Ive talked a bit on here about fentanyl overdose which is still most likely going to be my method but I hate the idea of how quick it would be. The quickness is exactly why even though I have a shotgun, I dont want to use it. Neither of those methods would be painful because of how rapidly they work but I often feel like id be willing to trade that painlessness for the opportunity to have a slower death in a hospital bed. Inducing a prolonged death would completely minimize SI for me as well. I know acetaminophen overdose is painful and no fun but I think I might just take 5-6000mg a day until my liver begins failing and I have to go to the hospital. I also have atleast a few drinks every night so im sure that would speed it up a bit. I would just act confused like I have no idea whats going on. They would obviously see crazy high levels of paracetamol on my blood panel but I would just deny everything and try to refuse charcoal or any treatment that isnt pain management. Im guessing they would If im lucky, I would be dead within a week or two with most of my pain taken care of and the opportunity to say goodbye to loved ones. Anyone have any opinions on this?
Although I do often self harm because I feel like I deserve it, my motivations for this are entirely different. First of all, SI sucks and will make it very hard to go through with a quick method like fent or a shotgun. I also think the idea of instant death like with the shotgun is scary. Theres not a conceivable gap of time between when the triggers pulled and loss of consciousness which although painless, I dont like. Lastly this would give me the chance to say goodbye to my family and get all my affairs in order before I go plus I could get fucked up on some good pain meds while im in the hospital lol
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