Sn tonight

[Chischek]

I'm so tired... I got turned away from a crisis center and thr psychiatrist basically told me to cut myself if things get too rough and I can no longer handle my suicidal thoughts....

I have been trying to get better but it just doesn't seem to work and no one takes me seriously.. just because I have the diagnose bpd I'm no longer taken seriously... it's all so fucked up.

Tonught I'm taking my sn... only water and sn because I have nothing else and I can no longer take it.

 

[Mizuri]

That's a bad fcking psychiatrist, god damnit.

Sorry to hear you are going to CTB. Do you maybe want to talk about it before you do it? How are you?

 

[Pen>Sword]

psychiatrist basically told me to cut myself if things get too rough and I can no longer handle my suicidal thoughts....

They can do that? I thought they can't do that since it's their job, and encouraging suicide is illegal. They lose their license and sentence to jail for that.

 

[aminend]

Who know, maybe we come back again in a similar world but in a better version. the builder of this world must know how much we suffered and battled but our energy was limited.

 

[Chischek]

I'm so tired and I dont know what to do... everything is ready all I have to do it dri k it...

They can do that? I thought they can't do that since it's their job, and encouraging suicide is illegal. They lose their license and sentence to jail for that.

He phrased in a way that would never give him away but I knew what he ment

 

[Mizuri]

They can do that? I thought they can't do that since it's their job, and encouraging suicide is illegal. They lose their license and sentence to jail for that.

He (the psychiatrist) probably meant cutting arms. Like, not to kill yourself.

Although, he shouldn't have told that no matter how severe OP's situation is.

 

[Chischek]

He (the psychiatrist) probably meant cutting arms. Like, not to kill yourself.

Although, he shouldn't have told that no matter how severe OP's situation is.

Yes that's what he ment... but its so fucked up.

 

[x~Sophia~x]

Yeah, BPD as a diagnosis is the worst @Chischek , especially in the UK. Their usual response to patients who say they're suicidal is "you have the mental capacity to make that decision..." People with BPD are rarely hospitalised or sectioned in UK.

I'm sorry you're being treated so badly, please reconsider your decision, as it does seem to be on impulse, but I understand totally how you feel so discarded by the mh services since being diagnosed with BPD, it's shit!
Sending hugs and love from one frustrated BPDer to another...... >

 

[Abir_london]

I'm so sorry:(
Do you wanna talk? I'm here all ears !

 

[x~Sophia~x]

They can do that? I thought they can't do that since it's their job, and encouraging suicide is illegal. They lose their license and sentence to jail for that.

They say "you have the mental capacity to make that decision..." It's truly shocking!

 

[Mizuri]

I'm so tired and I dont know what to do... everything is ready all I have to do it drink it...

Do you think killing yourself is the only way to fix everything? What makes you want to do it?

 

[Chischek]

Do you think killing yourself is the only way to fix everything? What makes you want to do it?

I dont know what else to do... I don't see any future and I'm so tired of fighting with myself, it's exhausting... especially when no one takes you seriously. I have been trying to fix my life for the past year and I just don't see how anymore, or even why... its all meaningless anyway

They say "you have the mental capacity to make that decision..." It's truly shocking!

Exactly! All I asked for is for some support till it gets a bit easier but they just think I'm playing games... its exhausting

 

[x~Sophia~x]

Exactly! All I asked for is for some support till it gets a bit easier but they just think I'm playing games... its exhausting

The mh service under the NHS have so much to answer for, so many young people with BPD are committing suicide lately in UK, because they're begging for help to be kept safe, and there isn't any.

 

[Chischek]

The mh service under the NHS have so much to answer for, so many young people with BPD are committing suicide lately in UK, because they're begging for help to be kept safe, and there isn't any.

I'm in Belgium but its thesame crap. All I asked was a few days and the psychiatrist said no... I don't understand it all. I thought if you asked for help they will take you seriously but now it seems all I can do is ctb because that's how it works.

 

[x~Sophia~x]

I'm in Belgium but its thesame crap. All I asked was a few days and the psychiatrist said no... I don't understand it all. I thought if you asked for help they will take you seriously but now it seems all I can do is ctb because that's how it works.

You asked for a few days in psych hospital? I don't know what the covid situation is like at the moment in Belgium, but in UK, you have to be in a VERY bad way to be admitted because of all the restrictions. Do you think that could be the reason he said no?

 

[Chischek]

You asked for a few days in psych hospital? I don't know what the covid situation is like at the moment in Belgium, but in UK, you have to be in a VERY bad way to be admitted because of all the restrictions. Do you think that could be the reason he said no?

No you can still get admitted, it's because he is tge one who diagnosed me and he doesn't take me seriously. He knows me and he knows that I have sn at my place so I guess he just thinks it's all empty words from my side.

 

[x~Sophia~x]

No you can still get admitted, it's because he is tge one who diagnosed me and he doesn't take me seriously. He knows me and he knows that I have sn at my place so I guess he just thinks it's all empty words from my side.

WHAAAT? He's TESTING you?? WTF???

 

[Chischek]

WHAAAT? He's TESTING you?? WTF???

That's what it seems like...

 

[x~Sophia~x]

Is there anyone at home you can talk to, tell them how you're feeling, or a friend you can trust?

 

[Mizuri]

That's what it seems like...

What a fcking moron, Jesus. Someone, take his medical license away from him. I am furious.

 

[Chischek]

Is there anyone at home you can talk to, tell them how you're feeling, or a friend you can trust?

No, I don't wanna burden my friend because it's too hard on them. My family said that people that want to kill themselves just do it and don't talk about it. I called a suicide hotline but the lady as nice as she was really didn't know what she was doing... so im just by myself.

What a fcking moron, Jesus. Someone, take a medical license away from him. I am furious.

He is being superweird to me, it's like he is playing some kind of a game but I don't see the point. It feels like a power struggle and that's not what I wanted. I just asked for a few days to calm down.

 

[Mizuri]

No, I don't wanna burden my friend because it's too hard on them. My family said that people that want to kill themselves just do it and don't talk about it. I called a suicide hotline but the lady as nice as she was really didn't know what she was doing... so im just by myself.

No. You absolutely should try talking about it with your friends. With someone you trust.

I understand how you feel, there are people that will help you. You don't have to carry all that weight all by yourself.
Just try talking about it to someone.

Don't overthink it, don't try to predict their reaction to you telling them all of your thoughts. Simply talk to them.

 

[Chischek]

No. You absolutely should try talking about it with your friends. With someone you trust.

I understand how you feel, there are people that will help you. You don't have to carry all that weight all by yourself.

I can't, most of them are very recent friends and it's not a burden you can expect from someone you've known only for a year. I'm just so confused and lost, I don't understand anything anymore

 

[x~Sophia~x]

No, I don't wanna burden my friend because it's too hard on them. My family said that people that want to kill themselves just do it and don't talk about it. I called a suicide hotline but the lady as nice as she was really didn't know what she was doing... so im just by myself.

Please take up @Abir_london 's kind offer to chat with them. Please don't do anything impulsive, if you take SN without the painkillers etc and without fasting, you'll probably end up in a hell of a lot of pain and distress.
Are you still there @Chischek ?
Did you contact @Abir_london ?

 

[6Judas6]

I'm so tired... I got turned away from a crisis center and thr psychiatrist basically told me to cut myself if things get too rough and I can no longer handle my suicidal thoughts....

I have been trying to get better but it just doesn't seem to work and no one takes me seriously.. just because I have the diagnose bpd I'm no longer taken seriously... it's all so fucked up.

Tonught I'm taking my sn... only water and sn because I have nothing else and I can no longer take it.

I wish you a good trip. Good luck

 

[Defenestration]

Please take up @Abir_london 's kind offer to chat with them. Please don't do anything impulsive, if you take SN without the painkillers etc and without fasting, you'll probably end up in a hell of a lot of pain and distress.
Are you still there @Chischek ?
Did you contact @Abir_london ?

Listen sophia.
Not impulsive suicide please!

 

[heraclitus]

There are other forums on this site, too. Browse around - find someone you like and ask them to chat. We're all here for each other.

 

[Poisonblood]

Most psychiatrists are evil scum and the drugs they prescribe to patients are meant to slowly chemically lobotomize them. I have been drugged for several years and institutionalized for 5 months (first day was in a psyche ward where I was harassed, restrained, injected with drugs and beaten, after that I got sent to a nursing home where I spent 5 months). Those experiences has only served to further increase my hatred of the criminal medical establishment and people in general.