raindrops
Someday, eventually
- Mar 29, 2020
- 484
As soon as the weather is better here I'm going, 100%. No backing out. Unfortunately it has rained nonstop for days & days now. I've just got to tidy/sort my room, the weather is giving me time to do this. It could be a bright, icy day but I cannot do it in the rain and wind. I've decided I could take my entire box of Trazodone with alcohol, then jump? Or do I need to be more tense? My cat sits by me constantly now. I'm all he's got, he's a Ragdoll kitty, I have written down the rehoming for Ragdolls and I have also told my nans support worker that if anything happens to me, promise me that you understand he must be rehomed appropriately...and she promised it. I'm getting closer. When I go to the cliff I'll say goodbye here but that will be a few weeks from now. I have no date, I just know I cannot live in this pain, the heartache, the regret, no more, for multiple reasons. So it will be done. Soon. Screw SI, I want this. I feel so peaceful, wow. I can't wait to make the journey. Truly I'm going as soon as everything is in the right place.
