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brokensea

brokensea

Arcanist
Aug 4, 2022
405
Does anyone else feel a lot of apathy being suicidal?

I in some sense feel bad for a couple people who may be sad if I die but for the most part I don't feel much.

I have 0 tolerance anymore. My brother was texting me and being a hole as usual and I said he was F'n stupid and have a nice life and blocked him. I just don't care to put up with anything anymore.

I never see anyone or go anywhere. I find I don't care much about anything anymore. I feel numb and dead inside and I don't have a lot of empathy for anyone.

I have many days I feel nothing just a hollow emptiness. Like my emotions are just gone.

I find myself slacking off at work at home because I just don't have the energy to work and I don't care if I get fired.

Does anyone else feel apathetic?
 
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Ginnn

Ginnn

Student
Aug 20, 2022
123
I have also lost almost all my empathy for my family, although I never had much for them
 
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H

Hope:-)

Enlightened
Jul 3, 2022
1,120
It's hard to keep your mind on suicide and everyday life at the time. Since I am more committed to suicide than I am to everyday life, everyday life has fallen by the wayside. The only thing that can get me out the house this week is trying to get meds for my ctb method. I do food shopping online so I don't have to go shopping. I don't go and buy new clothes when I need them. I have stopped eating out of constant anxiety about ctb. It's like living as a condemned woman. :-/
 
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brokensea

brokensea

Arcanist
Aug 4, 2022
405
It's hard to keep your mind on suicide and everyday life at the time. Since I am more committed to suicide than I am to everyday life, everyday life has fallen by the wayside. The only thing that can get me out the house this week is trying to get meds for my ctb method. I do food shopping online so I don't have to go shopping. I don't go and buy new clothes when I need them. I have stopped eating out of constant anxiety about ctb. It's like living as a condemned woman. :-/
That makes a lot of sense. You focus so much on suicide that regular life seems unimportant.

I buy all my food, everything online too.
 
Fadeawaaaay

Fadeawaaaay

Visionary
Nov 12, 2021
2,160
My apathy is total … I've quit but am still here for some reason
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
42,603
I can feel like that. I just get so tired and don't have much energy and in general living doesn't interest me. Me staying alive is so pointless and I just try to pass the time until I fall asleep. It's probably common for suicidal people to feel like this.
 
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O

outrider567

Visionary
Apr 5, 2022
2,826
Does anyone else feel a lot of apathy being suicidal?

I in some sense feel bad for a couple people who may be sad if I die but for the most part I don't feel much.

I have 0 tolerance anymore. My brother was texting me and being a hole as usual and I said he was F'n stupid and have a nice life and blocked him. I just don't care to put up with anything anymore.

I never see anyone or go anywhere. I find I don't care much about anything anymore. I feel numb and dead inside and I don't have a lot of empathy for anyone.

I have many days I feel nothing just a hollow emptiness. Like my emotions are just gone.

I find myself slacking off at work at home because I just don't have the energy to work and I don't care if I get fired.

Does anyone else feel apathetic?
Apathy? check! Lack of Empathy? check!(aside from my dying brother)
 
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brokensea

brokensea

Arcanist
Aug 4, 2022
405
I can feel like that. I just get so tired and don't have much energy and in general living doesn't interest me. Me staying alive is so pointless and I just try to pass the time until I fall asleep. It's probably common for suicidal people to feel like this.
Yes, I imagine so. There's so much pain you just completely shut down and can't feel anything anymore.
 
sapphoslastpoem

sapphoslastpoem

Student
Jun 23, 2022
111
I've become like this. I'm not sure if it's because I'm suicidal or if it's a result of my trauma and how people have treated me. I've lost all hope to find good people who have good intentions, I've lost any feelings of happiness or empathy when thinking about interacting with people
 
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freedompass

freedompass

Warlock
Jan 27, 2021
768
Yup. I can relate. I don't care about world events or doing good in the world and mostly just want to be left alone.
 
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brokensea

brokensea

Arcanist
Aug 4, 2022
405
I've become like this. I'm not sure if it's because I'm suicidal or if it's a result of my trauma and how people have treated me. I've lost all hope to find good people who have good intentions, I've lost any feelings of happiness or empathy when thinking about interacting with people
I could have typed this myself. I feel 100 percent the same way.
Yup. I can relate. I don't care about world events or doing good in the world and mostly just want to be left alone.
That's how I feel too. Someone said to me think of all the good you can do in the world it's like I don't care. That's all I've done my whole life is good things for other people and I can't get a scrap of good fortune for myself I'm done. I have done enough good things in this life already. It's exhausting even thinking of giving more. I have nothing left.
 
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