the LGBT+ community. That's why I don't participate.

EDIT: Ok for some reason I'm now in the verge of a panic attack. I don't think I should have made this thread

If it helps any, this hetero male believes that you should feel fine about expressing how you feel on this group, Mr Bear. Your feelings are as valid as anyone elses', vent away m8.

 

[Pluto]

 

[Whale_bones]

I get where you're coming from, and there's nothing wrong with feeling this way, but I do encourage you to look into the history of Pride a little. It might give you a sense of where this came from. The reason we have the basic rights we do now is because people were arrested, beaten and worse and they envisioned a day where we could just say "I'm me, so what". Where we could hold hands with our bf/gf in public and not be yelled at, kicked out of restaurants, or physically attacked for it. That's where Pride came from.

Yes, corporations have used Pride for their own means and continue to pump out bullshit like they always do, but to me that's a separate thing. Pride wasn't started by corporations, it was started by people who had no power but envisioned a better- or atleast, less shitty- world.

Also a side note...I just...don't like the expectations that people have with LGBT+ people, and by that I mean even inside the LGBT+ community. That's why I don't participate.

I understand what you mean with this too, and it's fine to feel different, because I can guarantee you there's many others that feel they don't "fit the mold" either. Just remember that, like your first post is saying, every LGBTQ+ person is a regular person just like anyone else. That means there's as wide and varied personalities in the community as there are in any other part of the population. There are going to be people with shitty opinions who you don't vibe with, but if you never participate, then you also don't have the opportunity to meet the people with good opinions who you do resonate with.

That's not to say anyone has to participate at all, just to say that the internet usually has the worst of anything, where the people with the most time on their hands are the loudest. So it's often not a good representation of IRL interactions.

 

[Forveleth]

I always found it absurd how marginalized communities find ways to marginalize their own people. Like shit. Who needs third parties to gatekeep when the community can do it themselves... With even more vitriol!

Similar to this is the amount of infighting that happens in the community. I have always said that the non cis-het community would have crazy rights and access to treatment, freedoms, etc if we fought conservatives as hard as we fought each other. One admirable quality conservatives have is being able to unite behind a cause as a single entity. The LGBT+ community will agree on a major issue but then lose the plot arguing over flag colors.

 

[psp3000]

I choose not to focus on the rainbow washing but instead just historical things and documentaries and films

but also I do this all year round instead of just durinh Pride month etc.

some I would recommend are:

Paris is Burning 1990

Dragtime 1997

Brokeback Mountain 2005

Chemsex 2015 (this one is a bit disturbing and talks about the issue of drug use, abuse, and addiction and high risk sexual behaviors being combined with drugs)

Southern Comfort 2001

The Gift 2003 (this one if controversial and people have conflicting feelings and reviews about it, cover the topic of a rare kink/fetish of Bug Chasers and Gift Givers)

But I'm a Cheerleader 1999 (A CLASSIC)

Showgirls 1995 (only a few gay things happen in the film besides a lot of drama, a cult classic so bad it's good movie)

To Wong Foo Thanks For Everything Julie Newmar 1995

Pose 2018 (a show/series from FX)

The Adventures of Priscilla Queen of The Desert 1994

+ various documentaries about Club Kid Culture and True Crime Docs from the 90s about the crimes of Michael Alig

this is just a list of the films I remember watching but there's so much more I probably can't remember yet along with some ones in my watchlist that are highly recommended

 

[cemeteryismyhome]

I'm baffled by the whole thing, and other things like this, regardless of the topic. I'm suspicious of the political and economic convenience.

 

[PimpHand]

They do the same things with autism, Down Sindrome, Yellow September and more... just so that corporations can earn money through ESG and DEI exibitions...

My job does that shit all the time. But they still put things like "Sex" into the clients's personal information. And you can only choose male and female. That's pure bullshit. Science proved the "sex" binary doesn't exist. A woman was born with an Y chromossome and gave birth. And like, why does sex matter when you are under hrt, that shit changes everything in you.

I think those "XYZ months" should be used to gather people to protest against the government and demand things like more safety and publioc healthcare, job protection, end all forms of discrimination like banning trans people form military or gay people form blood donations...

Instead, it's just a big festival. And it is very good for selling things... Smh

 

[soonnotkoei]

"hey look we changed our logo to a rainbow to show how much we care about the community!!! (also we need to please the shareholders)"

fuck corpos.

 

[Unbearable Mr. Bear]

internet usually has the worst of anything

*looks at where I am* ...So, if we're the worst of hopeless people...I'd say we're pretty alright.

I know the LGBT+ community has a LOOOOOONG story of fighting for something that is probably as old as humanity itself, but I don't mean to demean the people that genuinely care and make the month a celebration of the whole LGBT+ fight. I'm not talking about those. I'm talking about those that use the month for personal gain, and then use that personal gain against the community. I'm sad it happens, but it does, and that's why I choose to pride myself on being myself every month. If pride month goes away, pride won't, and LGBT+ people will still fight for the right of being themselves, no matter if the powers that be allow us to "have" a month or not!

So in the end, I'm just saying that it's not pride month for me. It's pride year, pride decade, pride century, pride millennia. The pride never stops, no matter how much others try to twist its meaning. It may get other names and other ways, but it will happen, as long as there are LGBT+ people, and believe me, there is a fuckton of those in every single place.

 

[Whale_bones]

*looks at where I am* ...So, if we're the worst of hopeless people...I'd say we're pretty alright.

"The internet" meaning the whole internet. Instead of saying "has" I should have phrased it as "the internet includes the worst of anything" to be more specific. I definitely didn't mean everywhere on the internet is bad, lol. There are pockets of the internet with plenty of supportive and wonderful people (here, for example) but there's also pockets where people who are purposefully destructive and awful gather. As I say, my point was that it's often not reflective of IRL interactions and situations.

I'm talking about those that use the month for personal gain, and then use that personal gain against the community. I'm sad it happens, but it does.

Right, and that was what I was referencing about people with shitty opinions. I'm acknowledging the parts that have been turned sour by bad actors and corporations, while also acknowledging that, as someone who has admittedly never been involved as part of the community, you may have never had the chance to see all the positive and meaningful parts. The bad actors don't erase the meaningful parts, just like shitty corners of the internet don't erase the helpful parts of it.

When you're wondering "why is there only a month for this" or what good it does, there's an answer to that. That answer may or may not be something you care about, and either way is fine, but there is a very real, significant reason for why Pride started and why it's still going today.

I'm also acknowledging that no one has to be involved and it's perfectly fine to just say "this isn't particularly relevant to me". However, anyone who is forming general judgments of the community and what Pride means, without knowing where it started or what the meaningful parts of the community do, is doing so without a pretty big chunk of information. That's why I'm responding- your opinions are valid and there's no problem with expressing them, but I'm in turn expressing mine to say there is a lot more out there than just the negative sides.

 

[Unbearable Mr. Bear]

"The internet" meaning the whole internet. Instead of saying "has" I should have phrased it as "the internet includes the worst of anything" to be more specific. I definitely didn't mean everywhere on the internet is bad, lol. There are pockets of the internet with plenty of supportive and wonderful people (here, for example) but there's also pockets where people who are purposefully destructive and awful gather. As I say, my point was that it's often not reflective of IRL interactions and situations.



Right, and that was what I was referencing about people with shitty opinions. I'm acknowledging the parts that have been turned sour by bad actors and corporations, while also acknowledging that, as someone who has admittedly never been involved as part of the community, you may have never had the chance to see all the positive and meaningful parts. The bad actors don't erase the meaningful parts, just like shitty corners of the internet don't erase the helpful parts of it.

When you're wondering "why is there only a month for this" or what good it does, there's an answer to that. That answer may or may not be something you care about, and either way is fine, but there is a very real, significant reason for why Pride started and why it's still going today.

I'm also acknowledging that no one has to be involved and it's perfectly fine to just say "this isn't particularly relevant to me". However, anyone who is forming general judgments of the community and what Pride means, without knowing where it started or what the meaningful parts of the community do, is doing so without a pretty big chunk of information. That's why I'm responding- your opinions are valid and there's no problem with expressing them, but I'm in turn expressing mine to say there is a lot more out there than just the negative sides.

I never said that there isn't a lot more than just the negative sides, just that the negative sides are the more apparent ones to me. I'm not gonna pretend that pride was and is a source of power for LGBT+ people, I'm just telling you what I see, what is shown to me. Right or wrong, it was what was shown to me. All I'm doing is presenting my opinion.

Doesn't help that every time I discuss this I get the beginning of an anxiety attack.

 

[Whale_bones]

I never said that there isn't a lot more than just the negative sides, just that the negative sides are the more apparent ones to me. I'm not gonna pretend that pride was and is a source of power for LGBT+ people, I'm just telling you what I see, what is shown to me. Right or wrong, it was what was shown to me. All I'm doing is presenting my opinion.

Doesn't help that every time I discuss this I get the beginning of an anxiety attack.

I've tried to be really purposeful in stating that your opinion is valid, I see where you're coming from, there's no problem with expressing your opinions, and acknowledging what you say. I have another perspective, which I think is fair to share on a discussion forum.

I'm not sure what else I could have said re:the things in the first sentence, while still being honest and genuine in presenting my own perspective. I don't think there's anything left to discuss, so I'll wish you a pleasant rest of your day (or night).

 

[Unbearable Mr. Bear]

I've tried to be really purposeful in stating that your opinion is valid, I see where you're coming from, there's no problem with expressing your opinions, and acknowledging what you say. I have another perspective, which I think is fair to share on a discussion forum.

I'm not sure what else I could have said re:the things in the first sentence, while still being honest and genuine in presenting my own perspective. I don't think there's anything left to discuss, so I'll wish you a pleasant rest of your day (or night).

It's not your fault, It's okay. All I needed to do is not make this thread.

 

[WhatCouldHaveBeen32]

The idea is that pride month was a thing that wasn't invented by corpos, yes now it's being used by corpos as you said to sort of get on our side but it wasn't theirs to begin with and the only ones who have a problem with pride month have a problem with critical thinking, for example, my existance as ace isn't the sole reason snickers or bmw (I have no idea who uses the rainbow logo, just putting out two big products) use the rainbow logo, their reasoning is money, they want to emotionally use us to buy their products.


It's scummy and yes for the rest of the 11 months we don't exist to them but we shouldn't hide our put ourselves down for that.

 

[SnowLeopard21]

It's just a month-long Valentine's Day the way I see it. Pride's pointless without the love that makes it matter in the first place.

 

[EvisceratedJester]

Pride was created to commemorate the Stone Wall Riots, hence why it occurred in June. I don't get why you would assume pride month = not being able to be proud of your identity for the other 11 months of the year. That doesn't even make any sense. While there are valid complaints to be had with pride, specifically with regards to how large corporations seek to capitalize off of it, I don't get why you feel like having a pride month somehow implies you can't be queer for the rest of the year...

 

[Forveleth]

Pride was created to commemorate the Stone Wall Riots, hence why it occurred in June. I don't get why you would assume pride month = not being able to be proud of your identity for the other 11 months of the year. That doesn't even make any sense. While there are valid complaints to be had with pride, specifically with regards to how large corporations seek to capitalize off of it, I don't get why you feel like having a pride month somehow implies you can't be queer for the rest of the year...

I think the point is more the LGBT+ community is more recognized, celebrated, and more accepted during June becuae it is "Pride month". Whereas the rest of the year, the community is treated very differently. Like, during June it is suddenly cool to be gay but it is not the other 11 months of the year.

Think of it like Mother's Day. People go out of their way to do super nice things for mom but 95% of people would not do the exact same thing any other say of the year. The only reason they are super mice to mom is because some greeting card company decided it was a holiday for her.

In June, corporations sell all sorts of rainbow stuff and allies come out of the woodwork, but where are those same people, say, come October?

 

[The Actual Devil]