Venting Reflection

[The Ferryman]

Just wondering if it's... selfish to tell somebody I want to CTB, don't have many friends left (2 we still frequently talk with) and one we trust a lot but it feels like I shouldn't say anything. We don't want to upset her and she believes we have purpose but we just can't see it. Lost all our friends we've previously known from school, barely graduated high school after being an honour roll student who should've had a positive outlook on life (which was never gonna happen, been yearning for death since 12), and is just lost now, doing nothing with his life day in day out, every moment feels the same and nothing is fun anymore, will get the small happiness from doing personal interests but honestly, not being able to be hired and having no money right now is just too much. Honestly expected to die way before this but was too much of a coward to finally do something about it. Hoping to leave before having to see our grandparents again since seeing them wouldn't help the situation (our grandma fucking sucks but it's a long story.) Set us back by not getting a driver's license in 2022 since we expected to CTB back then so we're just fucked in every scenario. Is it selfish to tell somebody? Or should we just keep it to ourself?

 

[TransilvanianHunger]

No, it's not selfish to tell someone about your feelings. I might be off, but I imagine that, if you feel this need to talk to someone about it, it's because you want to find another person who can understand, listen, and relate to what you're feeling. That's a perfectly natural human desire and need, we are social animals and we don't function particularly well in total isolation. If you have people in your life that you trust enough with this information, talk to them. You deserve to be heard and understood.

 

[The Ferryman]

No, it's not selfish to tell someone about your feelings. I might be off, but I imagine that, if you feel this need to talk to someone about it, it's because you want to find another person who can understand, listen, and relate to what you're feeling. That's a perfectly natural human desire and need, we are social animals and we don't function particularly well in total isolation. If you have people in your life that you trust enough with this information, talk to them. You deserve to be heard and understood.

Yeah yeah, that's kinda why this site seems nice as a place where it can be more understood then getting the same generic response for the 200th time, thank you.

 

[FuneralCry]

I think it's understandable to want to share feelings and I don't think it's selfish at all, it's just up to you whether you want to do that. I personally wouldn't see it as the best idea as we exist in this society where suicidal people are locked in psych wards for doing that and if other people know they could potentially try to interfere in plans if one is planning to die.
People should be able to open about their feelings without those risks but sadly this is the reality. But anyway we are all in different situations after all, so it's up to you, I wish you the best.

 

[The Ferryman]

I think it's understandable to want to share feelings and I don't think it's selfish at all, it's just up to you whether you want to do that. I personally wouldn't see it as the best idea as we exist in this society where suicidal people are locked in psych wards for doing that and if other people know they could potentially try to interfere in plans if one is planning to die.
People should be able to open about their feelings without those risks but sadly this is the reality. But anyway we are all in different situations after all, so it's up to you, I wish you the best.

Yeah, she's a few hours away and knows our address which is why we're hesitant to say anything but we're hoping if we reason we can help her understand, not telling anyone else though because our family would lock us up in seconds-