dra1ncoreslwt
tove 𓆩♡𓆪
- Mar 22, 2023
- 129
hello, people of ss
i havent been here in a while, things have been tolerable for me, and I have hope things might change, but the backup or certainty of ctb is there, it doesn't matter how much things get better the suffering is the same, so I still want to ctb, eventually maybe. for now I just came to vent, im practically home alone and my days become very generic and kind of sad, I've tried not to surround myself with negativity but I'm scared of the truth and the realization in the end of the day of how miserable I rally am… sometimes late at night I have breakdowns and I wrap ropes or cords around my neck to feel it tighten around my neck and feel myself slowly pass out, still too much of a coward to try ctb, that and the fact I'm not sure or ready… those times I've always been interrupted with the text of someone that is very dear to me, so it's been an emotional torment, either way I might be inactive here but I guess it also helps being heard.
anyone in a similar situation? what's stopping you? do you fantasize about it too like I do?
i havent been here in a while, things have been tolerable for me, and I have hope things might change, but the backup or certainty of ctb is there, it doesn't matter how much things get better the suffering is the same, so I still want to ctb, eventually maybe. for now I just came to vent, im practically home alone and my days become very generic and kind of sad, I've tried not to surround myself with negativity but I'm scared of the truth and the realization in the end of the day of how miserable I rally am… sometimes late at night I have breakdowns and I wrap ropes or cords around my neck to feel it tighten around my neck and feel myself slowly pass out, still too much of a coward to try ctb, that and the fact I'm not sure or ready… those times I've always been interrupted with the text of someone that is very dear to me, so it's been an emotional torment, either way I might be inactive here but I guess it also helps being heard.
anyone in a similar situation? what's stopping you? do you fantasize about it too like I do?
