Venting Sitting alone in the park again...as always

[Retroguy]

I am sitting alone in the park right now.
Like I always do. Because I have zero friends and no gf.
It's a nightmare being so alone.

The only people I talk to are people at work (I don't count it, it's just work related talk) and my parents.

Not having any friends and no romantic partner is the main reason I want to ctb.

I wish I was never born.
Then I wouldn't be here suffering because I am lonely and have no friends and no gf.
I envy the dead they are no longer lonely like I am.

 

[Renee]

I totally understand. I was there 2 years. I moved 100 miles after a divorce. Everyday. I hated weekend nights. Ironically I met my wife there. So hang in there. It did suck also. that was the period I sliced up my left wrist. Close to 40 stitches. 36 years later I still have a scar.

 

[William01]

Cam relate to that - understand all too well I also envy the dead because their minds are no longer active they can no long think or feel.

 

[FuneralCry]

I understand that loneliness is painful for so many who exist here, existence is just too cruel, I also wish I never existed as to never exist prevents all suffering, it comforts me the thought of nothingness, I envy those who are gone as they are at peace.

 

[Retroguy]

I totally understand. I was there 2 years. I moved 100 miles after a divorce. Everyday. I hated weekend nights. Ironically I met my wife there. So hang in there. It did suck also. that was the period I sliced up my left wrist. Close to 40 stitches. 36 years later I still have a scar.

How old are you?

Cam relate to that - understand all too well I also envy the dead because their minds are no longer active they can no long think or feel.

I understand that loneliness is painful for so many who exist here, existence is just too cruel, I also wish I never existed as to never exist prevents all suffering, it comforts me the thought of nothingness, I envy those who are gone as they are at peace.

Do you guys feel lonely too?
And are you alone all the time too like me?
Or do you have friends/gf to go out with sometimes to the movies/restaurant?

 

[FuneralCry]

I'd personally prefer to be alone, being around other people is never something that I've wished for.

 

[Retroguy]

I'd personally prefer to be alone, being around other people is never something that I've wished for.

So you don't have any friends and are all the time alone?

How do you deal with the crushing lonelyness that comes with being alone all the time?
It's one of the main reasons I want to ctb.
That soul crushing lonelyness when you have zero friends and romantic partners and you know that no one in this world gives a shit about you.

 

[FuneralCry]

So you don't have any friends and are all the time alone?

How do you deal with the crushing lonelyness that comes with being alone all the time?
It's one of the main reasons I want to ctb.
That soul crushing lonelyness when you have zero friends and romantic partners and you know that no one in this world gives a shit about you.

I do have a few family members but I don't really get lonely like how you are describing in the thread, I get that it's painful for other people though. Being around other people has always been something tiring for me, in the past it's made me just want to ctb even more. And anyway other people can very easily make existing even worse with their cruelty.

 

[AlouA]

How old are you?


Do you guys feel lonely too?
And are you alone all the time too like me?
Or do you have friends/gf to go out with sometimes to the movies/restaurant?

I don't have anyone close enough to consider a friend, there was one but I've lost the connection we had and I can't even bring myself to talk with my classmates in work-related stuff... I have not experienced working... I am also very lonely... I am merely taking up space and air. . .. I feel so useless.. you're not along in the idea of wanting to do CTB... My problem really roots from my SA

 

[manuel1056x]

Feel the same. I'm honestly given up, with sitting in parks or big public places. I'm also alone and I think I will always be, because I can't really do an good conversation with someone else. Wish I were dead also. I'm not sure if it works, because I still try it. I look for places, where I can find people who maybe have the same interest like me. For example music stores. But if I never start a conversation there, I will never have one. So, think that for me at least it is waste of time. You maybe can find people online here on this side with the same interest like you. I wish you luck, and that you will become happy. Sometimes in life, unexpected things can happen.

 

[foreverfalling]

Maybe you will become enlightened sitting on a park bench like Eckhart Tolle. I sometimes like to go out into the forest and sit there, just watching the trees. Focusing on just the present moment, I can get brief glimpses of peace and relaxation. I know that doesn't help with the loneliness, if I could I'd sit together with you for a while.