Discussion should people with mental illness have children?

[Donk]

i know this might spark some controversy. however my father suffers from mental illness and so do I. My psychiatrist explained that mental illness can be hereditary and there are studies done which supports this fact. so i'll leave this out for everyone as a discussion. should people with mental illness be more incline to not have children knowing that their offspring will be more susceptible to experiencing mental illness?

 

[Mr. ‘K so?]

Depends on what side of the fence you're on. Some people are going to argue that they have the right to pass on their genes and have kids same as you, others like myself are going to say no.

 

[Una Nancy]

Depends on whether it's hereditary or not, but I don't know if it's possible to prove it
I also come from a family where I inherited my father's poor mental health soooo if someone was mentally ill and knew that it could be hereditary, then I'd say they should think about it and wonder if it's really good for their future children to possibly have their whole life impacted because of it

I mean, in an ideal world, there shouldn't be any illness
but then there's the taboo of eugenics because of what happened during the war

 

[Cutepoison]

I'm inclined to say no.

 

[AcornUnderground]

A resounding NO. Children are the tragedy in illness of all kinds.

 

[Buffy5120]

I'm inclined to say no.

Just feel like its too much

 

[Nem]

I don't think anyone should be having children, there's way too many people in this world as it is.
Peace/hugs

 

[Soulless_Angel]

OH hell I hate these threads have debated them many a time, I speak from the other side, i speak as a mother, IF I had known mental health issues were going to show and then cause me to go down this route, my children potentially wouldn't exist right now,
As it stands I have produced mini humans, they are growing and grown, life is dealing them a hand that is different for each, whether that is from me or not I simply cannot answer that, as a parent I regret bringing life into the world, but on the other hand I do not regret giving these souls the chance to shine

its so fucking complicated, but I will debate all I can on this point!

 

[Blutsager]

I would personally never have children.

Hell, I am even a virgin and even wonder if I regret that, as I am terrified of any human connection that may make me suffer their suffering, or when they are gone. I already have my family, that I love dearly and cheerish the time I spend with them.

I don't want to have more people to suffer for. Specially I don't want kids, so fragile, so vulnerable to a merciless world.

And as someone has mentioned: not having babies is at this point a human service. We need to stop our rampant population growth. We need to give our specie time to reorganize things before continuing our growth.

We blame the rich and powerful for many if's that should be considered but aren't. From ecological damage to social injustices. But to no small degree this issues ain't considered cause those who have the power to plan for them don't have the time, being in a constant rush to keep up with the population growth of their nations. Should this nations stop growing, it would give nations less of a hurry to keep their economies growing to encompass an ever larger population, and to focus more on other matters.

 

[Shinbu]

I believe we should stop having children all together. Why continue this madness?.

 

[Mistake of Nature]

This is a tough one. I'm an anti-natalist so I don't believe people should have children, but I realize that that's a rather extreme POV.

My gut reaction is a definite no, but maybe it depends on the type of mental illness. Schizophrenia, for example, can be more disruptive and may be more easily passed on to children than, say, a phobia of flying on airplanes, so maybe it's more risky for a person with schizophrenia to have children than for an individual with a specific phobia to do so.

Also, yes, psychological disorders have a genetic component, but we also have to consider whether some mentally ill people can provide the supportive, nurturing, and healthy environment that children need. I'm definitely not saying that they can't or that it's not possible (I'm sure there are many mentally ill parents who are doing a wonderful job of raising their children!) but like, when I'm in a depressive episode where I literally cannot leave my bed and can do nothing but sob all day and stare at the ceiling, there's no way I would ever be able to care for a child in that state.

 

[muffin222]

It's a very personal and subjective choice, but I would err on the side of caution.

Both of my parents struggle with mental health issues and it's absolutely been passed on to me. I have suffered with depression and anxiety since age 12. If I had a choice and had known I'd suffer these issues throughout my life, I would have opted to have not been born. It's been so painful for me to live with these limitations. But, I can't speak for everyone.

 

[Y78]

no.they shouldnt.

 

[Donk]

i was devestated when i found out that me and my wife couldnt have children. but in hindsight im so glad we didnt because im in no condition to raise a child. all the burden would be put on my wife.

 

[Sensei]

Mental illnesses can't be inherited. What can be inherited is a gene sequence which increases the risk of developing a mental illness. A couple who both suffer from schizophrenia won't automatically get a child who will become schizophrenic, but the risk is higher.

 

[MaybeSoon]

I cringe every time I see these kind of threads on here. As if parents on here don't have enough to deal with they're made out to be villians by people who should have more empathy.

 

[departing]

No... and I don't plan on having children. My parents passed their genes to me and I'm not inclined to pay it forward.

 

[Soulless_Angel]

I cringe every time I see these kind of threads on here. As if parents on here don't have enough to deal with they're made out to be villians by people who should have more empathy.

thank you!

So many state they didn't' give permission to be born, but how can you give permission if you are not here, so they state that we have no right to make that choice for them, but how can they have a choice if they do not exist
Surely to have that choice you need to exist in the first instance, at which point, as an adult you are allowed to then make your own mind up on where you take this life?

Its an argument I see all too often on this forum

When I had my children I was in a stable place, I did not forsee nor did I plan the hell that came over me in the last year.

 

[Donk]

I cringe every time I see these kind of threads on here. As if parents on here don't have enough to deal with they're made out to be villians by people who should have more empathy.

i apologize if i made some of you feel like a villian. that was not my intention when writing this post. i should have considered SS members who have children of their own before making this thread

thank you!

So many state they didn't' give permission to be born, but how can you give permission if you are not here, so they state that we have no right to make that choice for them, but how can they have a choice if they do not exist
Surely to have that choice you need to exist in the first instance, at which point, as an adult you are allowed to then make your own mind up on where you take this life?

Its an argument I see all too often on this forum

When I had my children I was in a stable place, I did not forsee nor did I plan the hell that came over me in the last year.

there wont be any inherit risk if you were stable while your children was born. i was referring to those who already had existing conditions and were planning to have children.

 

[muffin222]

thank you!

So many state they didn't' give permission to be born, but how can you give permission if you are not here, so they state that we have no right to make that choice for them, but how can they have a choice if they do not exist
Surely to have that choice you need to exist in the first instance, at which point, as an adult you are allowed to then make your own mind up on where you take this life?

Its an argument I see all too often on this forum

When I had my children I was in a stable place, I did not forsee nor did I plan the hell that came over me in the last year.

I cringe every time I see these kind of threads on here. As if parents on here don't have enough to deal with they're made out to be villians by people who should have more empathy.

I understand your point, but we all have the right to express our own opinions. I do wish my parents had considered their mental health concerns before having children. I DO suffer greatly as a result of not only the mental illness that was passed onto me, but also from the consequent... deficiencies my parents had in terms of their ability to raise me properly and attend to my needs due to said issues. I'm not saying all parents who have mental health problems are deficient as parents. But, mine were. They could have considered this before having multiple children, but they didn't. Only they could have made that choice, but they didn't. No one is making anyone out to be a villain. We're all simply expressing opinions that may strike a nerve for some.

 

[Blutsager]

To everyone, specially those of you who are mentally ill parents here reading this:

I would like to present my interpretation of the question and opinions presented on the comments here, and how I personally think you all should understand them, and to know this should in no way be a condemnation of you or your desire to have children... even tough some comments certainly were mean towards you, and I, even if I wasn't one of them, apologize for it.

I believe the fact that you have a mental illness is merely another consideration in a long list of concepts that potential parents should, and almost never do, consider before taking the decision of having children. Wealth, physical and mental health, age, social and political context, and so many other factors should be put into consideration by parents before deciding to have children. And among this many factors, mental illness is just one more of them. Being mentally ill should not, and does not mean you shouldn't have children. Only you can decide that. That being said, it is clear that, alongside with all the other factors mentioned before, it is a factor that you should put into consideration before going for it. To consider if you truly are capable of handling children, and of giving them the life of happiness and harmony they deserve.

This is an important decision, that should be given the proper ammount of time to consider, just like any other... I would like to believe all of you are good at sitting down and thinking your decisions through, considering that the prime purpose of this place is related to the most important decision you can make on your life... to end it. I would like to believe, for those of you who had made such decision, you have sat down and thought such decision through, in detail, for the ammount of time such decision deserves.

Regardless, I want you to know, to all of you mentally ill who have children here, I do not judge you for your illness. Only for your results. If your kid have enjoyed a life of happiness, if your kids live or have lived in harmony, if you gave them a life perhaps even better than that which was given to you... then I congratulate you, for you have succeded as parents.

@Soulless_Angel I want this to be specially for you. I feel like you have been hurt by a post that was too personal for you, and I understand it.

 

[AcornUnderground]

I have two small children and I had them before I had my terrible chronic illness diagnosis. I'm in so much pain I can't survive it. I can't take care of them, I'm bedridden and depressed on top of a terrible disease, Sjögrens Syndrome. I certainly am not trying to make anyone feel bad for having children - that is my own cross to bear - but if you KNOW that you have mental illness, particularly severe enough to be on this site, easier said than done but I certainly think it is wisest not to have children.

 

[coreofanapple]

Fuck no.

 

[Dead beat dad]

i know this might spark some controversy. however my father suffers from mental illness and so do I. My psychiatrist explained that mental illness can be hereditary and there are studies done which supports this fact. so i'll leave this out for everyone as a discussion. should people with mental illness be more incline to not have children knowing that their offspring will be more susceptible to experiencing mental illness?

Should people in extreme poverty have children?
Should anyone be having kids at all?
The world is a cruel and terrible place and suffering is pretty much assured in one way or another.
I'd say no. But it depends on the individual. I have mental illness and am also a parent, I'm trying my valiant best to right the wrongs of my father, doesn't make him or me a bad person.
Peace brothers and sisters
DBD

 

[RayoSinSol]

If there's anything history has shown, it's that "should or shouldn't" just isn't a factor in the minds of most people who reproduce. It's usually more so a decision along the lines of "to get my dick wet or not to get my dick wet, that is the question."

Personally, I have zero interest in forcing some random person to come into existence carrying my garbage, depression and anxiety-soaked genes through this every-increasingly depressing world.

Others would disagree.

The vast majority, however, just won't really even consider such questions either way, and reproduction laws aren't really enforceable in much of the world at this point, so whatever you think personally it's kind of a moot question on the grand scale unless you plan on going all Mao Zedong on our asses.

 

[disabledandhopeless]

No. I feel like even parents with physical illness shouldn't have children as they might pass it down to them too

 

[sadgirl2002]

I don't know if mental illnesses are hereditary but I'm in no mindset to ever have children. When my life got even worse three years ago, I told myself in my mind that I will never have a children or be with someone. The world will chew these children up and spit them out, they're so pure and innocent but when they grow up, the world corrupts all of them and I can't bear that. I don't think people with mental illnesses should have kids because their illness and actions can affect their children. I don't think anyone should have children, even those who don't have mental illnesses.

 

[LMLN]

A lot of people should not have children. I include myself in that group! But the drive to procreate is strong, and when we are young we don't think about the long term. And the only way to stop it is to have people forcibly sterilized, which is a power that could and would be abused.

 

[MaybeSoon]

I have mental illness and am also a parent, I'm trying my valiant best
DBD

That's all anyone can ever ask. Hope you find your path through the darkness mate.

 

[AcornUnderground]

It is torment, having children you will LEAVE BEHIND. Pain outweighing choice. I'm nearly in a mental institution driving myself insane over it. I'm in so much pain but I can't leave. I can't take it anymore. I wouldn't wish this on anyone, and the even bigger tragedy is the kids.