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Bulldogbitch

Bulldogbitch

Lifes a bitch, so am I
Feb 12, 2020
85
Do you think logically suicide is selfish. I'm trying to look at it from two angles.
1- myself
2- family/friends/pets etc
 
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Suicidebydeath

Suicidebydeath

No chances to be happy - dead inside
Nov 25, 2021
3,558
1- no
2- no (as long you made sure pets wouldn't starve after you're gone etc ofc)

"" Saying suicide is selfish is saying, "Although I don't understand clinical depression & suicide I'm going to judge people who die from it even if causes unimaginable pain + trauma and stigmatizes mental illness because it makes me feel better + safer." ""

Some people would love to tell you it is, because they love guilt-tripping suicidal people into staying alive.
 
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H

Hope:-)

Enlightened
Jul 3, 2022
1,120
I think saying that is just a way for people to take their s@@@ out on vulnerable people...as per usual.
 
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I

Idontmatter

Just want it all to be over
Oct 25, 2021
647
No and no. I cringe when I hear someone say it's selfish. Some people just don't take the time to understand it.
 
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SCW

SCW

Member
Aug 21, 2022
17
No more selfish than being forced to live a life you don't want because of other people's feelings on the matter.
 
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👁

👁️👃👁️

Enlightened
Aug 14, 2022
1,292
I mean they can try saying that it's selfish in a sense that we're going to leave so much pain behind. In that caae maybe it is selfish of me. I just can't make it through anymore though. The suffering is to much. I know it's going to cause them to suffer as well and I feel bad about that. People are going to say that I took the easy way out and I'm a coward.. who am I to try to take the easy way out while everyone else is still suffering. Idk. I do know one thing if it's selfish it will be the last selfish thing that I do. 🤷
 
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Bulldogbitch

Bulldogbitch

Lifes a bitch, so am I
Feb 12, 2020
85
I mean they can try saying that it's selfish in a sense that we're going to leave so much pain behind. In that caae maybe it is selfish of me. I just can't make it through anymore though. The suffering is to much. I know it's going to cause them to suffer as well and I feel bad about that. People are going to say that I took the easy way out and I'm a coward.. who am I to try to take the easy way out while everyone else is still suffering. Idk. I do know one thing if it's selfish it will be the last selfish thing that I do. 🤷
It's not an easy way out, our bodies are made for self preservation, which makes it harder
 
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M

Muach

Member
Jan 28, 2022
54
Do you think logically suicide is selfish. I'm trying to look at it from two angles.
1- myself
2- family/friends/pets etc
Fuck them all who think suicide is selfish; those are self-centered people who think the world revolves only around them including our lives; which do not.

The most selfish i consider are parents who bring souls to their selfish, vain needs. I don't recollect anybody asking my will to come to this shitty, corrupt world.

So don't hold me responsible or i will hold them responsible for my suicide. How about that???
 
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Idoe.know

Idoe.know

Member
Aug 11, 2022
13
No and no. I think it's much more selfish to force someone to stay alive when they wish to exit.
 
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R

ropegirl

Member
Aug 20, 2022
7
My answer might not be popular but I think it's more a case of who you are leaving behind. I do think it is selfish of someone to take their life if it involves leaving small children (under the age of sixteen - at least) without a parent. I think if someone has committed to having children then they are obligated to look after that child - as best they can - until that child is of adult age.
 
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Bulldogbitch

Bulldogbitch

Lifes a bitch, so am I
Feb 12, 2020
85
Fuck them all who think suicide is selfish; those are self-centered people who think the world revolves only around them including our lives; which do not.

The most selfish i consider are parents who bring souls to their selfish, vain needs. I don't recollect anybody asking my will to come to this shitty, corrupt world.

So don't hold me responsible or i will hold them responsible for my suicide. How about that???
That's very true👍
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
42,615
Of course if someone decides to leave this world then it would be painful for those left behind, but there is nothing actually wrong with suicide. It's a human right and a personal decision and nobody else should have any say in it. We have no obligations to stay alive as we did not ask to exist. Nobody should be forced to live against their wishes. After all, we will all die eventually someday so there's nothing wrong with someone deciding to exit at a time of their own choosing. To me it's preferable to exit when the time is right for me rather than it being out of my control.
 
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F

Forever Sleep

Earned it we have...
May 4, 2022
11,740
I guess selfishness is putting your own needs above anyone elses- it's usually linked to gaining things when you think about it- the definition is:

concerned excessively or exclusively with oneself : seeking or concentrating on one's own advantage, pleasure, or well-being without regard for others

On the one hand- the person who has committed suicide has put their needs first and they will likely leave the pain of grief behind. However- I don't think it is an utterly selfish act. I expect most people do deeply consider how it will affect the people around them. I suspect many even try to hang on for the closest ones to pass before they ctb. Plus- people aren't commiting suicide to really gain anything- they are doing it to escape the pain of a life they simply can't bear anymore.

Like many other people have said- I believe it's much more selfish to try and hang on to a living thing that is suffering more than it can cope with.
 
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GlassAlwaysEmpty

GlassAlwaysEmpty

Red Grapes only
Jun 22, 2020
110
I've seen first hand what a suicide does to a family, and It's devestating.
But forcing someone to live who really doesn't want to is also very selfish.
 
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G

Gemini

Member
Aug 21, 2022
10
There is no easy answer to this question, especially the second angle. But I think if the answer to the first angle is that you really wish to commit suicide, then it nullifies whatever the answer is to the second angle. So, no, it is not selfish I would say.
 
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hellispink

hellispink

poisonous
May 26, 2022
1,229
Suicide is an act of self love and compassion. Unless the family members can fix the emptiness and all the problems personally and financially that one can have, they shouldn't even have an opinion on it. How others perceive death is none of my business. We are all responsible to make peace with death. Most people see it as something tragic that shouldn't happen. It is on them to change that perspective and understand that death itself is an act of liberation and peace. It is not the dead that lives who suffers, suffering only exists in this plane. I understand it is hard to let go but if we can't help someone, we must support their decision to leave. If someone wants to die or does stuff that harm their own safety because of their own choice, I wouldn't even think of begging them not to do that. Because it is their choice, the freedom of choosing one's destiny. If they can't handle it, they are welcome to come along with us. After all, this world is disgusting by all means so it doesn't matter. Life for me has no value whatsoever, we born slaves to different type of systems. Whoever ignores the fact is daydreaming.
 
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Lullaby

Lullaby

🌙
Mar 9, 2022
682
I guess it depends on the person. I choose to live for my cat because I love him more than anyhting in this world and don't trust anyone else with him, I would rather go after he does.

But I usually think it's pretty selfish for someone to say you have to stick around for another person. You're not born into this world to live for anyone else, it's your life. I'm lucky enough to have not experienced the loss of a loved one yet, and I don't doubt that it's emotionally crippling...but I just can't agree with the thought anymore that you have to put up with what you're struggling with, be it a mental or physicall illness, to make someone esle happy.
 
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Wayfaerer

Wayfaerer

JFMSUF
Aug 21, 2019
1,938
Maybe it is but we live in a selfish world and I'm sure most people here have been let down by selfish individuals. To put it simply: I don't care and not my problem.
 
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stoiccactus

stoiccactus

somehow still here
Mar 24, 2022
254
I've thought a lot about this and listened to a lot of arguments about why suicide is selfish. I've found most of the arguments unconvincing and usually made by people who were partially responsible for the person committing suicide to begin with. Lots of "suicide is selfish because now I'm stuck doing the work" kind of takes out there by people that were abusive to begin with.
 
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wljourney

wljourney

Waiting for the bus
Apr 2, 2022
1,419
Well, very simplified:
it's selfish to put your needs before others.
HOWEVER, we all do that on a daily basis.
When we compete for work, for food, for attention, housing etc.

So, if CTBing ends me living in agony, but puts others in pain, whose needs do you choose to fulfill. How long do you hold on for others?
When do you reach a point where it's ok to put your own needs first?

Is it selfish? Probably.
But is it morally wrong to be selfish? No, I don't think is is. Especially if you don't have kids/dependants.
 
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Euthanza

Euthanza

Self Righteous Suicide
Jun 9, 2022
1,446
1. No, self sacrifice is never selfish.
2. Not selfish, but they can judge my dead corpse

It's just another stupid stigma people put when claiming they help without understanding or contemplating the detail of circumstances.
 
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theboy

theboy

Illuminated
Jul 15, 2022
3,121
I've seen first hand what a suicide does to a family, and It's devestating.
But forcing someone to live who really doesn't want to is also very selfish.
could you tell me what happened? If it is possible to know, of course.
 
B

bloos

Member
Aug 6, 2022
18
Selfish? Yes. Is being selfish wrong? Maybe. Is everyone selfish? Yes.
I prefer to view it as a form of self care, for my situation.
 
nosurpries

nosurpries

Member
Jul 3, 2022
97
suicide is not selfish
 
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GlassAlwaysEmpty

GlassAlwaysEmpty

Red Grapes only
Jun 22, 2020
110
could you tell me what happened? If it is possible to know, of course.
A younger sister of mine took her life. I don't consider what she did as selfish though, but it was obviously very devastating to the family as a whole.
 
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theboy

theboy

Illuminated
Jul 15, 2022
3,121
A younger sister of mine took her life. I don't consider what she did as selfish though, but it was obviously very devastating to the family as a whole.
Oh my condolences to your family
With what happened to you, what do you think about this forum? What changed before and after in your life when your sister did CTB?
hugs for you
 
Tiberius85

Tiberius85

Member
Aug 21, 2022
77
Suicide is an inherently selfish act - which doesn't mean it's wrong. But it focuses solely on oneself, with disregard for anything and anyone else. I don't see necessarily a negative connotation in this. Because ultimately in any case, regardless of the way we die, we always die on our own. Nobody can die our death for us. In that context suicide may be selfish, but it's a personal decision after all, the assertion of control about oneself. I don't see this as something wrong.
 
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C

chloramine

Mage
Apr 18, 2022
504
The goal is suicide is not to harm others (usually). That can be a byproduct for sure and I think it's important we acknowledge that. I think a lot of it comes down to how you define selfishness. Because if it's any action that benefits person A and hurts person B then yes suicide is selfish under those conditions. Personally I think of selfishness more as when the reason the action helps person A is that it harms person B. For example if I stole money from a friend I would be directly benefiting from their loss. If you moved away to pursue a better career and that made your friends and family sad, most people wouldn't label that as selfish. Having someone you care about die is more traumatic than them moving away and I don't want to dismiss or minimize that, but the general idea is there.

Life also has more nuance than this. I wouldn't say it's selfish to commit suicide, but I'd say it's selfish to do so without making sure there are plans for your pet (if you have one). Making sure it won't starve or be tossed out to the streets. Because that's a creature that's totally reliant on you and thus you have a certain level of responsibility. Even then the selfish part isn't suicide specifically.

There are some people who use suicide as a means to hurt others and that feels iffy to me- I also don't know their situation though, so even then I don't feel comfortable judging. For most people they're taking an action to escape pain that has unfortunate consequences. They are not seeking out or benefiting from the potential pain.
 
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E

Escapee

Student
Jan 14, 2023
163
My answer might not be popular but I think it's more a case of who you are leaving behind. I do think it is selfish of someone to take their life if it involves leaving small children (under the age of sixteen - at least) without a parent. I think if someone has committed to having children then they are obligated to look after that child - as best they can - until that child is of adult age.

No there is no way I can agree with you. I have no kids. But even If I had I know I can't live on like this just to be there for them not because I don't care about them because the main reason why many of us are going to ctb is because we literally can't endure life anymore. It isn't an option you can make. So it depends on whY you want to ctb in the first place.
 

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