Help Should I try meds again?

[NumbItAll]

I've been miserable for 15 years and nothing seems to make any difference. I'm not really capable of doing much, but there are still meds I haven't tried. I've only tried SSRIs which I did not like, and benzos, which I do like but use sparingly. My therapist, who I like, referred me to a psychiatrist, and I'm finally considering it. Since I am unlikely to ctb any time soon, maybe there's something that could make it a little easier to be alive. I am under no illusion that there will be any magic cure.

Pros:

• could alleviate suffering
• could give me more energy, open up opportunities
• exhausting all options

Cons:

• unpleasant trial and error process if the first thing doesn't work
• potential side FX
• potential withdrawal FX
• $$ (though worth it if it helps)

Thoughts?

 

[Sherri]

I'm sorry for you going through a hard time, when I saw my final shrink after seeing so many I told him your exact words is it gonna work or are we gonna fool ourselves again. I don't know what brands you took, but mine helped me I would say 60%. I was lying most days in bed at my worst staring at the ceiling with the tv on, personally speaking I would give it a try.

 

[righttochoosevoice]

I second that, give it a try. I am a therapist myself and struggle greatly with depression. I am on and off Wellbutrin XL 150... sometimes I go up to 300mg if, like now, i'm in a particularly dark winter on top of work burnout and covid isolation. I find it helps enough to get me through. But if you tend more towards anxiety, then Wellbutrin may not be for you. It has a stimulating effect (at first).

 

[NumbItAll]

I second that, give it a try. I am a therapist myself and struggle greatly with depression. I am on and off Wellbutrin XL 150... sometimes I go up to 300mg if, like now, i'm in a particularly dark winter on top of work burnout and covid isolation. I find it helps enough to get me through. But if you tend more towards anxiety, then Wellbutrin may not be for you. It has a stimulating effect (at first).

That is actually what my therapist suggested. It is scary to try something new but I don't really have any other options.

 

[JustHeckinKillMe]

Give it a try

 

[righttochoosevoice]

That is actually what my therapist suggested. It is scary to try something new but I don't really have any other options.

I understand the fear. I am always afraid to try a new med... If I can offer any assurance... a doctor friend of mine put it to me this way - Wellbutrin is the easiest medication to get off of... in her opinion it is the cleanest psychotropic out there. I have found that to be true for me. I have tried most meds, but that one is the most enjoyable - IF it works for you - but again, if you are prone to anxiety or if it doesn't work for you... there are a lot of other choices..

 

[InezSerrano]

Buspirone helps me a lot.

 

[NumbItAll]

I put this on hold because CBD has made such a dramatic difference for me and I wanted to see how things played out. After a few months I can see I have plateaued, so I want to see if adding in some kind of meds could help the rest of the way. As great as CBD has been, it's still just not enough for me to have a normal quality of life. Worth a shot at least to see if anything else could help. No idea why I've neglected it for so long, but I guess that's what a sick brain does. Will update in a few months maybe if anything significant happens.

 

[NumbItAll]

Fun update: I lasted five days on fluoxetine (Prozac) and two days on venlaxafine (Effexor XR). Fluoxetine sent me into a panic and made me want to kill myself. Venlaxafine felt like meth and felt like it was burning a hole in my brain. Both drugs gave me a horrible numb feeling that drove me crazy.

A couple weeks after I stopped fluoxetine, I took an antihistamine sleeping aid (doxylamine succinate). I think it reacted with the remaining fluoxetine in my system because I woke up with my head spinning from extreme dizziness that made it impossible to stand up without holding on to something. That has steadily improved over the last couple weeks and I am okay now but still not 100%.

I know there's other stuff out there but my experience with meds has been so appalling that I'm afraid to try anything else. Not sure whether I will keep my next appointment. Input welcome but ultimately it will come down to my risk tolerance. I'm glad these meds work for some people but hey I guess the rest of us are just fucked! This trial and error process where the errors can be catastrophic is ridiculous.

 

[Celerity]

I also disliked SSRIs. After speaking to experts when I was a graduate student and perusing the literature, I think they are severely overrated. Most of the effect (75% by some estimates) is placebo.

I have been prescribed an atypical antipsychotic, Seroquel/Quetiapine, and an anti-seizure med, Lamictal/Lamotrigine to use as "mood stabilizers". Unfortunately, I have failed both at therapeutic doses because I could not tolerate their side effects. Lamictal made me feel woozy like I had low blood pressure, caused my eyes to burn, and shifted my mood into toxic irritability mode. Seroquel led to massive weight gain. I was a size 8 before starting and am back up to a size 14. The long-term side effects of atypical antipsychotics are even more daunting with diabetes and a debilitating neurological disorder called tardive dyskinesia in the cards.

All that said, I am willing to try other mood stabilizers and am considering the OG, lithium despite the kidney failure risk and unpleasant side effects. When you have suffered for this long, you're willing to put up with a lot of shit. I hope you and I become one of those people who asks themselves, "Where has this medication been all my life?", and gets a lot of bang for their buck.

EDIT: After reading some of your other comments, I would not recommend Seroquel or Lamictal. Both medications cause substantial feelings of "wooziness" which many people would describe as "dizzy".