Ten threads we haven't seen yet but probably will soon:

[Berlin76]

Fuck, life is unreal

#218 View attachment 30274
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/ar...-dies-getting-stuck-grinder-hummus-plant.html

(Lord, I'm sorry I laughed, don't let me be misunderstood)

#219 want to die because i ate hummes last night and saw a post about a men who lost his arm during processing hummes. Should i take meto or domperidon

 

[DyslexicForeigner]

#220 Can you CTB by choking on toilet paper?

Yes, it is possible to CTB by choking on toilet paper, and here's the proof:

https://journals.lww.com/amjforensi...g_on_Toilet_Paper__An_Unusual_Case_of.17.aspx

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

#220 Can you CTB by choking on Toilet paper?

If only we could ask this kid's parents...

https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/toilet-paper-megathread.35541/post-667764

If only we could ask this kid's parents...

https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/toilet-paper-megathread.35541/post-667764

P.S. I always recommend starting with a site search.

 

[DyslexicForeigner]

If only we could ask this kid's parents...

https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/toilet-paper-megathread.35541/post-667764

P.S. I always recommend starting with a site search.

Thank you so much

 

[enjolras]

The surging demand was us ?

Toilet Paper Token Wipe Paper - CoinMarketCap Blog

CoinMarketCap's Toilet Paper Token is a digital asset that aims to rescue humanity from a toilet paper shortage in the time of Corona Virus (COVID-19).

blog.coinmarketcap.com

Let's claim a spot on the pyramid of merits

 

[STK]

#221 [Venting] Made SN cookies but family packed them for a picnic. How my CTB day is being ruined

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

#222 Buying COVID-infected items on the dark web

 

[faust]

#223 Using a choker for a night-night method
#224 Tesla coil for CTB
#225 How to take a mortgage before CTB and sell the house half price
#226 Liberation in front of Statue of Liberty (tautology, I know)
#227 Laxative overdose
#228 Inhaling the black mold
#229 Forklift CTB

 

[enjolras]

#230 How to CTB when I reincarnate into an "indestructible" Tardigrade drifting in space ?

Spoiler

Time to poop your pants

 

[avoid_slow_death]

@GoodPersonEffed
#19 Would shooting in the ass be as fatal as in the head?

Depends on how far one's head is stuck up there!

And as a bonus question for those into theoretical physics:

Is teleportation technically suicide?

 

[faust]

Depends on how far one's head is stuck up there!

And as a bonus question for those into theoretical physics:

Is teleportation technically suicide?

I associate teleportation with GHB or flunitrazepam. You take alcohol, then one of these substances on top and enjoy the blackout. Wake up in a strange place in strange circumstances.

 

[enjolras]

#231 Wifey confiscated N, now serves coffee in the morning. Under a blue balls vendetta, HELP

Google Translate

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

#232 Do I need meto for this method?

 

[134340]

@fightingsioux, are you experiencing a wee little bit of burnout/compassion fatigue?

Sadly I don't have anything to contribute but compassion fatigue is the absolute best way of putting it!! Glad to know I'm not the only one experiencing it right now

 

[Suez]

#31 Do I have to OD on bath salts in the bathtub? I only have a shower :(

OMG you guys i havent laughed so much in a long time. Keep it up, absolutely hillarious, i luv it :)

 

[verminoid]

#230 How to CTB when I reincarnate into an "indestructible" Tardigrade drifting in space ?

View attachment 31285

i love a good tardigrade but their "faces" look like lil assholes squirting out an atom sized turd

#233 (method) no suspension hanging

 

[enjolras]

#233 (method) no suspension hanging

#234 Zero gravity hanging inside the International Space Station

 

[Epsilon0]

#234 Zero gravity hanging inside the International Space Station

The best one so far
Congrats!!!

 

[jgm63]

#235 Is it possible to combine *ALL* CTB methods into one MEGA METHOD ?
It shall be known as the "MEGA CTB DOUBLE WHOPPER MOTHER-FUNKSTER".

Keep an eye out for it on the partners thread soon......

Gender : Male
Age : 32
Location : Lala land
Method : MCDWMF

 

[ghostlysoap]

What will happen if I swallow an active grenade but I don't pull the string?

Will my neighbour shoot me if I trespass into his property at night?

Will it work if a fat lady sat on me?

 

[InTheAirTonight]

#236 I want to skin myself alive, it it peaceful?

 

[jgm63]

#234 Zero gravity hanging inside the International Space Station

Genius....
"Hey, this doesn't seem to be working...."

 

[enjolras]

#237 [Method] Holy water coupled to direct sunlight

Spoiler

OP : 1824yo supernatural creature, awfully incompetent at dying ! #359 attempt failures sucking SN infected blood of well dressed, groomed, with pale skin tone women. I admit it : my biggest fear is to be immortal (just second to garlic bread at breakfast). Coffin already at disposal for the funerals.

Spoiler

Me, desperate ever again

 

[LastRide]

#238 I want to emulate Christ and crucify myself - how can I nail my last hand to the cross if I have no more hand left to use the hammer? And how long do you think it will take to die? Anyone has experience with this since 200 AD???

 

[DyslexicForeigner]

#238 I want to emulate Christ and crucify myself - how can I nail my last hand to the cross if I have no more hand left to use the hammer? And how long do you think it will take to die? Anyone has experience with this since 200 AD???

Very easy... Just summon up the aerial infant Jeffery or the censored black box Not-Muhammad and ask them to do that for ya!

#239 Who the fuck is the patient zero of COVID-19 in Wuhan that spreads the virus across the globe and kills so many people? Are the deceased victims of Coronavirus willing to tell us via mediumship?

 

[LastRide]

#236 I want to skin myself alive, it it peaceful?

Start with your toe and see how it goes !

 

[I’mDone]

Will it work if a fat lady sat on me?

Only if she sings. Then it's all over.

 

[DyslexicForeigner]

#240 Is SN corpse traumatizing enough or should I go with the old school hanging method?

 

[enjolras]

#241 Training to hold my breathe to trigger unconsciousness on command. I have a dream of Feng Shui SN.

#242 Training to breathe into Helium party balloons to faint on command

I blame it on the SN+Nitrogen combo which lacked ambition.

Considered, this thread can be an outlet for public health.

 

[Fml]

#36 If I sit on a giant dildo with all my weight, can it break my brain stem? Suicide by dildo anyone?

Sounds like a mighty fun way to go!