D
Dena
Member
- Oct 7, 2024
- 5
In the farthest chamber of the mind lives an ancient sovereign—
formless, faceless, yet absolute.
It speaks without voice, commands without gesture,
a quiet deity of ruin whispering through the corridors of thought.
Its presence bends every choice, like iron softened in the forge of fate.
It rises as storm,
descends as tide,
and washes the self clean of memory, will, and name.
This is the art of self-destruction.
Not an impulse—
but a ritual.
Not an accident—
but a pilgrimage.
A path laid long before your first breath, carved in the marrow of your being.
At times you glimpse a different life, a life woven from gentler threads—
but the vision shatters like glass dropped upon stone, and you awaken once more inside the labyrinth built from your own shadow.
And then comes the questioning, the ancient litany:
Why this road of ruin?
Why this unweaving of all that once resembled good?
The answer is not modern;
it is older than scripture, older than language:
Some souls are born
not to create,
but to unravel.
The descent begins subtly—
a hesitation,
a fracture—
until the self is slowly disassembled, bone by bone, belief by belief,
as though returning materials to the cosmic dust from which they came.
This, too, is art.
You withdraw from the tribe.
You let the ties that bind you fall away,
one thread at a time.
Solitude becomes a cloak—
heavy, familiar, indestructible.
People avert their eyes, not out of cruelty, but because your presence reflects the secret they fear:
that order is fragile,
that meaning is borrowed,
that existence can dissolve without warning.
Most humans crave monuments.
You crave erasure.
They fight to leave a footprint;
you walk where the sand devours every trace.
And so you ask:
What remains of me?
Nothing.
And in that nothingness,
a strange, austere peace.
You stepped away from the choreography of the living long ago.
Now each day is merely another echo in the machinery of existence,
another turn in the great, indifferent wheel.
It is not oblivion you long for—
but the stillness beyond suffering.
These are not the same.
Your wounds are mostly self-fashioned, forged in the workshop between nature and nurture.
Perhaps your curse is lucidity—
the ability to peel apart every emotion,
to examine memory the way a priest reads omens from the entrails of sacrificed beasts.
Some call this rumination.
You call it survival.
But what is it you are trying to save?
Ahead lies the final bend—
a threshold crossed only once, a path leading to the great Silent Realm,
where thought ends,
and pain collapses into dust.
For years you have walked the precipice of this world,
hoping the earth might shift and release you into deeper mysteries.
The shadow above grows denser,
as though the heavens themselves lean down to witness your vigil.
You wonder:
What compels people to cling to life?
What ancient impulse makes them grasp, gasp, fight?
Perhaps the truth is simple:
you have never lived—
only dreamed of living.
You have wandered through palaces of fantasy, inhabiting them as a ghost occupies the ruins of a forgotten temple.
But every dream ends the same:
with the solitary figure left among the broken pillars.
Better to choose solitude
than be cast into it by fate.
But let us tear away the last veil.
These are not doctrines—
but shelters built of shadow.
Numbness is safer than joy,
silence safer than hope.
For what we call happiness is merely the brain's small trick,
a fleeting alchemy of borrowed chemicals,
a fragile spark in the dark machinery of flesh.
And you are not a worshipper of sparks.
So you do the final, sovereign act:
you burn the world you once built,
before any other hand can claim the fire.
You are the architect of your own realm— even if that realm is barren, echoing, haunted by winds that speak in forgotten tongues.
But it is yours.
Only yours.
And in the language of all mortal endings:
Ashes to ashes.
Dust to dust.
formless, faceless, yet absolute.
It speaks without voice, commands without gesture,
a quiet deity of ruin whispering through the corridors of thought.
Its presence bends every choice, like iron softened in the forge of fate.
It rises as storm,
descends as tide,
and washes the self clean of memory, will, and name.
This is the art of self-destruction.
Not an impulse—
but a ritual.
Not an accident—
but a pilgrimage.
A path laid long before your first breath, carved in the marrow of your being.
At times you glimpse a different life, a life woven from gentler threads—
but the vision shatters like glass dropped upon stone, and you awaken once more inside the labyrinth built from your own shadow.
And then comes the questioning, the ancient litany:
Why this road of ruin?
Why this unweaving of all that once resembled good?
The answer is not modern;
it is older than scripture, older than language:
Some souls are born
not to create,
but to unravel.
The descent begins subtly—
a hesitation,
a fracture—
until the self is slowly disassembled, bone by bone, belief by belief,
as though returning materials to the cosmic dust from which they came.
This, too, is art.
You withdraw from the tribe.
You let the ties that bind you fall away,
one thread at a time.
Solitude becomes a cloak—
heavy, familiar, indestructible.
People avert their eyes, not out of cruelty, but because your presence reflects the secret they fear:
that order is fragile,
that meaning is borrowed,
that existence can dissolve without warning.
Most humans crave monuments.
You crave erasure.
They fight to leave a footprint;
you walk where the sand devours every trace.
And so you ask:
What remains of me?
Nothing.
And in that nothingness,
a strange, austere peace.
You stepped away from the choreography of the living long ago.
Now each day is merely another echo in the machinery of existence,
another turn in the great, indifferent wheel.
It is not oblivion you long for—
but the stillness beyond suffering.
These are not the same.
Your wounds are mostly self-fashioned, forged in the workshop between nature and nurture.
Perhaps your curse is lucidity—
the ability to peel apart every emotion,
to examine memory the way a priest reads omens from the entrails of sacrificed beasts.
Some call this rumination.
You call it survival.
But what is it you are trying to save?
Ahead lies the final bend—
a threshold crossed only once, a path leading to the great Silent Realm,
where thought ends,
and pain collapses into dust.
For years you have walked the precipice of this world,
hoping the earth might shift and release you into deeper mysteries.
The shadow above grows denser,
as though the heavens themselves lean down to witness your vigil.
You wonder:
What compels people to cling to life?
What ancient impulse makes them grasp, gasp, fight?
Perhaps the truth is simple:
you have never lived—
only dreamed of living.
You have wandered through palaces of fantasy, inhabiting them as a ghost occupies the ruins of a forgotten temple.
But every dream ends the same:
with the solitary figure left among the broken pillars.
Better to choose solitude
than be cast into it by fate.
But let us tear away the last veil.
These are not doctrines—
but shelters built of shadow.
Numbness is safer than joy,
silence safer than hope.
For what we call happiness is merely the brain's small trick,
a fleeting alchemy of borrowed chemicals,
a fragile spark in the dark machinery of flesh.
And you are not a worshipper of sparks.
So you do the final, sovereign act:
you burn the world you once built,
before any other hand can claim the fire.
You are the architect of your own realm— even if that realm is barren, echoing, haunted by winds that speak in forgotten tongues.
But it is yours.
Only yours.
And in the language of all mortal endings:
Ashes to ashes.
Dust to dust.
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