Venting Psychiatric abuse destroyed my life

[killedbypsychiatry]

A psychiatrist prescribed a drug I didn't need at all nor want, that ended up causing me severe neurological damage and permanent sexual dysfunction. I went from being a super happy and healthy, smart and passionate teen to bedridden, and severely ill. I'm going to loose my life because of her. Yet when I told her about the adverse reaction she ghosted and then blocked me. After that I decided to leave an online review and she proceeded to censor the review I left and delete all of my comments. I feel so abused and angry at the injustice. How can she get away with destroying my life?! How is this legal!? I don't understand :( and it makes me so traumatized and angry.

I think I have ptsd about my experience with psychiatry due to all the coercion, abuse, gaslighting, and forced drugging I suffered from. Since I was 13 I was forcefully drugged with strong psychotropic drugs againt my will. I was coerced, gaslighted, abused by the psychiatric system. Most nights I have nightmares about what she did to me and I have constant flashbacks. I also have to deal with the grief of loosing my health, emotions, sexuality, basically what made me human. And I don't know how that deal with the trauma and anger / impotence about what she did is so huge and I don't know how to deal with it.

I just needed to vent.

 

[Lucien]

How are you sure it's legal? Medical malpractice can be taken to court. It applies to psychiatrists.

 

[killedbypsychiatry]

How are you sure it's legal? Medical malpractice can be taken to court. It applies to psychiatrists.

It is extremely hard to sue a psychiatrist or big pharma. For example many people who've also developed permanent sexual dysfunction and try to sue can't because they are told the sexual dysfunction is psychosomatic when clearly isn't. psychiatrist can keep gaslighting you with their subjective diagnosis to protect themselves.

 

[Lucien]

It is extremely hard to sue a psychiatrist or big pharma. For example many people who've also developed permanent sexual dysfunction and try to sue can't because they are told the sexual dysfunction is psychosomatic when clearly isn't. psychiatrist can keep gaslighting you with their subjective diagnosis to protect themselves.

Could be anywhere from hard to impossible of a battle to wage. It's certainly reasonable that it's not the first thing on your mind. I don't have rich legal knowledge but waiting too long after the fact can shut that door entirely.

Whether legally backed up or not it sounds like abuse. The deleting comments/blocking you bit sounds like she recognises things can escalate.

 

[rs929]

Is it sertraline

 

[killedbypsychiatry]

Is it sertraline

yes, horrible poison

 

[rs929]

How long did you take it? (I've been on it 13 years)

 

[killedbypsychiatry]

How long did you take it? (I've been on it 13 years)

4 months, I had taken other psych drugs before tho mainly Prozac and agomelatine but Zoloft was what caused me pssd and neurotoxicity

 

[bad luck]

The pharmaceutical industry has bought in many unscrupulous psychiatrists. I also feel mistreated by psychiatry and by the amount of drugs they sent me. They all made me addicted and I've been taking them for years, but I'm not getting better. Sometimes a few months and then again depression.

 

[rs929]

Have you seen other kind of docs? Like, neurologists? What have they told you?
I'm curious about your condition. I know about PSSD and I don't know whether I'll have it or not because I have depression plus OCD so it's likely that I'll take these pills forever. But sertraline causing you permanent brain damage the way you describe is something I've never heard of

 

[killedbypsychiatry]

Have you seen other kind of docs? Like, neurologists? What have they told you?
I'm curious about your condition. I know about PSSD and I don't know whether I'll have it or not because I have depression plus OCD so it's likely that I'll take these pills forever. But sertraline causing you permanent brain damage the way you describe is something I've never heard of

There's not many doctors who are aware of the dangers of this drugs, mostly because what they are told by pharma reps and because medical school is basically pharmacy school in western countries but there's a few toxicologist, neurologist and psychiatrist who are indeed aware of this. I've talked with a toxicologist, two psychiatrist, and neurologist and they all agreed I have toxic encephalitis because of the SSRI. There's many Facebook groups of people struggling with this. However not everyone gets it and most people get disabled once they withdrew from the drug. If you won't be stopping I doubt you'll have the issues I'm having and if you do want to ever stop personally I'll recommend you to taper very very slowly and if you get issues, stop.

 

[Silver]

@disfiguredone that is shocking, I'm so sorry that has happened :(

 

[killedbypsychiatry]

I'm so sorry this happened to you. So sorry you are so young when it happened. I want to scream from frustration for you and all of us whose lives were essentially f****ed when we placed our trust in these inhuman narcissistic robots they call "professionals."

My body and mind were also ruined by a psychiatric med last year. My first psychiatrist, first med. I was 50. physically fit, attractive, healthy, no history of mental illness, seeking help for anxiety and insomnia due to relatives health crisis and a bad breakup. Referred by my therapist. Never suicidal in my life. 30 minutes with that psychiatrist and I'm diagnosed bi-polar (saw records - he didn't say that to my face) and put on a powerful anti-psychotic. I had no idea what the drug was, I trusted doctors bc I had no health problems before this and I just wanted to sleep and feel better. Within 10 days, I felt like I had a stroke, I felt brain-dead and was having constant panic attacks, and stopped sleeping, and my memory and cognition ability was just GONE. But the worst part is the drug triggered a skin disease that OVERNIGHT destroyed all the elastin in my skin - so it hangs like a 90 year old's and I have no muscle tone, it's honestly like I lost 100 lbs just a big bag of loose skin a d I have to wear compression garments to hold myself together...and now it's on my face and I've aged 15 years in a few months. I also lost all my hair. My face could look 90 years old in a few years, according to doctors, as when you have no elastin, your skin just stretches bc of gravity. All people with this disease become hideously deformed, there's no treatment.

overnight I lost my profession, my health, my womanhood, my youth, my sexuality (I've been in abusive relationships and was finally healing and starting to date and now no one will ever touch me again bc I am grotesque), the mind fuckery that is a looming deformity (depression and anxiety from grief and terror of the future) plus the cognitive brain death has robbed me of making a living, I have no resources nor does my family, I was a single mom and my two sons have distanced themselves bc they cannot bear to see me suffer. Over the past year, I've really tried to hold on to hope, trying to eat and walk and look for work but it just gets worse every day - I can see the changes ( I obsessively track them and the visual record is BIZARRE bc I'm literally melting) and now I've lost all hope and I want to CTB both because I have no pleasure or quality of life, just fear of which is hilarious bc I did something very specific that is way beyond my ability now and I have no skills well, I save myself I am in bed 23 hours a day, annot work in my profession (am a lawyer) as my cognitive ability is zero, and the skin disease also damages all your internal organs so they say I will need lung transplant etc in a few years.

People distance themselves bc it's too ugly and strange, they hate to see me suffer, I moved in with my brother, lost my home and car, disability insurance was denied bc the psychiatrist was so vague and covering his ass in the records and didn't record objective findings of my depression, I never leave me room anymore bc I am absolutely terrified of this world and the lack of empathy people have. I could never have IMAGINED this world of suffering. Now all I have is the deepest respect for all of us who are fighting through these days, suffering while people tell us we just need to "want to get better." The enormous insensitivity of people I have come across since I got sick is truly incomprehensible.

The grief is so immense.
I am so sorry I did not mean to post all that - I hit send by mistake - didn't want to high jack the thread - was going to post my story somewhere-was still editing - my apologies for the rambling!!!!!!!

You don't have to apologize at all of sharing your story, you deserve for it to be heard!!! what we've been through is unimaginably unfair, abusive, and horrible. I'm so so sorry you where also abused by this stupid narcissistic egoistic robots!!! I so relate to everything you said, the grief, anger, being scared about all the lack of empathy In the world, and our lives going from good to nightmare in a matter of months... and all we did was seek help! So so unfair and abusive. There's truly no words to describe what this people have done to us. I also scream and shout when I think about all the harm the pseudoscientific psychiatric industry has caused. The injustice of it all drives me crazy. And it's so horrible what they do and all the gaslighting they do to us after we've been harmed. If you ever want to talk, feel free to send me a message. Sending strength and I so wish things get easier somehow, although I completely recognize how terribly hard it is to live with a damaged brain and body :(

 

[disfiguredone]

Thank you so very much for your reply - it's the first time since this happened that I told my story and felt that I was actually believed and not judged or placated. I cried with relief when I read your words. I'm just so sorry that you are also fighting this pain and I send you all my compassion. That was my first post so I'll look forward to messaging you when I can! I am a bit clueless as to how everything works on the site as far as pms, chat etc lol
On the medical malpractice front, I used to defend physicians against medical practice (I'm no expert but spent a few years in this area) and I saw how hard it was to prove a case against psychiatrists and big pharma - the victim is viewed automatically as an untrustworthy narrator and the records are specifically engineered to avoid all liability.

 

[Trisolaris]

A psychiatrist prescribed a drug I didn't need at all nor want, that ended up causing me severe neurological damage and permanent sexual dysfunction. I went from being a super happy and healthy, smart and passionate teen to bedridden, and severely ill. I'm going to loose my life because of her. Yet when I told her about the adverse reaction she ghosted and then blocked me. After that I decided to leave an online review and she proceeded to censor the review I left and delete all of my comments. I feel so abused and angry at the injustice. How can she get away with destroying my life?! How is this legal!? I don't understand :( and it makes me so traumatized and angry.

I think I have ptsd about my experience with psychiatry due to all the coercion, abuse, gaslighting, and forced drugging I suffered from. Since I was 13 I was forcefully drugged with strong psychotropic drugs againt my will. I was coerced, gaslighted, abused by the psychiatric system. Most nights I have nightmares about what she did to me and I have constant flashbacks. I also have to deal with the grief of loosing my health, emotions, sexuality, basically what made me human. And I don't know how that deal with the trauma and anger / impotence about what she did is so huge and I don't know how to deal with it.

I just needed to vent.

I know how you feel. Psychiatry ruined my life as well.

 

[killedbypsychiatry]

Thank you so very much for your reply - it's the first time since this happened that I told my story and felt that I was actually believed and not judged or placated. I cried with relief when I read your words. I'm just so sorry that you are also fighting this pain and I send you all my compassion. That was my first post so I'll look forward to messaging you when I can! I am a bit clueless as to how everything works on the site as far as pms, chat etc lol
On the medical malpractice front, I used to defend physicians against medical practice (I'm no expert but spent a few years in this area) and I saw how hard it was to prove a case against psychiatrists and big pharma - the victim is viewed automatically as an untrustworthy narrator and the records are specifically engineered to avoid all liability.

I'm so glad it brought relief, I completely get what you say about being judged, placated or victim blamed when speaking the sad truth about what has happened to us. Something that has helped me a bit is talking with other psychiatry survivors in Facebook groups and r/Antipsychiatry (Reddit), it sometimes helps to share our stories with others who understand and know that we aren't alone.

it's so terrible how they they keep using their unscientific diagnosis to gaslight harmed patients who want to sue, it's extremely unfair and evil. I wanted to sue but I know it's almost impossible I'll get justice, and the country I live in makes it much harder.

I'm also very sorry for the pain that has been inflicted on you and I also send all of my compassion back and a big hug

I know how you feel. Psychiatry ruined my life as well.

I'm very very sorry :( such a crime! Makes me so angry how many lives are destroyed. There's many members here because of psychiatry. Sending compassion and strength.

 

[EmptyManForever]

Hey I know exactly how you feel because my life was also destroyed by psychiatry, I also was given psych meds at a younger age and I too blindly trusted these
" professionals " and I also went from an energetic person, full of life and emotion , smart and attractive to a zombie basically, in a vegetative state for about 4 years now , I have no motivation left to do anything , I feel crippled, lethargic, and basically like shit , and when I explained to the psychiatrist that what he did was wrong and that I suffered from all the side effects , he didn't even admit that he did something wrong , he just told me that my mental illness is getting worse and now it's the depression speaking ,that's how they manipulate you into taking more meds which harm you, and it's sad that messing up someone's beautiful mind with psych meds is "legal " , this is what the modern society is all about, they want us to be like robots, take our meds and be like slaves to the system , that's what life is like in this century, and to make my life even worse , now that I'm messed up , nobody gives a shit about me , not even my parents, I feel super alone

 

[Musketeer]

if worse comes to worse light a fire under her ass by naming her in your suicide note (assuming your going for it)

 

[Trisolaris]

Hey I know exactly how you feel because my life was also destroyed by psychiatry, I also was given psych meds at a younger age and I too blindly trusted these
" professionals " and I also went from an energetic person, full of life and emotion , smart and attractive to a zombie basically, in a vegetative state for about 4 years now , I have no motivation left to do anything , I feel crippled, lethargic, and basically like shit , and when I explained to the psychiatrist that what he did was wrong and that I suffered from all the side effects , he didn't even admit that he did something wrong , he just told me that my mental illness is getting worse and now it's the depression speaking ,that's how they manipulate you into taking more meds which harm you, and it's sad that messing up someone's beautiful mind with psych meds is "legal " , this is what the modern society is all about, they want us to be like robots, take our meds and be like slaves to the system , that's what life is like in this century, and to make my life even worse , now that I'm messed up , nobody gives a shit about me , not even my parents, I feel super alone

Yeah they never believe you when you say the meds are responsible. It's always the illness. Psychiatry is such backwards medicine, if you can call it that at all.

 

[Meditation guide]

Many of these drugs are extremely dangerous, more so than even street drugs. I'm sorry for what you have been through but I can't say I'm the least bit surprised. I've heard and read a lot of horror stories about them.

 

[Chemicalcastration20]

A psychiatrist prescribed a drug I didn't need at all nor want, that ended up causing me severe neurological damage and permanent sexual dysfunction. I went from being a super happy and healthy, smart and passionate teen to bedridden, and severely ill. I'm going to loose my life because of her. Yet when I told her about the adverse reaction she ghosted and then blocked me. After that I decided to leave an online review and she proceeded to censor the review I left and delete all of my comments. I feel so abused and angry at the injustice. How can she get away with destroying my life?! How is this legal!? I don't understand :( and it makes me so traumatized and angry.

I think I have ptsd about my experience with psychiatry due to all the coercion, abuse, gaslighting, and forced drugging I suffered from. Since I was 13 I was forcefully drugged with strong psychotropic drugs againt my will. I was coerced, gaslighted, abused by the psychiatric system. Most nights I have nightmares about what she did to me and I have constant flashbacks. I also have to deal with the grief of loosing my health, emotions, sexuality, basically what made me human. And I don't know how that deal with the trauma and anger / impotence about what she did is so huge and I don't know how to deal with it.

I just needed to vent.

So sorry to hear your story I really feel for you and anyone else that is living this evil suffering from psychiatric drugs. I am in the same boat, serious brain damage and permanent sexual dysfunction had it for 2 years now, Destroyed my whole life.. Each seconds it utter torture no words can describe it.

 

[killedbypsychiatry]

if worse comes to worse light a fire under her ass by naming her in your suicide note (assuming your going for it)

Ohh she's definitely going to be in that note...

Hey I know exactly how you feel because my life was also destroyed by psychiatry, I also was given psych meds at a younger age and I too blindly trusted these
" professionals " and I also went from an energetic person, full of life and emotion , smart and attractive to a zombie basically, in a vegetative state for about 4 years now , I have no motivation left to do anything , I feel crippled, lethargic, and basically like shit , and when I explained to the psychiatrist that what he did was wrong and that I suffered from all the side effects , he didn't even admit that he did something wrong , he just told me that my mental illness is getting worse and now it's the depression speaking ,that's how they manipulate you into taking more meds which harm you, and it's sad that messing up someone's beautiful mind with psych meds is "legal " , this is what the modern society is all about, they want us to be like robots, take our meds and be like slaves to the system , that's what life is like in this century, and to make my life even worse , now that I'm messed up , nobody gives a shit about me , not even my parents, I feel super alone

Hey I'm so sorry you're also suffering :( and that psychiatry also destroyed your life, such a horrible crime! I relate to everything you said, going from full of life to a sick zombie and people not believing what happened. Makes me furious psychiatrist then keep gaslighting and don't accept what they did to us. Ahhhhh I want to shout!! The injustice of this makes me beyond angry. Sending compassion and strength.

So sorry to hear your story I really feel for you and anyone else that is living this evil suffering from psychiatric drugs. I am in the same boat, serious brain damage and permanent sexual dysfunction had it for 2 years now, Destroyed my whole life.. Each seconds it utter torture no words can describe it.

I'm extremely sorry you where also damaged :,( !!! it's definitely utter torture what we're put through! How the f*ck is this legal!

 

[Final_frontier]

I think I know you from the subreddit r/PSSD. I'm in that group as well. Man, are there only a handful of people around the world with this condition, because I see the same people on Reddit, PSSD forums, PSSD Facebook group and here as well.

 

[Celerity]

Contact Mad in America and tell your story.

Home

Mad in America’s mission is to serve as a catalyst for rethinking psychiatric care in the United States (and abroad). We believe that the current drug-based paradigm of care has failed our society, and that scientific research, as well as the lived experience of those who have been diagnosed...

www.madinamerica.com

 

[killedbypsychiatry]

Contact Mad in America and tell your story.

Home

Mad in America’s mission is to serve as a catalyst for rethinking psychiatric care in the United States (and abroad). We believe that the current drug-based paradigm of care has failed our society, and that scientific research, as well as the lived experience of those who have been diagnosed...

www.madinamerica.com

I love Mad in America! I've actually been thinking about submitting my story, I just need to get a bit of mental energy back, my brain is fried

 

[Georgiana Darcy]

A psychiatrist prescribed a drug I didn't need at all nor want, that ended up causing me severe neurological damage and permanent sexual dysfunction. I went from being a super happy and healthy, smart and passionate teen to bedridden, and severely ill. I'm going to loose my life because of her. Yet when I told her about the adverse reaction she ghosted and then blocked me. After that I decided to leave an online review and she proceeded to censor the review I left and delete all of my comments. I feel so abused and angry at the injustice. How can she get away with destroying my life?! How is this legal!? I don't understand :( and it makes me so traumatized and angry.

I think I have ptsd about my experience with psychiatry due to all the coercion, abuse, gaslighting, and forced drugging I suffered from. Since I was 13 I was forcefully drugged with strong psychotropic drugs againt my will. I was coerced, gaslighted, abused by the psychiatric system. Most nights I have nightmares about what she did to me and I have constant flashbacks. I also have to deal with the grief of loosing my health, emotions, sexuality, basically what made me human. And I don't know how that deal with the trauma and anger / impotence about what she did is so huge and I don't know how to deal with it.

I just needed to vent.

I am so incredibly sorry to hear this, kiddo. It happened to me, too, but as a grown woman. Drugging kids should be illegal, and psychiatrists who do that should be taken to court. I am also very open for guillotining them. Most of them don´t deserve better. Almost all of them are sadistic drug pushers.

How are you sure it's legal? Medical malpractice can be taken to court. It applies to psychiatrists.

Well, in theory you are completely right, but do you have the financial and emotional resources to take them to court, and endure years of legal procedure?

Many of these drugs are extremely dangerous, more so than even street drugs. I'm sorry for what you have been through but I can't say I'm the least bit surprised. I've heard and read a lot of horror stories about them.

I could not agree more. Psychiatrists are more dangerous than street drug dealers. At least a LSD, cocaine or heroin dealer will be honest: he/she knows is dangerous poison, and will not pretend it will "cure" you. And at least, you´re buying it voluntarily - in contrast to forced medication.

Contact Mad in America and tell your story.

Home

Mad in America’s mission is to serve as a catalyst for rethinking psychiatric care in the United States (and abroad). We believe that the current drug-based paradigm of care has failed our society, and that scientific research, as well as the lived experience of those who have been diagnosed...

www.madinamerica.com

This "Anatomy of an Epidemic" is also great. Whitaker is a bloody hero.

 

[killedbypsychiatry]

I am so incredibly sorry to hear this, kiddo. It happened to me, too, but as a grown woman. Drugging kids should be illegal, and psychiatrists who do that should be taken to court. I am also very open for guillotining them. Most of them don´t deserve better. Almost all of them are sadistic drug pushers.

I am deeply sorry it also happened to you :( such a crime. I completely agree drugging kids should de illegal and also adults when no informed consent is given. And I am also very open to guillotining them XD for the sake of humanity! Sadistic drug pushers is a very good way to describe them, all they care is money and power, they don't care about harming their patients and destroying lives, sociopaths

Psychiatrists are more dangerous than street drug dealers. At least a LSD, cocaine or heroin dealer will be honest: he/she knows is dangerous poison, and will not pretend it will "cure" you. And at least, you´re buying it voluntarily - in contrast to forced medication.

Exactly!!! Peter Breggin, (critical) psychiatrist from Harvard says "going to a psychiatrist has become one of the most dangerous things a person can do".

 

[Georgiana Darcy]

I am deeply sorry it also happened to you :( such a crime. I completely agree drugging kids should de illegal and also adults when no informed consent is given. And I am also very open to guillotining them XD for the sake of humanity! Sadistic drug pushers is a very good way to describe them, all they care is money and power, they don't care about harming their patients and destroying lives, sociopaths

Exactly!!! Peter Breggin, (critical) psychiatrist from Harvard says "going to a psychiatrist has become one of the most dangerous things a person can do".

Tbf, reading all these stories here makes me so incredibly furious. I have not been part of this forum for a very long time, but most people seem to be kind, caring, intelligent individuals. How fucked-up is this world that so many great people want to kill themselves?

I have a suggestion: let´s not ctb – let´s organize. The problem is: we are all suffering alone. We don´t have a powerful public voice. We don´t have a powerful organization fighting for our rights. We are not a movement.

I believe in united we stand, divided we fall. I`m an old leftie. I came of age in a powerful movement that smashed the second neo-fascist wave in 1990s Europe – the anti-Nazi movement. I believe that victory comes through collective power.

Aren´t we millions? Millions who suffer from depression, anxiety, autoimmune diseases, encounters with sociopaths/sadists/vicious narcicists, trauma, or psychosomatic illness? Alone, we are powerless. Together, we could move mountains. Together, we could force the passing of new laws. Together, we could force the health care system to change (adopt complementary medicine as standard treatment, for example). Toegether, we could destroy what is destroying us.

Let´s not ctb. Let´s get mad. Let´s get even.​

 

[Lucien]

Tbf, reading all these stories here makes me so incredibly furious. I have not been part of this forum for a very long time, but most people seem to be kind, caring, intelligent individuals. How fucked-up is this world that so many great people want to kill themselves?

I have a suggestion: let´s not ctb – let´s organize. The problem is: we are all suffering alone. We don´t have a powerful public voice. We don´t have a powerful organization fighting for our rights. We are not a movement.

I believe in united we stand, divided we fall. I`m an old leftie. I came of age in a powerful movement that smashed the second neo-fascist wave in 1990s Europe – the anti-Nazi movement. I believe that victory comes through collective power.

Aren´t we millions? Millions who suffer from depression, anxiety, autoimmune diseases, encounters with sociopaths/sadists/vicious narcicists, trauma, or psychosomatic illness? Alone, we are powerless. Together, we could move mountains. Together, we could force the passing of new laws. Together, we could force the health care system to change (adopt complementary medicine as standard treatment, for example). Toegether, we could destroy what is destroying us.

Let´s not ctb. Let´s get mad. Let´s get even.​

I'm sure the depressed masses will have tremendous luck wrangling the rattlesnakes in political power. Also there's the mother of all recessions waiting around the corner. When corpses pile up there are going to be tangible changes either way.

If you have passion you could organize no matter what anyone says, I suppose.

 

[Georgiana Darcy]

I'm sure the depressed masses will have tremendous luck wrangling the rattlesnakes in political power. Also there's the mother of all recessions waiting around the corner. When corpses pile up there are going to be tangible changes either way.

If you have passion you could organize no matter what anyone says, I suppose.

Post-covid will be the age of unrest, so there will be masses anyway. I remember once reading that depression is aggression turned inwards. What about turning it outwards? A nice little uprising would do many of us a world of good.

I don`t think this is about luck. It´s about the power of unity, and collective action.