Story Quick summary: How did you attempt to CTB and why did it fail?

[ChildrensITV]

I guess I am looking for a quick guide to what NOT to do

 

[Cryptonite]

I guess all non-recommended methods are very likely to fail, the most frequent one being overdose on regular substances. Also jumping from a short height, low doses of SN, partial hanging, superficial cuts etc. On the other hand, recommended doses of SN, jumping from more than 10 stories on hard surface, full hanging, nitrogen are likely to succeed.

Generally, a majority of failed attempts are due to survival instinct.

 

[Viranamari]

There are some people who CTB not because they want to but because it's a cry forn help. They might not attempt CTB impulsively but rather with the intent of harming themself severely but not enough to cause death. That is one reason why one might fail to do so. Another reason is that they impulsively used an unreliable method. And lastly, many people fail due to survival instinct.

 

[redbathingduck]

Once I overdosed on nortrilen (TCA) and started hallucinating and apparently ended up picking up the phone during that, causing the crisis team to find out and bring me to the hospital. I have like no memories of it happening but that's what I've been told. Regardless I should have waited for a better moment to od and not during the middle of the day, but desperation got the best of me. No clue if I would have died without hospital interference because I didn't really do sufficient research but I did have to stay for a few days.

Anyway what I'm trying to say is to not get impatient because it can cause people to find you too early, and make sure your plan is well thought out. Overdosing can be hard in general cause often there's a lot of time and room for doubt after you did the overdose, depending on what you use of course

 

[ScissorYoda]

I have never attempted (I like to think I'll only attempt once, and do it properly) the closest I got was traveling to a site to jump from height, but SI was way too strong.

 

[lostmouse93]

I tried to overdose on over the counter meds. I didn't know that my body would make me puke them up against my will. I don't recommend this method still because it's really not that effective

 

[Unwr!tten]

I mean, without AEs, the body would reject SN, too.

 

[redtruck1]

I mean, without AEs, the body would reject SN, too.

I thought I'd heard stories of people not taking AE's and still having success with SN?
Tried to OD on ativan, hydrocodone and alcohol. It's way harder to OD than I thought.

 

[Callie Arcale]

Tried partial. Wasn't successful. Could not pass out. Had major anxiety and cried uncontrollably.

 

[thatlatealready]

I've tried a number of things, some of them several times: yew poisoning, propranolol overdose, paracetamol overdose, jumping in front of a train, and hanging. They've all failed either due to random chance, being caught in the act, something going wrong, or poor implementation. I was in my early - mid teens when I tried some of them, and I was much too stupid to properly implement certain techniques.

Also, as a kid, I tried jumping out of a window on the 2nd floor, taking small overdoses, and eating batteries. Obviously none of those worked and I'm hesitant to even count them as real attempts, but the intention to die was definitely there.

 

[midnightmadness]

As a teenager, I tried to od on a mix of prescription and otc medications, but didn't know anything about dosages or ae…I was discovered some 10 hours later and taken to the hospital and spent a week in the ICU. Don't know how it would've turned out without hospital intervention.
ODing is harder than it sounds and is statistically improbable on most accessible substances. Now I know

 

[Cornelius777]

Long time ago I tried overdosing on benzos mixed with alcohol. Wish I had done more reasearch. I Blacked out, woke up in my room safe and sound. So i panicked and tried to slith my wrists the same evening, yet the knife i had taken in a dizzy rush was super dull, and even with my whole strenght i didnt get far. I had left home and had no other ideas in mi d so I gave up. I see those scars on my wrist every day and remember what a freaking fail that was.

After that i have tried going to places where i could jump, or tried putting a noose around my neck but i pussy out every time. But i think evnetually i could work up the courage.

 

[bluebus]

Long time ago I tried overdosing on benzos mixed with alcohol. Wish I had done more reasearch. I Blacked out, woke up in my room safe and sound. So i panicked and tried to slith my wrists the same evening, yet the knife i had taken in a dizzy rush was super dull, and even with my whole strenght i didnt get far. I had left home and had no other ideas in mi d so I gave up. I see those scars on my wrist every day and remember what a freaking fail that was.

After that i have tried going to places where i could jump, or tried putting a noose around my neck but i pussy out every time. But i think evnetually i could work up the courage.

I'm sorry that you are going through all this. I can't imagine the pain of waking up when all you wanted was to fade away from existence. I really hope you can find some peace. Maybe look into some methods that don't "scare" you. I know for a fact that I could never jump or hang. I really hope you can better. But if not, I wish you the best of luck on your journey

 

[byebyemadworld]

When I was 22 I tried to slit my wrists with a razor blade. Started with the left one and found out that that method is so much harder than they made it look on TV. I made a few cuts that weren't deep enough and not at the right spot. There was no tall building to jump from so I went to the hospital to get stitches.
I was in a psychiatric clinic for a few days, then went home to my parents, who didn't really know what to do about my failed attempt (it was more a cry for help).
Now it's 20 years later, I look at the scars and wish I succeeded.
My life is bad because of my own fault. I'm sick now and looking into methods. I'm in a bit of a hurry and afraid of an attempt failing.

 

[ThisUnrest]

When I was in my 20s I took 60 Benadryls, not knowing that OTC meds are built to not let you OD. Was stumbling, hearing whispers, had slow breathing and difficulty talking. Was taken to the hospital, they made me drink gross liquid charcoal. They kept me overnight with a guard by my bed and then let me out the next day when I said it was just a stupid mistake.

 

[watchdog]

When I was 13, I tried hanging myself. It was very impulsive and I didn't do much research. I tied the rope incorrectly and it came undone, lol.

 

[Orbitc]

I took several hundred digoxin tablets but vomited it - I didn't know at this time that I needed anti-vomit tablets. It was terribly painful and I passed out and vomited and inhaled the vomit. Then the acid caused irritation in the lungs, in my nose and mouth - how disgusting it was to regain consciousness later. I was afraid to call an ambulance because I thought they would understand that it was a suicide attempt. I made my heart even sicker.

 

[RainLover]

When I was 16 I got drunk and my plans were jumping but I committed the error of sending some friends a goodbye message, one of my friends called the police

 

[Ico]

I was 16 and in the midst of (what I know now was) severe Autistic burnout. Got into my car (a 1978 Mercury Monarch) to go somewhere, realized that I had no one to turn to, so I just sat there in the family garage. Eventually I just fell asleep. Nice and peaceful...until I woke up in a Hospital.

Apparently, my family came home early from my Sister's band practice. For once, the spoiled brat decided against going to Dairy Queen afterwards.

Family opened the garage door, figured out what was going on, then the one parent trained in CPR (the same one that repeatedly abused me) managed to rescuscitate me (heart had stopped). I spent a week in the ICU to flush out all the carbon monoxide, and was locked away in a psych ward for 5 months. It took me THAT long to fake my way out.

Thanks to my Sister's decision to not have dessert (trust me, she's not one to pass up free food), I've had to live with brain damage in this sensory hellscape that only gets worse as you get older (shit starts HURTING). Working a job I hate in order to continue to pay bills until I die.

Cars now have catalytic converters to prevent doing what I did. Back then, all I had to do was run a hose from the exhaust to the interior of the car. Funny the sort of facts you pick up when you're living your own afterlife.

Not many options for CO2 poisoning now, but I do have a whole house generator with a CO Sensor that supposedly can be bypassed by connecting a few wires together. One Reddit post said they've gotten away with covering the sensor with tape. Just knowing that it's sitting in my garage waiting to run gives me a bit of comfort.

 

[mob]

Whatever you do, DO NOT attempt to overdose on any painkillers. Extremely painful and not realiable since you'd have to take a really, really huge amount to ctb - also you'd throw it back up.

14 year old pill-addicted me decided that overdosing on Ibuprofen would work. It would HAVE to work since I didn't see any other way out, and my abusive mom would find out about my bad grades the next day - which means I would get my ass beat. Also I was severely depressed and suicidal.

Anyway, walked to the pharmacy and bought 50 Ibuprofen with the little money I had. Pharmacist looked at me sceptically. Went home, took them and passed out after just a little while. Woke up, immediately projectile vomited everwhere. Vomiting didn't stop for two days. Someone called an ambulance and I somehow managed to convince the doctors that I did not mean to kill myself, which I clearly did. Two weeks in the psych ward.

Honestly, I wish it would've worked back then but like I said, painkillers like Ibuprofen and Paracetamol won't work and would only mess up your liver or something.