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flyingjustice

flyingjustice

It is what it is
Mar 17, 2024
15
I know this is gonna sound like some real tweaker shit

I never tried any Opioids before, mainly just weed and acid with the occasional benzos for the comedown but now I have China white which is H + fent. Idk if it's the marketing getting to me but I kinda want to try it to see how it feels before I go.

Like if I'm set on dying, why not just become a tweaker until I use it to kill myself? If it randomly kills me, even better since I failed my last OD (xanax requires too much to kill you) and woke up in the hospital.

I don't know if I'm being haunted by the ghost of a junkie or what
 
A

AbandonedApe

Member
Mar 20, 2024
12
Being a tweaker is stims/meth specifically, but yes I feel you this is actually the reason I'm still alive today. Any time I've wanted to CTB I've always wanted to make my last days enjoyable so I would always buy a bunch of drugs and go down that rabbit hole first for a while to experience some last pleasure in life before I go. What always ended up happening was I would soon become convinced that the drugs could keep me going, then I would hit a rock bottom event of some kind that forced me to get clean and by that point usually enough time had passed that my urge to CTB was either temporarily gone or not so strong. So I would then proceed to get clean and start feeling better and happier for a while until the urge returned again and I repeated the cycle.

In a way that temptation to abuse first has been the number one thing that's saved my life, alongside my cat who I fear to leave behind. But I also can't necessarily suggest it for others because it could have other unforeseen consequences like prison or homelessness where you may lose your ability to CTB should you still want to.
 
MindFrog

MindFrog

:Professional Hypocrite:
Nov 19, 2020
723
I think a lot of artist who died from OD have the same mindset. Like "hey idk if I end up dead anyway, might as well have fun". It's still kinda sad to see someone taking copious amount of drugs to cope thou. Which is kinda hypocritical Iknow.

No one feels bad about people destroying their live in other ways as much as that. Well... Expect those old ladies in casinos. They make me depressed šŸ˜”.
 
F

Forever Sleep

Earned it we have...
May 4, 2022
7,627
I've always thought it would be the best way to try it- to have it as a suicide method. One (hopefully) euphoric hit and out. Shame I'm scared of breaking the law and needles.
 
flyingjustice

flyingjustice

It is what it is
Mar 17, 2024
15
I've always thought it would be the best way to try it- to have it as a suicide method. One (hopefully) euphoric hit and out. Shame I'm scared of breaking the law and needles.
Yea I can't do needles either that's why I'm shoving it up where the sun doesn't shine, gonna make a concentrated 1 mL solution then put it into a needless oral syringe. Tried it with molly before so I'm used to the procedure which should help.

I read about other's experiences with overdosing on Opiates like fent + H and the majority of them say it feels like a blissful sleep, that they experience comfort and tons of euphoria before passing out without realizing it then all of a sudden they are in the hospital.

Except for me it's gonna be euphoria and then all of a sudden eternal nothingness, like a switch getting flipped off. Anything that happens like seizures or puking will be while I'm unconscious and since I live alone, I won't be able to get Narcan'd in time.

Should finally do the job hopefully, especially with over 20x the lethal dose of fent not including the H
 
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S

sadman710

Student
Mar 22, 2024
173
I've always thought it would be the best way to try it- to have it as a suicide method. One (hopefully) euphoric hit and out. Shame I'm scared of breaking the law and needles.
Out of all the methods out there it's probably the most peaceful. If it fails it can be problematic and agonizing.
 
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F

Forever Sleep

Earned it we have...
May 4, 2022
7,627
Yea I can't do needles either that's why I'm shoving it up where the sun doesn't shine, gonna make a concentrated 1 mL solution then put it into a needless oral syringe. Tried it with molly before so I'm used to the procedure which should help.

I read about other's experiences with overdosing on Opiates like fent + H and the majority of them say it feels like a blissful sleep, that they experience comfort and tons of euphoria before passing out without realizing it then all of a sudden they are in the hospital.

Except for me it's gonna be euphoria and then all of a sudden eternal nothingness, like a switch getting flipped off. Anything that happens like seizures or puking will be while I'm unconscious and since I live alone, I won't be able to get Narcan'd in time.

Should finally do the job hopefully, especially with over 20x the lethal dose of fent not including the H

Yeah, it does sound pretty glorious. I get the impression terribly brave doctors helped my Mum along at the end of a long battle with cancer in hospital. She was given heroin at the end. A doctor said to my Dad- 'She'll go out in a blaze of glory.' It so badly needs to be legalised though, so that brave people like him don't get in to trouble whilst it can also be properly regulated so that it isn't used nefariously.

Where the sun don't shine... that made me laugh. šŸ˜†
 
N33dT0D13

N33dT0D13

It/Xe
Apr 2, 2023
153
No desire to get on heroin or meth but I'd kill to try cocaine, very curious about it
Already in a dedicated relationship with Mary Jane lol
Pills are great but my pillpopper godmom is stingy with em and I'm not desperate enough to buy them myself or steal them at the moment
 
sserafim

sserafim

the darker the night, the brighter the stars
Sep 13, 2023
7,682
No desire to get on heroin or meth but I'd kill to try cocaine, very curious about it
Already in a dedicated relationship with Mary Jane lol
Pills are great but my pillpopper godmom is stingy with em and I'm not desperate enough to buy them myself or steal them at the moment
I heard that cocaine messes up your nose
 

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