Seeing a therapist

[ummwhaaat]

Hello

I have social anxiety and depression, possibly anxiety too. I was on the verge of CTB a few weeks ago, but decided to try weed and it put me in a better mood, and made me book an appointment with a doctor. After that I ordered some benzos online(illegally of course) because I knew weed wouldn't be enough to get me to go there. So I did that, and went to the session and basically I am diagnosed as depressed now, and they prescribed me some SSRIs to help with anxiety and referred me to a therapist.

Now, whenever I talk to the therapist (The waiting time is up to 12 weeks, but she might have a time before then depending on many factors) is it safe to tell her about me using benzos? I am taking them regularly at this point so I suppose I am probably getting addicted to them - but without them I'd have been dead.
Another thing, I attempted to CTB about 2 years ago, can I tell her about that too - I am not suicidal currently - I do think about suicide etc, but I have no plans to do so atm.

Basically, what can/can't I say to make sure I don't get admitted to some psych ward - that is the last thing I need right now in my life.

(I don't live in the US. I live in a scandinavian country, I guess that might be relevant)

EDIT: Also I wasn't diagnosed with social anxiety because I've had it so long so I can appear very normal, especially on benzos so they probably didn't believe that part.

 

[Lullaby]

I've always been honest about my suicidal thoughts, but the key is to always mention that you don't have any plans. That's always saved me from being hospitalized, and my therapist always follows up by asking me that.

I would try to be as honest as you can about the other stuff, I feel like treatment is pretty different depending on if someone's not really that depressed vs someone's who's been struggling a lot longer.

It's okay to be upfront about stuff, but also remember to advocate for yourself. Don't ever go along or agree with something you're not comfortable with.

 

[ummwhaaat]

I plan to go to my sessions initially while using benzos because otherwise there's no way I could get out the door. I imagine I should tell her about that?

 

[Lullaby]

Someone here might have better advice, so I don't want to say for sure!

There's a confidentiality agreement and most therapists should be understanding (it's not always like that). They could tell you if it's conflicting with any medication you're taking.

I'd only be open with a therapist if I felt comfortable enough with them, so it's definitely up to you. I can talk to my current about anything, but I wasn't the same way with previous ones.

 

[chloramine]

Personally I was upfront with my therapist about my desire to die. I would never tell her if I had concrete plans because regardless of her beliefs she has a legal obligation to inform someone at that point. If you're worried about it you can ease into it and take a session or two to feel out where your therapist stands on those issues. I do think you should be as honest as you feel comfortable being because it's easier to come up with more nuanced ideas and solutions when there's more information. If that particular therapist isn't a good fit (which can happen because the therapist isn't great or you might just not click) don't be afraid to try someone else. Finding someone who works well with you can be exhausting, but it's generally worth it.

 

[Moonomyth]

You can be upfront in the initial session and say, bluntly, "There are things I am not willing to tell you about until we've established a better level of trust and rapport over several sessions." That can include benzo usage. If they respect that, so much the better. If they don't, better to find another therapist.

As other people have mentioned, you can discuss suicidal ideation as long as you appease the legal shibboleth of "No I don't have any plans at this time."

 

[Girl-shaped Wound]

You can be upfront in the initial session and say, bluntly, "There are things I am not willing to tell you about until we've established a better level of trust and rapport over several sessions." That can include benzo usage. If they respect that, so much the better. If they don't, better to find another therapist.

As other people have mentioned, you can discuss suicidal ideation as long as you appease the legal shibboleth of "No I don't have any plans at this time."

My therapist, as unhelpful as she ended up being, had no problem with setting up the trust dynamic herself. She told me that those things demand time and that I shouldn't force myself to say anything that I am not comfortable with.

I also would like to say that I've had the same experience in regard to discussing suicidal thoughts. My shrink was even okay with me pretty much saying that I have a method, but don't plan to attempt at the time. I DEFINITELY don't recommend being that open, though! Just explain that you have vague thoughts about suicide, you do not make plans, do not research methods etc.

 

[The Eeyorish One]

I'm personally very honest with my psychiatrist and therapist, but that may not always work out for others. I just felt like they could best help me with the most information possible, and if they have me committed and ruin me financially that would just push me to go through with it anyway so it's a win win either way.

I've told mine about one of my plans before, but I made sure to mention that it was extremely difficult to carry out (wanting to do it not at home so as to not scar people I care about, needing equipment, etc) and that when I get low enough to want to carry it out I'm just too tired to go through with it. I've also told them about drug use, although in my case it was legal (weed). They haven't reported me to anyone or forced me into a hospital… yet lol.