I would to explain that non-existence is all I wished for, I'd explain how I've only ever wished for peace from this existence I always saw as the most cruel, terrible tragedy. To me existence itself really is the true problem as it's the source of all suffering and I just don't want to suffer in any way, I wish to be permanently unconscious for all eternity, I'd always prefer to not exist than suffer for potentially decades longer just to be tortured by old age.