The past 3 years have been a living nightmare for me after being diagnosed with a chronic illness and subsequently negatively affecting my depression (Was well controlled for over 25 years).
If you were to look at my life you would see I have a great home, great job, great family and great friends. But, the depression and constant agitation going on relentlessly for past 2 to 3 years are unbearable. I was hospitalised into a psychiatric unit a few months ago (Voluntary) and left it after a week as I found it made me much worse.
I have a suicide plan made - full suspension hanging with rope and noose already in position for when the time is right. My main problem is when I try to start the process of putting the rope around my neck, I see my parents faces and the devastation and pain I will cause them. I cant get past that. My parents are the most amazing people, my Dad without doubt is my best friend. Then I start thinking "But what about me? I have to stay alive suffering ensuring I will not hurt my family".
Anyone similar situation?
.
If you were to look at my life you would see I have a great home, great job, great family and great friends. But, the depression and constant agitation going on relentlessly for past 2 to 3 years are unbearable. I was hospitalised into a psychiatric unit a few months ago (Voluntary) and left it after a week as I found it made me much worse.
I have a suicide plan made - full suspension hanging with rope and noose already in position for when the time is right. My main problem is when I try to start the process of putting the rope around my neck, I see my parents faces and the devastation and pain I will cause them. I cant get past that. My parents are the most amazing people, my Dad without doubt is my best friend. Then I start thinking "But what about me? I have to stay alive suffering ensuring I will not hurt my family".
Anyone similar situation?
.
