omw/2/ctb

omw/2/ctb

Nothing in his life became him like the leaving it
Mar 29, 2019
53
Again I know what I am talking about.

Please respect the thread. If you have anything else you want to say to me make it a PM or post on my profile.
 
GeorgeJL

GeorgeJL

Enlightened
Mar 7, 2019
1,621
Please respect the thread. If you have anything else you want to say to me make it a PM or post on my profile.
You were the one that originally derailed this thread and started passive aggressively condemning me. OK I'm done here but I might reply if you reply again. OP can skip our posts.
 
TheDevilsAngel

TheDevilsAngel

LetMeFree
Apr 22, 2019
768
Yes im terrified but know that scared feeling does not last if ur brave enough to do it u must remember been scared wont last its a feeling and we are all goin to die eventually just cause we want to speed up the process.......if you were sick and was dying anyway you would still be scared.....not sure how not to be scared thou
 
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omw/2/ctb

omw/2/ctb

Nothing in his life became him like the leaving it
Mar 29, 2019
53
Yes im terrified but know that scared feeling does not last if ur brave enough to do it u must remember been scared wont last its a feeling and we are all goin to die eventually just cause we want to speed up the process.......if you were sick and was dying anyway you would still be scared.....not sure how not to be scared thou

Even though I'm being very methodical in my preparations, I still worry that fear and SI will kick in at the last moment and prevent me from ctb. I know it's risky, but I'm figuring to get courage from a bottle at the end. Statistically speaking, alcohol and drugs are common factors in successful exits...and doubtless many unsuccessful ones! Double-edged sword I guess.
 
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JadedGray

JadedGray

Life Eternal
Jul 24, 2018
991
I need to CTB (I know I will) but I'm completely frightened. Is anyone else crippled with fear? If not how I do overcome it?
I used to be, but once I made my first serious attempt that I almost died from I no longer fear death just failure, especially if it causes me to end up paralyzed or in a vegetative state. Having a near death experience helps.
 
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lululoo

lululoo

Mage
Dec 15, 2018
558
I used to be, but once I made my first serious attempt that I almost died from I no longer fear death just failure, especially if it causes me to end up paralyzed or in a vegetative state. Having a near death experience helps.
How did the near death experience help? Was it peaceful so it made dying seem less scary?
 
JadedGray

JadedGray

Life Eternal
Jul 24, 2018
991
How did the near death experience help? Was it peaceful so it made dying seem less scary?
Yes, it was the best experience I've ever had. My biggest fear at the time was some sort of punishment for committing suicide, but instead there was nothingness. It was calm and peaceful. The only fear I have now is of failing.
 
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F

Fadingfast

Come in peace, go in peace
May 9, 2019
106
Yes, it was the best experience I've ever had. My biggest fear at the time was some sort of punishment for committing suicide, but instead there was nothingness. It was calm and peaceful. The only fear I have now is of failing.

My near death experience was brutal but I too felt an overwhelming sense of peace when I knew I was taking my last breathe. When I woke up in the hospital I was swinging on the drs. I was PISSED.
 
JadedGray

JadedGray

Life Eternal
Jul 24, 2018
991
My near death experience was brutal but I too felt an overwhelming sense of peace when I knew I was taking my last breathe. When I woke up in the hospital I was swinging on the drs. I was PISSED.
I was angry too, but I was too exhausted to lash out. I don't blame you though.
 
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D

Donewith_

Elementalist
Sep 28, 2018
876
Its a bit scary
 
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heartless_95

heartless_95

In the bleak midwinter ..
Sep 3, 2019
27
Hey, you're totally not alone here with this thought. My method is partial hanging and when I tried it last... It worked so well that when I was on the verge of passing out, I had a really frightening feeling creep over me mixed in with the euphoria of the oxygen deprivation from compressing my carotids. It was unlike any other feeling I ever had and hope to never have again. Like others have said here, alcohol and benzos often help to overcome this feeling, but even so it's hard to fight the SI. Hugs to you, I hope you manage to find peace no matter the outcome ❤️
 
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