stupid vent sorry

[sadstuffie]

so I was super excited to go to this hello kitty event tomorrow with my gf, but she spontaneously broke up with me last night despite her saying only 3 days ago that she loved me so much & wanted to work on things.
It just hurts that I was so excited for this & now she has chosen to ruin it. it's going to be so fucking sad.
I am thinking really hard about whether I want to just buy my SN tonight & die once it finally gets here, no more painful life. I cant decide.
life has felt meaningless for months anyway. even if she were to reconsider, she has physically & emotionally abused me the whole 2 years we've been together so i just cant win. my body hurts so much right now from the chronic pain I experience also & I just want it all to stop. I want to stab myself in the head so this headache will leave. idk sorry for long post,, just need some comfort I guess. i feel like I mean nothing to anyone. no one has ever loved me since I was a child & love is all I want. well I give up. will debate on buying SN today all day long. any advice is very much appreciated, thank you for always being here guys.

 

[shy]

Your girlfriend breaking up with you hurts right now, but it might have opened up for a bunch of opportunities. Who knows what other people can enter your life now, that she has given up her spot. I hope that things don't look too gloomy and that you can still enjoy your event, even if it's just a little bit.

 

[Deleted member 23009]

As stated above yeah it will hurt right now. But seeing as she's been abusive towards you for 2 years seems like you're better off without her. It sounds really shitty of her to do that though, i'm sorry for that..

Don't apologize for venting, we're all here for you. Whatever you decide to do we'll support you! But my advice is to try think about it a bit and give it some time and not do anything rash you might not want, at least plan things. Feel free to vent or dm if you want to talk about whatever. I hope you'll find peace in whatever way you decide to. Hugs and love to you

 

[Deleted member 17949]

It's not stupid. Say what you need to say, feelings are valid.

 

[bornfree]

such is a little bit of hope then more hopelessness. I feel for you.

 

[Symbiote]

I call that a win, if she physically and emotionally abused you for two years during the entire relationship. Then you can wash that mess off, go to the Hello Kitty convention and meet a fellow feline to be friends with. Be free, go nuts, and embrace being out of that relationship.

 

[Ghost2211]

Hey friend, coming out of an abusive relationship hurts. It should feel like freedom... it should feel good, but it doesn't... it hurts. Give yourself a few days to process the rollercoaster of your abuser going away. Even when it makes you angry, cry, feel lonely or lost it does get better over time. Every day is one day away. Remind yourself why they were bad for you, and do things to support yourself. Reach out if you need to talk.

 

[sadstuffie]

Hey friend, coming out of an abusive relationship hurts. It should feel like freedom... it should feel good, but it doesn't... it hurts. Give yourself a few days to process the rollercoaster of your abuser going away. Even when it makes you angry, cry, feel lonely or lost it does get better over time. Every day is one day away. Remind yourself why they were bad for you, and do things to support yourself. Reach out if you need to talk.

thank you, your words really helped me feel a bit better. I am grateful for what you said. I feel a bit stupid being this upset about it.

 

[specklenought]

you shouldn't feel stupid! ur feelings are a response to the circumstances around you. it would be weird if you weren't upset but even then it would probably make sense in the context too.

I got out of a very toxic relationship a while ago and i'm still in a great deal of pain. i feel like it is painful bc like, we're told we should leave ppl who treat us badly/abuse us, but then we don't.... we wanna work shit out... and then it becomes too much for them and they instead leave us? it makes me feel like i was the bad person or the worthless one. I know its not true but those feelings are hard to dismiss when they come up. Its okay for anger and shame and sadness to come up. Prioritize what you need right now.

I guess what I'm saying it talk to us, reach out for support. you shouldn't have to feel alone in ur feelings.

 

[bornfree]

It is a hard struggle to stay away from the sources of pain and suffering.

 

[opiatedreamz]

personally, i'd say recognizing her abuse from the getgo is a good sign of being able to help yourself get over this hump now. it hurts now, but soon enough you'll at least hopefully be somewhat happier on your own, or if you can find someone who treats you better. that's if you choose to live on, and if you don't, that's all up to you. i send my love to you.