Help separated from loved ones

[Life_and_Death]

has anyone been forcefully separated from a loved one. either by law or just to avoid the law? im talking something like parents getting divorce and the other getting complete custody of the kid or something like that.

for me its my brothers. they are 11+ years younger then me. by the time i moved out at 16 the damage my parents did was done. they still live there and i miss them so much. i remember when i was little my grandfather would tell me he had something to tell me but it had to wait until i was older. and now im doing the same thing to my brothers. how do you tell a 10yo about the hell youve been through and how can you expect them to understand. even so until they are 16 i cant see them because the parents would be involved and if they wanted to be assholes cops could get involved but even if they wanted to play all cool and buddy buddy i just couldnt without being filled with rage for the pain im still suffering after being away from them for 5-6 years. i miss my boys so much, it hurts being without them. (also i call them my boys because aside from the younger brother that i was only around for a year or 2 and he spent most of that time in hospital, i raised them because they were too busy getting fucking high and drunk to give a flying fuck about anything so yes they are MY BOYS.......sorry i think i got a little upset....im just trying to not cry right now but its not working.....)

 

[Silvermorning]

Is the separation permanent or temporary?

Are you keeping in touch with them?

Very sorry.

 

[Life_and_Death]

Is the separation permanent or temporary?

Are you keeping in touch with them?

Very sorry.

temporary. they become legal adults when they are 16 so the parents cant do anything if they optionally decide to talk to me. they can always make up lies but considering i have nothing but truths to tell at that point getting police involved would only hurt them lol. aside from that yes. im talking to the eldest through fb but as far as i know the parents dont know. im scared they will find out though and do something about it. even though again.....ill just tell the cops my side. the whole thing is just anxiety ridden. i just want to hug them again. i want to show them i love them. im scared one day words wont be enough anymore......

 

[NeverGoodEnuff]

has anyone been forcefully separated from a loved one. either by law or just to avoid the law? im talking something like parents getting divorce and the other getting complete custody of the kid or something like that.

for me its my brothers. they are 11+ years younger then me. by the time i moved out at 16 the damage my parents did was done. they still live there and i miss them so much. i remember when i was little my grandfather would tell me he had something to tell me but it had to wait until i was older. and now im doing the same thing to my brothers. how do you tell a 10yo about the hell youve been through and how can you expect them to understand. even so until they are 16 i cant see them because the parents would be involved and if they wanted to be assholes cops could get involved but even if they wanted to play all cool and buddy buddy i just couldnt without being filled with rage for the pain im still suffering after being away from them for 5-6 years. i miss my boys so much, it hurts being without them. (also i call them my boys because aside from the younger brother that i was only around for a year or 2 and he spent most of that time in hospital, i raised them because they were too busy getting fucking high and drunk to give a flying fuck about anything so yes they are MY BOYS.......sorry i think i got a little upset....im just trying to not cry right now but its not working.....)

L&D, I am so very sorry for you and your brothers. This is, IMHO, the worst. Similar situation with my grandchildren, who are 11, 9, 7 and 5. The 11 year recently started texting me, a big surprize. Her mother knows. I keep the convo very light, talk about dogs and her hobbies and school. It tears me up every time because it reminds me of what I am missing. Sometimes I think it's worse than no contact at all.

I send gifts for birthdays, Christmas. The two older ones will get cash this year because I have no idea what to get them. I have no clue what to send the younger ones. I do text their mother to ask and those texts get answered.

Oh god, I so feel for you. You are not alone in this, though. If it weren't for this, I would not be here on SS.

 

[PointlessStruggle]

My parents had a very smooth divorce luckily, they basically just downgraded to good friends. I still see them both quite often. My aunt is in an insane asylum now but I wouldnt call her a loved one really, just family. I imagine its awful to be forced away from someone you actually care about. I am very close with my brother and would be mortified if he got like sent away somewhere.

 

[Life_and_Death]

L&D, I am so very sorry for you and your brothers. This is, IMHO, the worst. Similar situation with my grandchildren, who are 11, 9, 7 and 5. The 11 year recently started texting me, a big surprize. Her mother knows. I keep the convo very light, talk about dogs and her hobbies and school. It tears me up every time because it reminds me of what I am missing. Sometimes I think it's worse than no contact at all.

I send gifts for birthdays, Christmas. The two older ones will get cash this year because I have no idea what to get them. I have no clue what to send the younger ones. I do text their mother to ask and those texts get answered.

Oh god, I so feel for you. You are not alone in this, though. If it weren't for this, I would not be here on SS.

yeah thats about all i can do. i remind them that i love them every time we talk and sometimes even randomly message it. im sorry youre going through this too. it really is like a slow torture. i hate this and i want to go but they know nothing about it and id hate to leave them like that

 

[NeverGoodEnuff]

Yes, I know.