Scared to Live but also to Die.

[Space Cadet]

I'm bored. I feel like I'm just treading water. I wanted to CTB but didn't have the balls so now stuck. I lost a hell of a lot of money 3-4 weeks back gambling plus quit my job as I just couldn't stand it anymore - boring and having to be around so many people. Thought it didn't matter as was planning to CTB but as I didn't am now unsure what future holds as I run out of resources and ability pay for stuff. Scary.

 

[oxymoron]

It's the fear of the unknown and it includes both living and dying.

 

[Brick In The Wall]

I'm bored. I feel like I'm just treading water. I wanted to CTB but didn't have the balls so now stuck. I lost a hell of a lot of money 3-4 weeks back gambling plus quit my job as I just couldn't stand it anymore - boring and having to be around so many people. Thought it didn't matter as was planning to CTB but as I didn't am now unsure what future holds as I run out of resources and ability pay for stuff. Scary.

Being stuck in the middle like this is very common for many. My advice would be to do what you can to improve your living situation until you've reached a definitive decision.

Finding work may be a bit tough with everything that is going on right now. But you should still atleast try. I wish you the best of luck and we're here if you need to talk!