Suicide could never be tragic

[FuneralCry]

I sometimes read people saying that suicide is tragic but the reality is that it could never be. Saying that suicide is a tragic act suggests that it's a negative thing for someone to leave this world at a time of their own choosing and that it should have been prevented.

There is nothing actually sad about someone leaving this world for the person that has died, but for those who are left behind, death, grief and loss are all inevitable in life and are a consequence of choosing to bring someone into this life. The true tragic thing is how humans continue to procreate, creating humans that will inevitability endure lives filled with suffering and will have to struggle in finding ways to leave this life behind. It's sad how life is even a thing in the first place and how so much cruelty exists in this world.

All humans will die someday eventually so I see it as being better to exit at a time of my own choosing rather than leaving at a time out of my control. Suicide is not tragic as it's a personal decision, it's an individual taking control over a life that they never asked for and is preventing a potentially more horrible death by some other cause.

I think the main reason as to why suicide is not tragic is because the non existent cannot suffer, they are at rest, they cannot experience anything and life cannot get worse for them. There is nothing sad about choosing to permanently rest, by someone choosing to ctb they are freeing themselves from all suffering. Everything that is wrong with life is finally gone.

Calling suicide tragic suggests that there is some real benefit to staying alive, but what really is the point to enduring this existence for decades until old age, with unlimited potential for suffering and problems. Even if someone was experiencing something positive (if such a thing really existed) the dead would be unable to grieve for the loss of it but to die also removes the capacity to suffer, present in all humans.

Maybe those who call it tragic doesn't understand what the suicidal person goes through, they live under delusions and don't want to accept that sometimes life is not worth living. Suicide really should be seen differently, not as a tragic act that should have been prevented but instead it should be respected as a personal choice.

 

[madebrief]

Great spokesperson for suicide.

 

[Mofreeko]

Geez FC, all I can muster thinking about this close to my ctb is who is going to feed my cat and how is my stuff going to get split up lol. You have a gift for making suicide almost poetic.

 

[watchingthewheels]

"Suicide could never be tragic."

Tell that to 4-year old me when I found my father's corpse on the floor.

 

[locked*n*loaded]

You may feel differently if you had a child who committed suicide.

 

[Forever Sleep]

I think the idea of it being tragic also encompasses the realisation that their life had been so painful that suicide seemed like their best option.

I agree that it's the poor person's life that was tragic rather than their death. Still- all death feels tragic for those left behind. Yes, it's selfish but when we love people, we miss them when they're gone- even if death was the best thing for them because they were suffering.

The simple fact that one way or another- we all have to say goodbye and get ripped apart from one another- by however means seems terribly cruel to me... and tragic. On the one hand, it seems like one hell of a design flaw but on the other- I'm massively grateful because otherwise there'd be no escape.

 

[CassieHoward]

Maybe those who call it tragic doesn't understand what the suicidal person goes through, they live under delusions and don't want to accept that sometimes life is not worth living. Suicide really should be seen differently, not as a tragic act that should have been prevented but instead it should be respected as a personal choice.

i have plenty of respect for you but you're so far off base here...

tragedy: "a very sad event or situation, especially one that involves death" (per oxford dictionary)

suicide is a personal choice, and an issue of bodily autonomy above all else. but you're completely neglecting the impact suicide has on one's loved ones. for them, it is tragic. i've lost a loved one to suicide - it hurts like a bitch. i respect their personal choice and respect they did what they felt was best, but that doesn't mean i have to be happy about it and reject the pain it causes. it doesn't mean one should be complacent and move on.

losing a loved one is sad. given our movement is a pro-choice one, you should understand full and well that how one reacts or feels about a certain event is entirely subjective, and also entirely valid. it's not up to you or anyone else to judge how one reacts to suicide.

it's disrespectful and dismissive to call those grieving such a profound loss "delusional". you're implying they have no right to be feeling how they do. you're minimizing the profound harm one's death can cause. and more than that, you're insulting anyone who has ever lost a loved one to suicide.

 

[akirat9]

i have plenty of respect for you but you're so far off base here...

tragedy: "a very sad event or situation, especially one that involves death" (per oxford dictionary)

suicide is a personal choice, and an issue of bodily autonomy above all else. but you're completely neglecting the impact suicide has on one's loved ones. for them, it is tragic. i've lost a loved one to suicide - it hurts like a bitch. i respect their personal choice and respect they did what they felt was best, but that doesn't mean i have to be happy about it and reject the pain it causes. it doesn't mean one should be complacent and move on.

losing a loved one is sad. given our movement is a pro-choice one, you should understand full and well that how one reacts or feels about a certain event is entirely subjective, and also entirely valid. it's not up to you or anyone else to judge how one reacts to suicide.

it's disrespectful and dismissive to call those grieving such a profound loss "delusional". you're implying they have no right to be feeling how they do. you're minimizing the profound harm one's death can cause. and more than that, you're insulting anyone who has ever lost a loved one to suicide.

is assume everyone has a "loved" one or anyone who cares about them, warranting this tragedy
this is no harm to one who have nobody; and yes is are people who has no one, not by mean o all family deceased but also disengage

 

[CassieHoward]

is assume everyone has a "loved" one or anyone who cares about them, warranting this tragedy
this is no harm to one who have nobody; and yes is are people who has no one, not by mean o all family deceased but also disengage

i never assumed that, no, and in fact that's pretty irrelevant to bring up.

i was responding to op who said that those hurt by suicide are delusional. if you want to support op's implication that's fine, but you should just say so.

it is entirely disrespectful to say suicide isn't tragic. maybe not in all cases, but in the majority of them, it is. op's statement is disrespectful to those who lost someone to suicide. can you provide any reasoning why it wouldn't be?

 

[akirat9]

i never assumed that, no, and in fact that's pretty irrelevant to bring up.

i was responding to op who said that those hurt by suicide are delusional. if you want to support op's implication that's fine, but you should just say so.

it is entirely disrespectful to say suicide isn't tragic. maybe not in all cases, but in the majority of them, it is. op's statement is disrespectful to those who lost someone to suicide. can you provide any reasoning why it wouldn't be?

nobody offline cares if i die
is simple.
good if you and else do, b
is tragic

 

[makethepainstop]

Suicide done correctly can be as beautiful as a bouquet of roses. If normals could understand our pain, perhaps the could feel our joy in successfully ctb. Love to all.

 

[CTB Dream]

Think many misunedrstand funeral, say not tragedy person this example real not see tragedy person suffer not see tragedy entire life cause ctb see only part, some people trauma see many pretend person not exist, tell truth example me ctb people pretend cry say tragic day day forget nobody knew tragic inside instead call ctb tragedy ignore tragedy living.

 

[Dot]

I.m.o c.t.b = persnl chce bt = nt gd tht sme ppl r drivn 2 c.t.b
Slf fght fr yrs bcse wantd 2 b wll & hve hppy lfe
Persnlly slf resent tht am drivn 2 c.t.b bcse slf nevr wantd ths
= dffrnt fr evry1

 

[Chinaski]

This assumes, as the op often does, that all suicides are ultimately equal and the numerous drivers to suicide are essentially identical, it's self-absorbed, tunnel vision stuff. Most suicides are tragic, suicide in itself is not something which should be applauded. If l ctb today there are people who will grieve for me, there are people who will be angry at the institution who relentlessly nudged me towards it, they will respect my decision and understand why it was made but will still see the event, correctly, as a tragic one. Suicide is not something to be applauded, it is absolutely possible to recognise that people have the right to choose to cease to exist it is still a tragic event when someone finds they have to make that choice.

 

[rationaltake]

You only have to read some of the posts on here to realise that there are plenty of people who desperately want to live but are actually considering suicide because they can't endure the particular circumstances of their own lives. Not everyone who considers suicide is anti-life in general and is longing to depart this realm as soon as possible.

A lot of people consider their own impending suicide tragic. Maybe those who don't see that suicide is a personal tragedy for some people are living under the delusion that nobody in the world ever enjoys anything at all under any circumstances whatsoever.

People aren't unaware that they will die or may become ill or could suffer reversals of fortune. Not everyone feels that every single positive thing is totally invalidated because nothing is permanent. People sometimes say that pleasure in certain things is heightened precisely because life is fleeting and nothing lasts - seize the day.

I agree suicide should be respected as a personal choice. But that's it. It's not up to any of us to police others' thoughts and tell people they shouldn't consider suicide tragic. If I'm allowed to act as I wish concerning my own life or death - that's good enough for me and I don't need to insist that everyone shares my personal take on things.

 

[Hope:-)]

I consider suicide tragic- a lot of people who are actively suicidal want to live and love life...they just can't put up with their circumstances anymore.

 

[Chinaski]

You only have to read some of the posts on here to realise that there are plenty of people who desperately want to live but are actually considering suicide because they can't endure the particular circumstances of their own lives. Not everyone who considers suicide is anti-life in general and is longing to depart this realm as soon as possible.

A lot of people consider their own impending suicide tragic. Maybe those who don't see that suicide is a personal tragedy for some people are living under the delusion that nobody in the world ever enjoys anything at all under any circumstances whatsoever.

People aren't unaware that they will die or may become ill or could suffer reversals of fortune. Not everyone feels that every single positive thing is totally invalidated because nothing is permanent. People sometimes say that pleasure in certain things is heightened precisely because life is fleeting and nothing lasts - seize the day.

I agree suicide should be respected as a personal choice. But that's it. It's not up to any of us to police others' thoughts and tell people they shouldn't consider suicide tragic. If I'm allowed to act as I wish concerning my own life or death - that's good enough for me and I don't need to insist that everyone shares my personal take on things.

Absolutely spot on post here imo.

 

[drmihilo]

I sometimes read people saying that suicide is tragic but the reality is that it could never be. Saying that suicide is a tragic act suggests that it's a negative thing for someone to leave this world at a time of their own choosing and that it should have been prevented.

There is nothing actually sad about someone leaving this world for the person that has died, but for those who are left behind, death, grief and loss are all inevitable in life and are a consequence of choosing to bring someone into this life. The true tragic thing is how humans continue to procreate, creating humans that will inevitability endure lives filled with suffering and will have to struggle in finding ways to leave this life behind. It's sad how life is even a thing in the first place and how so much cruelty exists in this world.

All humans will die someday eventually so I see it as being better to exit at a time of my own choosing rather than leaving at a time out of my control. Suicide is not tragic as it's a personal decision, it's an individual taking control over a life that they never asked for and is preventing a potentially more horrible death by some other cause.

I think the main reason as to why suicide is not tragic is because the non existent cannot suffer, they are at rest, they cannot experience anything and life cannot get worse for them. There is nothing sad about choosing to permanently rest, by someone choosing to ctb they are freeing themselves from all suffering. Everything that is wrong with life is finally gone.

Calling suicide tragic suggests that there is some real benefit to staying alive, but what really is the point to enduring this existence for decades until old age, with unlimited potential for suffering and problems. Even if someone was experiencing something positive (if such a thing really existed) the dead would be unable to grieve for the loss of it but to die also removes the capacity to suffer, present in all humans.

Maybe those who call it tragic doesn't understand what the suicidal person goes through, they live under delusions and don't want to accept that sometimes life is not worth living. Suicide really should be seen differently, not as a tragic act that should have been prevented but instead it should be respected as a personal choice.

You've written it out very well.

 

[SarRy]

I mean, it can be tragic in a sort of Greek play sort of way. Yes, suicide is not great for the people left behind, but it is selfish to ask someone to suffer just to make you a little happier. I think most people are pushed over the edge by thinking they're a burden. It's almost funny how people only care when you're gone. They'll watch you struggle, cut you out of their lives, and mock you. Then when you die everyone acts shocked. It's like people telling the family at a funeral "If you need anything, just ask." They never mean it.

 

[FuneralCry]

I know that many people don't actually want to die but they feel as though they have no choice because of what they are going through and I get that it can be devastating for them, but to me in this case life is the thing that is tragic rather than suicide. I don't understand how anyone could want to live at all, but I know that those people suffer as once they had a life they saw as being satisfying and it was taken away from them, it's the cruelty and unfairness of life that is the problem, it's tragic how life can cause people to suffer so extremely and suicide stops all of the negative emotions and experiences so to me that is not the tragic thing, life is instead, but other people can see things differently. I personally don't see death as being sad as it's simply inevitable for us all and the thought of being dead is very comforting to me.


In my post I was meaning that I think that suicide is never tragic for the person who ctb, as they cannot suffer anymore. I get that it can be devastating and upsetting losing someone, and I didn't mean that people who are struggling with grief are delusional, loss can be something very painful that people never get over.

Often in the media when suicide is called tragic it gives off this impression that suicide is something that should and could have been prevented, and that the person who ctb missed out in so much in life because they decided to leave this world. Many people don't understand what suicidal people go through at all and these are the ones who are often delusional, they live under delusions that staying alive for as long as possible is always beneficial and they don't want to accept the fact that life really can be so awful and not worth living for many people as this will shatter their worldview.

 

[HoneyandGlass]

I think suicide is tragic in that for anyone to get to this point through traumatic experiences or any circumstances really have endured so much pain and feel unable to continue with life. That is deeply sad. It is tragic that a person feels the only way to end suffering is to die. We say sorry to those who share their stories or say goodbye. We say sorry that things have got to this point. Surely, if it wasn't sad, tragic, in some form then we wouldn't be feeling bad for that person and saying sorry that they have been through so much and find themselves at the point of suicide.

 

[newave3]

I mean, it can be tragic in a sort of Greek play sort of way. Yes, suicide is not great for the people left behind, but it is selfish to ask someone to suffer just to make you a little happier. I think most people are pushed over the edge by thinking they're a burden. It's almost funny how people only care when you're gone. They'll watch you struggle, cut you out of their lives, and mock you. Then when you die everyone acts shocked. It's like people telling the family at a funeral "If you need anything, just ask." They never mean it.

Underneath it all, everyone is a self absorbed phony.

 

[RainAndSadness]

I don't think we're gonna find a common consensus on this topic. Personally, I think the circumstances that lead to suicide are definitely tragic. In my case that's my past trauma, my medical conditions, gender dysphoria, trans-related discrimination, financial struggles, you name it... these are all things that contribute to my suffering - but for me suicide itself is an empowering act to set an end to said suffering. It's a way out, sometimes it's the only way out. Not all problems have a solution. That's how I view it at least. I wouldn't be in my position if I thought suicide is inherently tragic. That's why I believe the key to battling suicide is making society a better place and not "suicide prevention" as we know it right now. We could do so much more to prevent suicide but it has to go further than just preventing "suicide" because that doesn't reduce anyones suffering, in the worst case we just prolong it, you know what I mean? We need to prevent the suffering that causes people to think about suicide as their only way out and there is a lot we can do about that. For example, as a trans woman, I have a long list of things we could improve that would reduce the trans suicide attempt rate. We commit suicide because society is actively erasing, exluding and discriminating us and we don't get the necessary medical care we need - we just can't afford it and health care providers are pretending they don't have blood on their hands when they refuse to greenlight important trans-affirming treatments. The problem is: nobody is listening to us and substantial, meaningful action is very often inconvenient to people who are in power, people who could lead change. And it's expensive. That's why I think we need to end capitalism because real suicide prevention can't work in a world where everything has a price tag and in which greed and profit are more important than human lives. I'm dealing with it right now, my own health insurance is stubborn as fuck when it comes to very important procedures that would allievate my suffering. It's just a matter of time until I'm done fighting.

I think suicide is a valid option for those that had enough - and you alone decide if you've reached that point yet. For me suicide is a human right. Rights ususally benefit people but it can harm them too. In the end it depends on the circumstances of every single person that decides to take their own life and if they - themselves - value their suicide a tragedy. I'll consider my suicide a middle finger to everyone who stood in my way, to everyone who contributed in some way to my death, to everyone who increased my suffering. And for me it's gonna be an empowering act, taking matters into my own hand to end decades of trauma and pain. For me it's gonna be the happy end that I deserved and that I needed for so long.

So yeah, that's my point of view, I hope it brings some nuance into this topic.

 

[makethepainstop]

Yep people always promise help, then fail to deliver.

 

[ge0rge]

This assumes, as the op often does, that all suicides are ultimately equal and the numerous drivers to suicide are essentially identical, it's self-absorbed, tunnel vision stuff. Most suicides are tragic, suicide in itself is not something which should be applauded. If l ctb today there are people who will grieve for me, there are people who will be angry at the institution who relentlessly nudged me towards it, they will respect my decision and understand why it was made but will still see the event, correctly, as a tragic one. Suicide is not something to be applauded, it is absolutely possible to recognise that people have the right to choose to cease to exist it is still a tragic event when someone finds they have to make that choice.

You only have to read some of the posts on here to realise that there are plenty of people who desperately want to live but are actually considering suicide because they can't endure the particular circumstances of their own lives. Not everyone who considers suicide is anti-life in general and is longing to depart this realm as soon as possible.

A lot of people consider their own impending suicide tragic. Maybe those who don't see that suicide is a personal tragedy for some people are living under the delusion that nobody in the world ever enjoys anything at all under any circumstances whatsoever.

People aren't unaware that they will die or may become ill or could suffer reversals of fortune. Not everyone feels that every single positive thing is totally invalidated because nothing is permanent. People sometimes say that pleasure in certain things is heightened precisely because life is fleeting and nothing lasts - seize the day.

I agree suicide should be respected as a personal choice. But that's it. It's not up to any of us to police others' thoughts and tell people they shouldn't consider suicide tragic. If I'm allowed to act as I wish concerning my own life or death - that's good enough for me and I don't need to insist that everyone shares my personal take on things.

gorgeous takes. revitalizing. if I didn't want to die I'd say these two posts gave me back 10 years of my life