
bnkshawty
Member
- Apr 5, 2025
- 50
i started sh when i was in grade 6 or so. i had met a much older boy who cut, and he would show me the images that are so imprinted in my mind to this day. During that time (probably most of my life, though, lol), I had no actual friends. I was bullied, my dad was absent, and my mom was busy with my other siblings. I had a lot of isolation and unlimited screen time. I felt very abnormal from a young age, and i never really related to anyone. i didnt realize till i got into hs that sh was actually very bad, but at that point it was very much too late. my thighs and arms were alr filled w keloids. when i used to cut my parents didnt take me to get stitches so id use black duct tape to cover my own injuries i tried telling an adult in my family but i had regreted it instantly. i forgave my family for there treatment towards the situation, but there "lack of knowledge" became less believable as i feel u can always learn something if u try. anyways i always cut, since child now adult i still cut i cant stop its so very comforting the thought of it kind of salvates my mouth. i dated a man recently who was interested in knife play but also didn't want me to cut unless it was him. anyways the point of this whole ahh paragraph was im so curious how this works how does one js enjoy cutting there skin is it because of the false "rush" i get before ??