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Blahblahbloop

Member
Nov 30, 2021
17
Due to a spectacularly f-ed up christmas holiday with a mental breakdown and police, I'm going to try inpatient treatment. I've never been before and I've had spotty therapeutic relationships due to frequent lack of insurance and previous therapists moving away and what not.
I'm curious about other people's experiences with voluntary treatment and what I should know about it before going in. The facility I'm going to is several hours away because rural places have no resources and covid, so I won't have family visits.
If you have had a good experience, what made it good? What makes it more bearable? What can I do to prepare myself?
 
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Midgardsorm

Midgardsorm

Paragon
Apr 28, 2020
918
I have no experience on the matter, but from what I heard it will depend a lot on the country you live in and the type of insurance you use. If your country covers medical expenses well then your stay is likely to be comfortable.

Voluntary hospitalization also differs from involuntary hospitalization. A voluntary hospitalization tends to have fewer problems and more freedoms.

But depending on the country, the hospital and whether the hospitalization is involuntary, some problems are quite common and are usually best avoided.

Since you're going there voluntarily, it's already good news. Try to search for a hospital with good reviews, it might help you.

I wish you the best.
 
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Blahblahbloop

Member
Nov 30, 2021
17
For history I've been suicidal for most of my life, but for brief periods felt hopeful and like I was getting better. My mother died suddenly when I was 18 and when I was 19 I was raped by a friend's older brother who then stalked me. Since then I have had issues with hiding and lying about my mental state, trying to appease others by pretending to be OK for as many months as I could until I would implode again.My life partner of more than a decade has put up with so many awful things I have done and hid from him when all he wanted was just for me to be well and happy.

Finally I managed to completely ruin my life, and my partner is still here trying to get me help. I want to ctb but everything I think about him I know that he would be better off without me but also that it would destroy him even more than I already have. I promised to try to make a real effort in treatment and to try to get better for real. I'm going to try. But I'm also scared and not sure I'm even worth the effort to fix.
 
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Midgardsorm

Midgardsorm

Paragon
Apr 28, 2020
918
Some people have already shared their stories here about being raped and abused. One of the worst crimes to be committed, certainly deserving of a life sentence.

I also have one story in this regard, I don't usually share it, maybe it doesn't bother me as it should or maybe I just prefer not to remember.

The fact is that it is an event that completely changes life, certainly for an 18 year old, the next few years, so-called "Best years of life" will never be what they should. And unfortunately, I must say that some people, even so-called health professionals, are poorly understood on the subject.

We sympathize deeply with what you said. There are many here who have gone through similar situations.

From what you wrote, I assume you self-destructed what was left of your life to facilitate your departure. It is common to imagine that someone's life will become better without our weight to carry. But it will become even better if we manage to recover, however difficult it may be. At least in my opinion, CTB is being a more final opinion. But of course, it's still an option. Your choice.

I'm glad you're still trying.

We will be here to support you. I hope everything works out.
 
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UpandDownPrincess

UpandDownPrincess

Elementalist
Dec 31, 2019
833
My inpatient stay was okay, even a little bit helpful.

The best feature was that I was safe from myself, so I was able to finally get some sleep. I was inpatient in the winter and I remember looking out the window at the snow and thinking that I didn't have to do anything to deal with it. I was warm and safe and protected from my worst thoughts, so I was okay.

Most of the people on my unit were younger than me and many had addiction issues that I could not relate to, so my groups were often not very useful.

Having said that, I did realize one very important thing about myself during an activity that encouraged some self-reflection. That was excellent. It was very useful to me and helped me recognize something very critical to understanding my own behavior.
 
Pure

Pure

Specialist
Jun 29, 2021
366
If you have had a good experience, what made it good? What makes it more bearable? What can I do to prepare myself?
My experience occurred because I was acutely suicidal so it was an involuntary stay.

It was traumatizing only because the situation that got me there was traumatizing but the experience itself was alright. It was a nice unit in a private hospital.

Things to make you feel better: honestly bring whatever you can that's allowed. When I got my personal books, shower items, and more clothes, it was so much better for my mental health.

Try and participate in therapy if it's offered. That's what makes it useful.
 
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Bleak

Student
Nov 10, 2021
178
Depends a lot on the staff. I had some very nice and caring nurses/doctors, but also some nasty ones who were on a power trip. I guess your fellow patients is an unknown as well. When I was in there the majority of people were really gentle and nice, though many were worn down and in great pain.

A bad thing to expect is no privacy: the nurses check on you during the night, and they stand outside the bathroom while you're taking a shower etc. A good thing is you have few responsibilities and are mostly sheltered from the outside world. I would say the best thing you can do is be nice to people and compliant with the staff.
 
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Blahblahbloop

Member
Nov 30, 2021
17
Good times, I reached out to the treatment center, made a plan to go there later this week and of course they called a wellness check from the police on me despite me saying I wasn't alone.
I understand why, but really, do people actually think involving police in this will really help? That's like saying your house is on fire, so I called an arsonist to help you.
Not getting a good feeling about this place.
 
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TornInTwo

Member
Jan 1, 2022
8
I'd say not to color the whole experience too much from the wellness check. Been there, get it… it's a crappy, humiliating experience and the police are kinda the last people you want to see at that moment (particularly if you've interacted with them in the past because of complaints against you.) It's a ham-fisted solution, but it does show that they're taking your situation seriously and they want a living human being to show up later in the week. Unfortunately there generally aren't a lot of other organizations that have the resources and response times to be able to carry out that task.

Good luck, I hope it works out and you get some benefit from the experience