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Jul 29, 2021
I just don't understand, none of us do, we live in this reality, we just exist and will never know the big reason why. We will never know why anything exists. We don't know our purpose, if we have one. We are here, possibly by chance, but we evolved by pure nature itself just to have a brain that is powerful enough to experience moments of mental pain and question the deepest things like these. We exist and some of us are afraid to die because of the unknown of what happens to consciousness after death. Some of us, for that reason, dont want to die but if you live then you will question it and be terrified. But reality makes us live and die, so we have to experience both. Nature has laws/mathematics that we can't even understand fully. We create our own language of logic and math to try to use laws of nature to solve problems but we can never know why it is, mathematics we just discover it and accept it but never know why and yet it governs us and literally everything we do. It is the reason we exist. Even if you have free will, why do you have free will? If its because of God, why does God exist?

Reality sucks, because it doesn't give the slightest grain of sand sized crap about what we think or feel, it itself is the reason we can think and question it, it governs us and it just is. It simply is and we will be in the unknown forever, maybe even after we die, if we do somehow be reborn, we will question it again and again and for all of eternity. It could of been there there was nothing instead of something and we never would of had to live to question anything or experience anything as we never existed, but there is something, and we don't know why.
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annihilation anxiety
Apr 19, 2024
Meaning isn't a necessary condition for life. I don't know if you want to talk to me about this because our views are very different but the objective meaning and purpose thing is a losing game. We can only have subjective meaning which humans create. Objective meaning isn't necessary since we live in biological world. Life exists where the conditions for it to exist are present.


Apr 10, 2024
No forgiveness in this life. Make a mistake at any point in your life and you will pay for it forever.
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What the hell I'm doing here?
Apr 9, 2024
Pay to play and play to pay. This is all that you can have here. Everything comes and goes, the living die and the most honest lie. Just a score after a score.

Thanks to whoever is the asshole that made this shit hole and double thank him if I got stuck here bcz of them, not by choice.
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Wake me up next year...
Mar 18, 2024
What other options do we have but to accept all of this? My attempts have all failed and if I fail at another one I'll be in big trouble and possibly my doctor too. I try to believe there's a God but it gets difficult when your life is so tragic. I just hope I don't have to live much longer.
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