737492

737492

broken beyond repair
Sep 7, 2019
52
I feel like no matter how good the therapy you receive is, no matter how many coping mechanisms you develop, you can't get better if your life is shit.

Some things are out of your control and always will be. And some things are impossible to cope with. Like being completely on your own, and unable to form any meaningful connections with other people. I'd say that's my situation right now, I'm all on my own even though I've put an incredible amount of effort into making friends. And pretty much every member of my family is dysfunctional in one way or the other. I have no support system at all.

This is just one of the situations that I'd say is impossible to cope with; another one I can think about is incurable, chronic illness.

When you're in a shitty situation that can't ever change, that no human being can ever be happy in, what's the point of therapy and coping?

I just don't understand.
 
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TowerUpright

TowerUpright

Disillusioned
May 26, 2019
602
Could you share what you hope to get out of therapy?? Improving interpersonal skills? Coping mechanisms? Someone to just listen??

For me, identifying my goals in therapy made it ho better than just seeing a therapist because, "my doctor wants me to".

It's kinda hard to have real virtual friends, but we are all here for support, and we'll listen to you!
 
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palebluedot

palebluedot

the view from halfway down
Apr 20, 2020
41
I agree. I don't understand how anybody with depression that is either just situational or a mix of situational and chemical can ever get better without their life improving, which is ultimately out of our control in many ways. A friend with a much better life than me got a super bad concussion that triggered a bout of purely chemical depression, and she got a lot out of therapy and can now say she is recovered from depression. I have been struggling with a mix of chemical and situational depression for my entire life, and I don't think there's any chance I will ever be happy, even with the therapy I've been doing the last couple of months.
 
737492

737492

broken beyond repair
Sep 7, 2019
52
Could you share what you hope to get out of therapy?? Improving interpersonal skills? Coping mechanisms? Someone to just listen??

For me, identifying my goals in therapy made it ho better than just seeing a therapist because, "my doctor wants me to".

It's kinda hard to have real virtual friends, but we are all here for support, and we'll listen to you!

I guess my goal has been to not think so negatively, and to figure out why it's so hard for me to connect with other people. But I've been to various therapists now, I've been with my current one for almost a year, but I don't really see any improvement.

Thank you, I appreciate your help
I agree. I don't understand how anybody with depression that is either just situational or a mix of situational and chemical can ever get better without their life improving, which is ultimately out of our control in many ways. A friend with a much better life than me got a super bad concussion that triggered a bout of purely chemical depression, and she got a lot out of therapy and can now say she is recovered from depression. I have been struggling with a mix of chemical and situational depression for my entire life, and I don't think there's any chance I will ever be happy, even with the therapy I've been doing the last couple of months.

I've met several people like that too. A girl I knew had a pretty stable life but suddenly developed depression....she got on meds, went to therapy for a bit, and never had a depressive episode again.

I won't deny that those people do suffer, but I envy them for being able to recover so easy. I've pretty much tried all methods of treating depression you can think of, ever since I was 11 years old or younger, but I never get better because my life is just shit.
 
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_Minsk

_Minsk

death: the cure for life
Dec 9, 2019
1,111
i have been asking this myself many times too..
I feel like no matter how good the therapy you receive is, no matter how many coping mechanisms you develop, you can't get better if your life is shit.
thats exactly how i feel about it. maybe it works for those who have something which can be fixed somehow or some who just simply need a break.. i've dedicated most of my life to try fixing the stuff which makes me suffer, without success, what is a therapy actually able to solve for me? nothing, i tried it and wasted my time and health due to their med's, wouldn't even call them med's since they destroyed more than they have healed.

i would have had fixed most stuff already myself if it was that simple.
 
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EmbraceOfTheVoid

EmbraceOfTheVoid

Part Time NEET - Full Time Suicidal
Mar 29, 2020
689
Some things can't be fixed because they are out of our control. Most of these people don't have any special insight into life much less the human mind and you'd gain about the same amount of help from using the Google search bar. Deep breathing, mindfulness, talk therapy, or whatever useless coping mechanism they have to offer don't address things like alienation, poverty, or disability.

If you have severe physical or psychological issues, can't conform to the society we live in or aren't able to work within it then you are pretty much shit out of luck and end up on a website like this.

Will the therapist change the economy to stop poverty wages/unaffordable housing/unsustainably high rent/boring miserable shit jobs/unsustainably long work hours/work and school stress/political and economic and social issues that divide people and cause constant conflict and isolation and loneliness?/etc

Why recommend a therapist or try to fix people if after therapy people will just be thrown back into the same situation that destroys them again?

A therapist may be helpful for people who literally just want/need to talk about feelings, but it does nothing for people whose lives are being destroyed by situational stressors and a variety of political/economic issues that neither the therapist or the person can control. -Unknown stranger from Reddit

Yes, most therapists must receive post-graduate education and certification. The education they receive is functionally like that of a priest; e.g. they are taught to view things through a very particular scope - whereas the priest is taught the lens of their particular religion, the therapist-to-be is taught the lens of contemporary psychology and its endless pathologies. Therapy in-and-of itself, is like a confessional in a church, the therapist is the priest and the patient the confessor. The patient confesses their worries and problems much like a would-be blasphemer would confess their "sins".

The sad thing is, "just put your head in the sand" is probably a pretty common response to the OPs concerns not only at mental health resources across the world, but from peers and colleagues; the patient lives in a world where being open about such things in the dehumanized, hyperindividualized public sphere typically only invites scrutiny and further alienation (likely from individuals who are just as alienated and scared as them), which increases their reliance on the therapist as much as it increases their sense of cognitive dissonance, as though they are caught between two realities in a depersonalized limbo. Of course, there's only the one reality as far as we know, but to this patient their inner world has become an enigma and its workings thoroughly mystified by an industry that portends one must go through many years of schooling and certification before they can make sense of the human mind; which is as absurd and circular claim to make as "God works in mysterious ways." - as if that explains why your toaster catching on fire this morning and the delay that caused made you miss your train commute derailing, killing everyone on board. Likewise, it is just as circular to tell someone they have a disease called "depression", which can only be treated by "trained professionals" - trained, of course, in "psychology", an invention of the human mind as much as the phrase "mental illness" with all it's implicit meanings. But the backbone of the entire practice is to be a truthclaim, much like any religion - they suppose "mental illness" to be as sacrosanct as religions hold their Gods; that is, as self-evident and infallible as a physicist would consider thermodynamics.

Perhaps it would be too radical to admit "depression" is an entirely normal reaction to a world in which one exists as a dehumanized, chronically hollowed-out wage slave whose life has been reduced to a series of empty, mindless labor and emptier consumption rituals, comforted only by addictive drugs pushed on them at every turn, and vacuous social ties of similarly hollowed out wageslaves who only know how to monologue and compete; who breathes, eats and shits microplastic, pollution and pesticides, and can't remember the last time they felt somebody actually cared if they lived or died. It'd be far too radical to admit we're living through the slow-motion collapse of the living super organism we call 'civilization' and every case of "depression" is like one little support column showing signs of giving out under the weight of a monstrosity that has become too bloated and labyrinthine for its own good. Then we'd be engaging in reality, giving the "illness" the scope it deserves, and psychology cares not for this.

The reality is, contemporary psychology functions much like a religion or a cult does, in that what one receives from it depends very much on what one puts into it - the power wielded by such organizations are directly correlate to belief of their followers. This is the power of placebo, confirmation bias, and magical thinking. If one considers their reaction to, say, climate change to be "abnormal", they merely have to walk into a therapist's office and their belief will be confirmed - their conscious experience will become a list of "symptoms" of "illness", for which they'll receive "medication". The words, the labels, the pills, they're all momentarily comforting, but none actually deal with the original problem any more than popping an Aspirin cures a raging influenza infection. That's because the entire "mental health industry" is palliative at best - worse yet, it serves at the behest of the state, which benefits massively from an industry that teaches individuals to view their life's problems through a scope that is not only decidedly apolitical but atomized as well.

Take an issue like climate change and this scope fails almost entirely - its sufficiently large-scale enough that the therapist's individualizing lens has no real answer to it. One who is trained in end-of-life therapy may have some more substantial answers that verge into decidedly philosophical territory, but most "by the book" therapists will preach willful ignorance; their role is not to create independent-thinking individuals, community leaders, politically-minded citizens or would-be revolutionaries, because they don't operate in this paradigm; an office vending machine is more communalistic than a therapist's office could ever claim to be. No, their role is to keep people complicit and complacent in the consume/work false dichotomy lifestyle for they are part of the very same paradigm, this being their work as much as preaching is a priests'. The "mental health" industry is obliged to meet the absurdity of the world it exists in and profits off of, and so existential terror becomes "eco-anxiety", another cutesy label which can be "treated" with the right combination of benzodiazepines and willful ignorance, just as a village witch doctor may have once treated "spiritual possession" with a concoction of ayahuasca and a ceremony. Now this ceremony only takes 45 minutes and $200 a week and a monthly trip to the pharmacy. Who ever said capitalism wasn't efficient?! -Unknown stranger from Reddit
 
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