
onestepcloser
Member
- Jul 11, 2022
- 6
I have been on the edge for my entire life, suicidal for about 3 years and spent countless hours researching methods. I suffer from severe OCD, which despite medication, does not let me live a normal life, and even in the thought of death it sometimes does not let me find comfort. This illness renders me very paranoid, thus making me overthink and overanalyse everything to the smallest detail.
In my search for the perfect suicide method I always bumped into certain ways things could go wrong even in the most classic suicide methods. For example:
- during a jumping suicide, one might somehow flip during the fall, resulting in a feet first landing and surviving paralyzed or some shit
- during a gas asphyxiation suicide, the gas might not be the advertised purity, probably being mixed with some amount of oxygen, thus resulting into failure
These might be real concerns or might just be my OCD going full paranoia thinking of the most unlikely yet possible ways things could go wrong.
However, it is astounding to me how many people are willing to throw themselves in some of the riskiest methods, like the SN method as I've been seeing lately on this forum. It seems that such methods gain traction due to being advertised as "painless", that being a huge rock off the shoulders to people who are already in great distress. However, I think substance methods are some of the riskiest since most people barely understand how these things work just from a few forum posts written by strangers. On paper anything can look good but in practice things can go south real quick.
This being said, I do believe the best way to go is the simplest way to go. The absolute safest and most failproof way to go would be a gun, since all you have to do is point and shoot. Failure can happen yes, but you must be an absolute idiot to aim it the wrong way. Since I am not in USA, a gun might not an option for me. I thought about getting a tourist visa to travel to the US and getting a gun from some shady dealer but I don't know how easy it is to get a gun. I have a large amount of money saved up so that would be no problem. The problem is that I lack the connections to get ahold of such things.
Anyway, thanks for reading my little speech. Bye...
In my search for the perfect suicide method I always bumped into certain ways things could go wrong even in the most classic suicide methods. For example:
- during a jumping suicide, one might somehow flip during the fall, resulting in a feet first landing and surviving paralyzed or some shit
- during a gas asphyxiation suicide, the gas might not be the advertised purity, probably being mixed with some amount of oxygen, thus resulting into failure
These might be real concerns or might just be my OCD going full paranoia thinking of the most unlikely yet possible ways things could go wrong.
However, it is astounding to me how many people are willing to throw themselves in some of the riskiest methods, like the SN method as I've been seeing lately on this forum. It seems that such methods gain traction due to being advertised as "painless", that being a huge rock off the shoulders to people who are already in great distress. However, I think substance methods are some of the riskiest since most people barely understand how these things work just from a few forum posts written by strangers. On paper anything can look good but in practice things can go south real quick.
This being said, I do believe the best way to go is the simplest way to go. The absolute safest and most failproof way to go would be a gun, since all you have to do is point and shoot. Failure can happen yes, but you must be an absolute idiot to aim it the wrong way. Since I am not in USA, a gun might not an option for me. I thought about getting a tourist visa to travel to the US and getting a gun from some shady dealer but I don't know how easy it is to get a gun. I have a large amount of money saved up so that would be no problem. The problem is that I lack the connections to get ahold of such things.
Anyway, thanks for reading my little speech. Bye...