Tent is setup

[Whatshouldmynamebe]

The tent is setup, the idea is to drink SN around 12 without my phone

SI is very high, that's why I opted for the tent in the woods rather than the hotel room.

I am scared and I am feeling immensely guilty

 

[Jealous Blackheart]

What do you feel guilty about?

 

[Whatshouldmynamebe]

What do you feel guilty about?

The pain I'll be leaving behind with my girlfriend and family

 

[Pizarnikishere]

I wish that your plans go as you wish and that you have all the peace and freedom you want. Take care and good travels

 

[Jealous Blackheart]

The pain I'll be leaving behind with my girlfriend and family

It's good to have people miss you I think. Makes it feel like you did something right. To have people who care.
I won't have this problem when I go but I hope to follow soon. It might take me a few more weeks to source sn but I'm being patient. It's been years. I can manage days.
I hope you find what you're looking for.

 

[Whatshouldmynamebe]

It's good to have people miss you I think. Makes it feel like you did something right. To have people who care.
I won't have this problem when I go but I hope to follow soon. It might take me a few more weeks to source sn but I'm being patient. It's been years. I can manage days.
I hope you find what you're looking for.

Thank you for the kind words, it's just heart breaking, I do love the people in my life but my brain simply will not cooperate, they don't deserve this.

I hope all of your plans go well

 

[Worndown]

You will be a Happy Camper!
Best wishes.

 

[Whatshouldmynamebe]

Heading to the store to grab measuring device, cups and water

 

[Gonnerr]

Good luck , i hope you escape peacefully.

 

[kipper]

The woods always felt to me to be a very serene place, fitting for final moments. I wish you the best and goodnight.

 

[Unattainable666]

The tent is setup, the idea is to drink SN around 12 without my phone

SI is very high, that's why I opted for the tent in the woods rather than the hotel room.

I am scared and I am feeling immensely guilty

All I can say is that if you have any doubts it doesn't need to be done right now. If you've made the decision out of stress or anxiety, take your time. You can always ctb when you are really ready and there is absolutely NO shame in changing your mind (btw - I am pro choice so if this sound anti ctb it's not)

 

[Wyldfyre4948]

Hopefully it's a clear night and you can look at the stars beforehand.

 

[Whatshouldmynamebe]

All I can say is that if you have any doubts it doesn't need to be done right now. If you've made the decision out of stress or anxiety, take your time. You can always ctb when you are really ready and there is absolutely NO shame in changing your mind (btw - I am pro choice so if this sound anti ctb it's not)

Thank you for your kind words, I honestly can't say how I feel right now. My girlfriend will be calling later tn, as she always does after the gym. I don't know how I'll handle that call. It'll be just a few short hours before I head into the forest again

Hopefully it's a clear night and you can look at the stars beforehand.

Sun is setting now, will keep you posted if there are some nice stars

 

[Unattainable666]

Thank you for your kind words, I honestly can't say how I feel right now. My girlfriend will be calling later tn, as she always does after the gym. I don't know how I'll handle that call. It'll be just a few short hours before I head into the forest again

Sun is setting now, will keep you posted if there are some nice stars

Just remember what I said. Don't ctb off of an instant feeling (trust me I know what I'm saying - I've done the same thing). Think it through mentally not emotionally.

 

[zamzas]

I wish you good luck. Please keep us updated if you can / want ! I hope you can reach the end you're aiming for.

 

[Whatshouldmynamebe]

Just remember what I said. Don't ctb off of an instant feeling (trust me I know what I'm saying - I've done the same thing). Think it through mentally not emotionally.

It's definitely not an instant feeling, been planning it out for months, it's just emotionally extremely difficult

I wish you good luck. Please keep us updated if you can / want ! I hope you can reach the end you're aiming for.

That I will

 

[Whatshouldmynamebe]

Fuck I really hope I can go through with this

 

[10000DaysTooMany]

I wish you the best. I hope you find the peace you're looking for.

 

[Foreverix]

Fuck I really hope I can go through with this

I'll be up for a bit and I'm watching this thread if it helps you feel a little less alone. If you need to talk, I'll be here.

 

[Whatshouldmynamebe]

Feeling calmer now, still alot of guilt. Especially for my girlfriend, god I hope she can forgive me and continue to live her life

Hopefully it's a clear night and you can look at the stars beforehand.

The stars are out

 

[tora]

you're doing it tonight? I'm leaving tonight too. and honestly I'm terrified. I hope everything goes as planned for you, and I hope it's painless and peaceful

 

[absolutelyyou]

I'm so sorry life has pushed you to this point, I hope you find and know peace.

 

[locked*n*loaded]

If you go through with it, I hope you get to your peace. If you don't go through with it tonight, that's OK, too, and still hope you get to some peace.

 

[FuneralCry]

I wish you the best of luck with your plans and I hope that you find the freedom you are searching for.

 

[Praestat_Mori]

I wish you all the best, I hope you find peace, safe travels!

 

[アホペンギン]

I wish you the best with your plans and hopefully you have a smooth transition. :)

 

[Whatshouldmynamebe]

I couldn't go through with it I took the pain killers, prop, benzos and AE and just couldn't get myself to drink it this time, I was pretty loopy by the time I was supposed to be drinking it.

Lots of anxiety this morning and regret, really wish I had just gone and done it

 

[felixwasabsurd]

The pain I'll be leaving behind with my girlfriend and family

Leave a note tell them what's on your mind, that they are not at fault here and make sure they are separate letters, they will want to keep it.
I hope your parting is peaceful

 

[Whatshouldmynamebe]

I couldn't go through with it I took the pain killers, prop, benzos and AE and just couldn't get myself to drink it this time, I was pretty loopy by the time I was supposed to be drinking it.

Lots of anxiety this morning and regret, really wish I had just gone and done it

I was in my tent and my laptop died aswell and I really wanted something distracting me at the time

 

[Foreverix]

I was in my tent and my laptop died aswell and I really wanted something distracting me at the time

No shame. Thanks for updating. How are you doing now? I'm sure you feel low, but again, you're not alone. We struggle with you.