The belief that EVERYONE who unsuccessfully CTB is grateful they failed

[Khaos]

I hear this all the time by pro-lifers who are so adamant against people who choose to CTB, saying that they'll "definitely" regret it.
They'll use a few people's attempted (as they'll call it "failed) suicide and the said people personally regretting it as "evidence" that everyone who attempts it will ultimately regret it.

Yes, many who attempt it do regret it, but that's very personal. How can these people speak for each of our unique thoughts, feelings, and experiences?

For example, I am living proof that I do not regret that I tried to take my life. No, what I do regret is that I let you kind of people catch me in the act, and as a result, make me feel ashamed for being "ungrateful". I mean, I still committed more attempts anyway, but ouch.

These are the same people who wonder why suicidal people feel as if barely anyone can understand them. But these are also the same people come up with biased "research" to negate what many who are suicidal are genuinely feeling (e.g. "93% said they regret it/they didn't actually mean to/it was just for attention).

Please, do not bother trying to understand us if you are actively avoiding exploring our true feelings and intents.

 

[Life_and_Death]

yeah. i havent heard it from prolifers but from people themselves. ive met A LOT more people that dont regret it. i mean how many people here are still trying?

 

[rhiino]

I would also regret that I failed in case I do. When you fail you can only regret. Btw I regret that I have not tried yet, so by the logic to not do what you regret I should then suicide right on the spot.

 

[Deleted member 17949]

Many people attempt multiple times, many of those succeeding. I am certainly not grateful for failing my attempt, and I doubt a lot of people are grateful for their failures. It seems to me that a lot of these 'regret' stories are from people that have now recovered or are recovering. It's not surprising really; encouraging suicide or saying anything that might be interpreted as encouragement is not really allowed, so you're not going to see stories about people failing and hating that they are still alive being widely shared.

People want to share recovery stories. Remember that these stories are generally part of suicide awareness and prevention rather than being there to give honest representations of how suicidal people feel.

 

[Saint-mal]

Ugh unfortunately I know one or two techs and social workers who probably use me as an example of that. But like bruh I'm not trying to stay in the ward for life so of course imma say I regret my attempt

 

[so tired or manic]

it's probably more along the lines of what they're actually regretting gets misinterpreted. i don't regret the action, but i regret that it wasn't successful.

people like that only see what they want to see and twist words around to fit their view.

that and people are quick so say, oh yeah, i'm normal look at me! no problems! to get people off their back

 

[Superdeterminist]

I HATE that, why do I hear it so often? They talk as if there are no exceptions, as if every single survivor regrets it, when common sense alone suggests that's complete rubbish.

 

[TAW122]

I fully agree with you. Pro-lifers couldn't be further from the truth and their ignorance shows with their naive beliefs. This is one of the main reasons I don't discuss about CTB IRL, not only because they aren't likely to change, but also because it's dangerous, and it results in them questioning and monitoring my day to day activities.

 

[SoIntoYou]

I haven't seen many critically depressed pro-lifers. Maybe they don't know what they're talking about?

 

[sadghost]

Yeah suicide prevention is super biased and there is only one perspective that is ever deemed acceptable - any evidence that contradicts "suicide = bad" is considered invalid. If you admit to not regretting your attempt you will simply be locked up against your will until you say you do. The bias is real

 

[Vault of Memories]

Speaking for myself, I've failed an attempt and am certainly not happy that I failed.

 

[TotallyIsolated]

Statistically speaking the opposite is closer to the truth. The majority of people who do eventually CtB needed more than one attempt to do so. Those people clearly weren't grateful for failing.

 

[Jessica5]

They're just saying it because they don't want to be committed.

You have to have the mental capacity of a 2 year old if you think somebody like Katie Stubblefield is telling the truth when she says she's glad she failed.

 

[Bauhaus]

people are quick so say, oh yeah, i'm normal look at me! no problems! to get people off their back

THIS
After a failed suicide attempt people obviously will scrutinize you so you obviously are not going to say you still feel suicidal !

 

[lostangel]

As others have said they want to push recovery stories. Also you won't really hear people saying they regret it in real life or online (besides here) because of being locked up or looked down upon. Unfortunately people don't want to associate with people who are suicidal/people who say they don't regret attempting. I'm speaking from my point of view btw.

 

[sezhian]

I for one am not grateful I failed. Nothing has changed, life is far worse now because people see me as someone who is unstable and suicidal. No one has ever wanted to understand or know the real me. As long as I put up fake smiles and keep saying I am fine and happy, no one gives a shit. Unless something becomes inconvenient to them, in which case they label you and leave your life. So tired and fucked up by this fucking life. And to top it all, after my failed attempt a week ago, everyone thinks they know what to say to make me "feel better". 33 years of pain doesn't just go away because of some positive quotes and statements!

THIS
After a failed suicide attempt people obviously will scrutinize you so you obviously are not going to say you still feel suicidal !

True that! Its more like you are laying low and waiting to convince everyone to leave you alone, so that you can prepare better and do it right the next time.

 

[TimeToBiteTheDust]

There was a Dutch man called Viktor Staudt who attempted ctb and lost his legs. He spent many years giving speeches against suicide and he ended up ctbing last year. So deep in his mind he wanted to kill himself.

 

[TotallyIsolated]

Same in the UK. The comic actor Stephen Fry is patron of a mental health charity and gives speeches about it, but then later he admitted to attempting to CtB during that time in an interview.

 

[CarbonMonoxide]

I hate to be blunt but it comes down to two choices. Either you want to ctb or you want to seek help. I used to seek help for my mental issues because I wanted to live. Now that I've realized the issues will never go away, I no longer seek help. I only seek to find the best method to end it as soon as I tie up loose ends. The only way to avoid prolifers and their selfish advice is to research your method, muscle through the SI and ctb successfully. Follow through with the method to the letter, not like those users here who take SN without the regimen or attempt ctb in a house full of people who are aware of their issues.

If you fail and get found you will suffer the consequences. Prolifers will always be that way, blindly pushing the lie that life is worth living no matter what. If you seek help you'll encounter them unless you're lucky enough to find that rare competent counselor. If you choose to seek help, do it. But if you choose ctb, it's no joke, you can't fool around with a half assed attempt and fail. You must take it with the seriousness that death deserves. In ctb there's simply no room for failure.

 

[rhiino]

There was a Dutch man called Viktor Staudt who attempted ctb and lost his legs. He spent many years giving speeches against suicide and he ended up ctbing last year. So deep in his mind he wanted to kill himself.

He probably just witnessed an opportunity to make money and used it. In the end it did not suffice so he did it again.

 

[Jessica5]

There was a Dutch man called Viktor Staudt who attempted ctb and lost his legs. He spent many years giving speeches against suicide and he ended up ctbing last year. So deep in his mind he wanted to kill himself.

Did he try a CTB by train? I'm not sure how else you can lose legs in a suicide attempt.