Venting Same shit every night

[Kodama]

I easily start to sleep around 9pm, (with a lot of pills ), in a « pretty » good mood, use to wake up around 1.30am dizzy, take some pills again and fall asleep again for 2-3 hours and then wake up at 4am with very very bad toughts and very very anxious.
Impossible to sleep more.
So tired :/

 

[GinaIsReady]

Thank goodness you have pills. I am sorry about your insomnia.

 

[Kodama]

Some depressed people use to sleep a lot. Wish i was one of them :/

 

[FTL.Wanderer]

i just stay up 'til i pass out from exhaustion...

 

[Rachel74]

Pill popper here too. I add gin with mind. I still get disturbed sleep

 

[Grey-zone]

I was actually looking for an insomnia post this morning, because I couldn't sleep. The past 6 months maybe an average of 6 hours, today 3. I was doing the whole running 5 times a week, dropping push-ups, but since moving out of my parents' and living in a shit apartment my mind hasn't latched onto sleep, so I feel tired--not that the exercise got rid of my suicidal ideation, but the feeling of powerlessness and stupidity in a sleepless night certainly puts things in a new perspective of bullshit!
The interesting thing is there really isn't any effective treatment for insomnia, much like depression. The "preferred" method is (surprise!) mindfulness, failing which, medication, but neither are by any means anywhere near guaranteed. I found breathing exercises helped relax me prior to sleep, but have learned that if you wake up afterward getting back is nearly impossible (if you work).
Good luck with today man.

I have at least gained one benefit from insomnia: I'm more assertive and less nervous, probably because I'm tired enough physically that I don't care as much about life.

i just stay up 'til i pass out from exhaustion...

This is basically one of the recommended strategies, except for me at least it hasn't worked long-term.

 

[Polka]

I never had insomnia until this latest round of depression. Days with no sleep. Then I got anxiety as well as pounding heart and audible pulse. Try clonazepam and alcohol. Zopiclone was not strong enough.

Depression is bad enough but all three drag you inexorably towards the grave.

 

[sammii]

i just stay up 'til i pass out from exhaustion...

I used to do that too, because I couldn't turn my brain off. Now I've got antipsychotics that make me sleep, an hour after I take them I pass out. I'm so self-destructive tho, sometimes when I'm really anxious I purposefully don't take them and stay awake for two days straight and I genuinely have no idea why I do it.

 

[WhiteDespair]

I usually down 3mg of Melatonin early so I don't need to be awake. Then, another dose if I wake up in the middle of the night.

 

[hypo666]

One of my hospital admissions was because I had not slept for 5 days straight due to anxiety {and possibly because of the haldolperidol medication I was taking which is known to cause restlessmess}, I was in such a state I burst blood vessels in my eye. I actually think it had nothing to do with the medication now,and it was all down to my fucked up brain,. This is one of the reasons I think about suicide every day, because my messed up brain with it's crippling anxiety has done so many bad things to me, ruined my future for one. I think Iam basically finished so I don't get any opportunities now, but years back I did and what stopped me seizing them whether it be career opportunities or relationships it was this anxiety that set in.

I hate hospitals because I hate feeling vunerable and relying on others, asking for help etc etc, yet my brain drove me into such bad state I begged the doctors at the hospital to put me to sleep.

Poor sleeping causes me to fly off the handle ,snap at people, feel even more anxious .It's a horrible thing to happen.

 

[Deleted member 1465]

I exist on less than one hour a night if I'm lucky.

 

[FTL.Wanderer]

I used to do that too, because I couldn't turn my brain off. Now I've got antipsychotics that make me sleep, an hour after I take them I pass out. I'm so self-destructive tho, sometimes when I'm really anxious I purposefully don't take them and stay awake for two days straight and I genuinely have no idea why I do it.

i stay up b/c i'm afraid (really) of those moments when you're in bed waiting to become unconscious. it's a horror movie in my mind... do you ever experience that--all the bad thoughts crashing down on you at once when you close your eyes?

 

[Haku]

I know how you feel, this is why I dont go to sleep before 1am anymore. When I fall asleep, which even that is difficult sometimes, I usually get maybe 1 hour of sleep, and that's not consecutively, I wake up like 2 or 3 times in between, so the hour maybe really 30 minutes or less. So the time I try to go to sleep at is 530am or later, if I tried to go to bed at 1am, the moon would still be out, which I dont mind because I love the night, I cant stand the sun, it feels like I'm a vampire, but technically a live human one. I do take 5 pills of Unisom sleep aid a day, and it helps quite a bit, at least until my body gets accustomed to it, then I have to up my dosage, but before my body gets used to it, it adds 3 hours of sleep on top of my 1 hour, but still not consecutively, so more so like 3 hours total, not exact sometimes, more or less. But yea, I can relate, insomnias a bitch.