Should I come out before I ctb?

[Gunthertempname]

Ive been planning to ctb with sleeping pills and a plastic bag for a while now but for probably longer ive been coming to realize that im trans. Should i come out to the people i know before i ctb, leave it on a note, or just not tell anyone?

 

[TBONTB]

What do you want?

Honestly, why not make the choice that is best for your alive self?

And I'm not trans, so I don't know. Hopefully someone who is can share a better perspective than mine. But I always think secrets hurt us. So what if you chose one or two people you trust a lot to try it out on?

And then see how you feel about everything?

 

[wishingonstars]

As a trans person I agree with @TBONTB, also maybe coming out will give you something to live for, living your truth may be better than having to pretend to be someone you're not. Maybe not, but it's worth a shot and if not ctb is always there.

 

[claracatchingthebus]

Ive been planning to ctb with sleeping pills and a plastic bag for a while now but for probably longer ive been coming to realize that im trans. Should i come out to the people i know before i ctb, leave it on a note, or just not tell anyone?

could it impact your ability to have food or housing?

(ie, if you are a suicidal trans person at 19 and depending on family for food/shelter/support and they are super religious and could stop the support, I don't know if that's the best idea because sometimes people want to commit suicide, but survival instinct prevents them from ending it or they just fail in their attempt or change their mind, and it would be awful to be depressed, and cut off from support, and not able to do it.)

it would help to know your economic situation to reply

 

[Cristian]

Are you in any trans groups (or LGBTQ groups more generally)? Either online or IRL? If not, that may be worth exploring.

 

[claracatchingthebus]

Since you aren't answering right away, I'll be more specific:

I think you should come out to any liberal people who are supportive of trans people, as long as it would not get back to anyone financially supporting you who is conservative and could stop support.

You could also come out to liberal people who support trans people and say "Please don't post anything online because I have conservative family" if you are on something like Facebook with both friends and conservative family.

If you are financially independent and have savings, yes, come out right away.

Also, if you are suicidal and trans and in a conservative area, I would move to a more liberal area that accepts Trans people. Some cities and states love their trans people and think of them like a special wonderful part of the community. If you can't move right away, don't come out, save up, then move.

 

[NormallyNeurotic]

Honestly, as a trans person, I'd personally come out like, a week or so before the original planned date. Start online, maybe even just on a queer Discord server or group, or if your area has a queer non-profit with support groups, try there. The experience of coming out to accepting people is something that is absolutely worth it to experience at least once.

 

[Gunthertempname]

Since you aren't answering right away, I'll be more specific:

I think you should come out to any liberal people who are supportive of trans people, as long as it would not get back to anyone financially supporting you who is conservative and could stop support.

You could also come out to liberal people who support trans people and say "Please don't post anything online because I have conservative family" if you are on something like Facebook with both friends and conservative family.

If you are financially independent and have savings, yes, come out right away.

Also, if you are suicidal and trans and in a conservative area, I would move to a more liberal area that accepts Trans people. Some cities and states love their trans people and think of them like a special wonderful part of the community. If you can't move right away, don't come out, save up, then move.

My parents are super conservative and christian and have openly stated to me that they do not support of trans people in any way whatsoever and ive been trying to move out but all the jobs in my area pay literal dirt Im going to try coming out to a few of my friends who i know without a doubt will be accepting of me and if nothing gets better im probably just going to go through my original plan to cbt

Are you in any trans groups (or LGBTQ groups more generally)? Either online or IRL? If not, that may be worth exploring.

Not really :/ theres not many support groups in my area that im aware of. Im in a few discord servers but not exactly active on them