Discussion Suicide note?

[Thinking]

I know there have been other posts similar to this but I wanted to elaborate on my specific thoughts:

I want to write a note because I don't want my family wondering why I ctb and I do love them. But I'm not sure what to talk about. I'm not sure I want to say WHY I'm going to ctb because I don't want them to blame themselves for my feelings. I know they will blame themselves anyway but I want to minimize this.

Any suggestions or thoughts?

 

[BitterlyAlive]

I wrote why I was doing it as well as how I've tried to hang on but just couldn't do it anymore. But my reasons why are very general and don't involve other people. I only say that because I know a lot of people are suicidal because of past traumas, abuse, etc. :/

 

[BPD Barbie]

I'd just say how much you love them and re-enforce this over and over. Maybe touch lightly on the subject why so they aren't left wondering but don't go into great detail. Notes are hard to write and highly personal.

 

[VIBRITANNIA]

like barbie said, affirmations that your ctb wasn't their fault and you loved them. also, maybe mentioning why (not in depth) will help, and that what happened isn't their fault.

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

I'm confused. Why would they blame themselves for your feelings if they're not to blame for the reason why?

You have the right to your privacy, though. You can tell them that the reasons are personal, assure them they have nothing to do with the reasons, and that you have compassion for their wondering and not having the answer, but that it's your right to keep it to yourself.

 

[failedjedi]

I just tried my best in my note to make my mom understand. It wasn't about explaining the reasons, although I did try to a little, it was more about understanding. Understanding that I need this to happen. Understanding how much I'm suffering. I just want my mom to understand and accept it that's all.

 

[drowningcarcass]

I'm confused. Why would they blame themselves for your feelings if they're not to blame for the reason why?

You have the right to your privacy, though. You can tell them that the reasons are personal, assure them they have nothing to do with the reasons, and that you have compassion for their wondering and not having the answer, but that it's your right to keep it to yourself.

People will carry the guilt no matter how easy you try to make it. They will think they could have done more, that there was something they didn't do that could have saved you, and they will hate themselves for not being able to prevent it. The guilt becomes easier to bear, but it does take up residence in your bones, and no words make it easier. Even if they are not to blame, they will find a way to make themselves at fault. It is a part of grief, and of human nature itself.
I'd just tell them that you love them. Tell them that you love them, and that there wasn't anything they could have done, and that you're sorry for the pain that you will cause them. My advice isn't great, because I don't really have a family, but I feel like that is important to stress - that they couldn't have done anything for you. That way there is a bit of pressure taken off of the "I should have done something to save them" piece that nestles in after a loved one's departure.

 

[Smellanie]

I don't know if you necessarily need to explain why. It depends on the people you're writing to. If you love them and they love you they will probably appreciate it. If you don't feel loved then it's probably not worth it, they would have reached out if they cared. I used to not want to write a note but now I'm thinking of just writing something like "it's not your fault, dont open the door, call the police. I'm sorry" Idk maybe warning them to not look at the body (espcially if you use a gun) might sliiiightly help their mental state.

 

[nitroautnz]

Lots of opinions, but like the most of the people I would say to be honest, you dont have to give details about the reason if you think they can feel bad, but say that no matter what that would have happen, you couldnt bear to live anymore and they couldnt do anything about it because it's not their fault.

I'm currently trying to write one too, but it's hard I know that.