Jodes
Enlightened
- Nov 23, 2018
- 1,261
I didnt realise there were any seriously dodgy people here!Been twice, the other patients you meet are a bit like the users on this forum.
I didnt realise there were any seriously dodgy people here!Been twice, the other patients you meet are a bit like the users on this forum.
If you weren't suicidal before you went in there it would be enough to make you suicidal. In which country is this?Honestly, even just reading the title of your thread made me shudder. I just wanted to see what other peoples experience has been. I literally have nightmares about my time in the psych ward. It's the worst possible outcome for me.
I've been a couple of times for shorter stays, but the absolute worst was when I was 19. I took a shit ton of ibuprofen, and kept taking them even as I threw them up. I was found too early, and woke up in the hospital three days later. I had respiration pneumonia and still have crap lung capacity, but luckily, no major lasting liver damage. I spent a week in ICU then was sent to psych for three weeks.
My roommate was a girl who believed she could talk to God, and she would be screaming and yelling prayers and nonsense all hours. We weren't allowed phones, computers, or anything like that. We had to earn the privilege to do crafts and to go outside on a fenced in balcony for short periods of time. The food was absolutely disgusting. The doctors were condescending and dismissive, and were rarely around, which is part of why I was there for three weeks. The nurses would come in and shine flashlights in your face every 30 minutes at night.
Some of the other patients were nice, but many were loud, cruel, filthy, and even borderline dangerous. The staff would only step in if someone was getting violent. One older woman there kept trying to convince me to have sex with her. Another man constantly yelled at me that my suicide attempt was a bid for attention. I was either surrounded by the scent of patients who didn't care about personal hygiene, or that sanitation cleaner they used, the scent of which literally haunts me (I get panic attacks and anxiety having to go to any doctors office or clinic now,so I just don't go).
Therapy was a joke, and was very religious. It wasn't even a Catholic hospital or anything, but the other patients did NOT like that I am not religious, and the staff made no attempt to take that into consideration. T I had no privacy... there are no locks and other patients can easily barge in while you're in the shower or bathroom. I was warned of male patients wandering into my room, but luckily that never happened to me. The worst part was feeling so very, very trapped. I felt like I was suffocating every second of every day. I'm actually hyperventilating a little just writing about it, so I'm going to stop, but I will say that Psych is a NIGHTMARE. The only way you can get out is by playing their games and lying to the doctors, and frankly, if I survive again, I just won't bother.
If you weren't suicidal before you went in there it would be enough to make you suicidal. In which country is this?
thanks for sharing....this sounds awful, worse then hellI was in once and would never go in again as I found it to be an unpleasant experience and, more importantly, POINTLESS.
I voluntarily admitted myself about 5 years ago due to severe anxiety and depression, combined with a slew of physical health issues that were making my mental health deteriorate even further but that the medical doctors weren't doing anything about. I naively believed if I did something as drastic as admitting myself to the psych floor that besides helping me w/my anxiety and depression, the doctors would also try to sort out my many physical problems and symptoms (they didn't. they didn't even care to hear about the physical issues at all.). Out of despair, on the day before New Year's Eve, I went to the ER where they kept me one day in the pre-holding room for one day until a bed on the psych floor was available. (the pre-holding room/area was terrible in that I felt like a prisoner because it was a completely locked area, you had to ask a nurse to use the bathroom, and the holding room itself had nothing but a bed, a simple chair and a nightstand, and there was a camera in the corner of the room so they could watch you at all times, like in a prison cell or something. When I was first brought there, a cop used a metal detector wand on me, then the nurses took away my clothes and gave me scrubs to wear, and took all my personal belongings. On the flip side, at least in the holding area I could have a family member stay with me the entire time and the nurses brought me a DVD player and some movies to watch and the nurses were pretty kind there.
When I got brought to the psych floor, a cop escorted me which again made me feel like a prisoner, not a patient. On the psych floor at the hospital I went to, everybody got a private room which was nice but that's about the nicest part of it. The nurses (except for one day nurse who was very very nice) were disinterested and sometimes even condescending. The night nurses were the worst, they'd ignore patients who'd come up to their desk to ask for things or whatever, and just talk amongst themselves pointedly ignoring the waiting patient two feet away until they (the nurses) felt like acknowledging the patient. Phones were only available from about 8 a.m. until 9 p.m.. No cell phones allowed. I was so so SO very physically exhausted and needed rest but they'd make me go to pointless craft groups as they didn't want people in their rooms during the daytime. One TV in the common area that one patient hogged all day long but the nurses didn't care, I guess. They were assholes about how much food I did or didn't eat which was awful since I was so nauseated all the time that forcing down food was hard for me, plus I've never been a big eater anyway. At night they'd check on everybody every 15 minutes. They did let patients use hospital issued headphones to listen to the radio but the reception was so poor that those were fairly useless, but still it was nice idea. Beyond all this though, was the total lack of actual PSYCHIATRIC HELP I *didn't* get while there; the three days I was there I never saw an actual psychiatrist, just student doctors who'd ask a bunch of questions and that's it. Finally I had enough and didn't like the prison-like atmosphere and realized the help I thought I'd get wasn't going to happen. Spending New Year's Eve in a psych ward sucks.
No problems with other patients, though, thankfully. Either they were distant, much younger than I so the young ones all grouped up together, or just nice but not chatty or anything. I feel for those on here who experienced such negative interactions with other patients, that would make everything so much more scary. :( It helped that at the hospital I went to, they had separate wards for different levels of mental illness or severity.
Oh the other thing about where I was was that they'd let you wear your own clothes if those clothes didn't have strings, ties, belts, etc but you had to wash your own clothes in a laundry room on the floor. That was unexpected to me. lol
In summary, my experience had some negatives like the bitchy nurses and being made to feel like a prisoner in some ways, but mainly it was just neutral and pointless - and now I have it on my permanent medical history and so I get the "you're just an anxiety/depression patient" attitude a lot and psych meds pushed at me all the time, even when I (used to) go to the doctor about actual physical illnesses I also have which cause chronic pain. That attitude and the dismissiveness I get now is mainly why I regret ever admitting myself to that psych floor, as it seems going in only worked against me in the long run. I'd never do it again, certainly not voluntarily.
thanks for sharing....this sounds awful, worse then hell
I assume you mean in the USA... do you get charged for your stay even if you've been sectioned?
That was actually a really good description of what a lot of the staff can be like. I totally experienced that kind of apathy in some of the places I went to, and I'm sorry you had to go through that as well. I hope you have a better NYE this year. Once when I was inpatient and my eating disorder was active, I had a staff member tell me that he "didn't feel sorry for me" and that his body was his temple and that he'd never do that to it. Umm...I was in once and would never go in again as I found it to be an unpleasant experience and, more importantly, POINTLESS.
I voluntarily admitted myself about 5 years ago due to severe anxiety and depression, combined with a slew of physical health issues that were making my mental health deteriorate even further but that the medical doctors weren't doing anything about. I naively believed if I did something as drastic as admitting myself to the psych floor that besides helping me w/my anxiety and depression, the doctors would also try to sort out my many physical problems and symptoms (they didn't. they didn't even care to hear about the physical issues at all.). Out of despair, on the day before New Year's Eve, I went to the ER where they kept me one day in the pre-holding room for one day until a bed on the psych floor was available. (the pre-holding room/area was terrible in that I felt like a prisoner because it was a completely locked area, you had to ask a nurse to use the bathroom, and the holding room itself had nothing but a bed, a simple chair and a nightstand, and there was a camera in the corner of the room so they could watch you at all times, like in a prison cell or something. When I was first brought there, a cop used a metal detector wand on me, then the nurses took away my clothes and gave me scrubs to wear, and took all my personal belongings. On the flip side, at least in the holding area I could have a family member stay with me the entire time and the nurses brought me a DVD player and some movies to watch and the nurses were pretty kind there.
When I got brought to the psych floor, a cop escorted me which again made me feel like a prisoner, not a patient. On the psych floor at the hospital I went to, everybody got a private room which was nice but that's about the nicest part of it. The nurses (except for one day nurse who was very very nice) were disinterested and sometimes even condescending. The night nurses were the worst, they'd ignore patients who'd come up to their desk to ask for things or whatever, and just talk amongst themselves pointedly ignoring the waiting patient two feet away until they (the nurses) felt like acknowledging the patient. Phones were only available from about 8 a.m. until 9 p.m.. No cell phones allowed. I was so so SO very physically exhausted and needed rest but they'd make me go to pointless craft groups as they didn't want people in their rooms during the daytime. One TV in the common area that one patient hogged all day long but the nurses didn't care, I guess. They were assholes about how much food I did or didn't eat which was awful since I was so nauseated all the time that forcing down food was hard for me, plus I've never been a big eater anyway. At night they'd check on everybody every 15 minutes. They did let patients use hospital issued headphones to listen to the radio but the reception was so poor that those were fairly useless, but still it was nice idea. Beyond all this though, was the total lack of actual PSYCHIATRIC HELP I *didn't* get while there; the three days I was there I never saw an actual psychiatrist, just student doctors who'd ask a bunch of questions and that's it. Finally I had enough and didn't like the prison-like atmosphere and realized the help I thought I'd get wasn't going to happen. Spending New Year's Eve in a psych ward sucks.
No problems with other patients, though, thankfully. Either they were distant, much younger than I so the young ones all grouped up together, or just nice but not chatty or anything. I feel for those on here who experienced such negative interactions with other patients, that would make everything so much more scary. :( It helped that at the hospital I went to, they had separate wards for different levels of mental illness or severity.
Oh the other thing about where I was was that they'd let you wear your own clothes if those clothes didn't have strings, ties, belts, etc but you had to wash your own clothes in a laundry room on the floor. That was unexpected to me. lol
In summary, my experience had some negatives like the bitchy nurses and being made to feel like a prisoner in some ways, but mainly it was just neutral and pointless - and now I have it on my permanent medical history and so I get the "you're just an anxiety/depression patient" attitude a lot and psych meds pushed at me all the time, even when I (used to) go to the doctor about actual physical illnesses I also have which cause chronic pain. That attitude and the dismissiveness I get now is mainly why I regret ever admitting myself to that psych floor, as it seems going in only worked against me in the long run. I'd never do it again, certainly not voluntarily.
That's awful, I'm sorry you went through that. Psych wards do seem like really awful places, I can't believe that just a few months ago I thought they were completely fine. It's ironic you mention only being held against your will if you have a suicide plan though; at my last assessment I said I had a plan and the mental health worker just raised an eyebrow, asked what it was and wrote down that I had a plan but wouldn't tell her the method. Funny how different services can beI've been in 4 different psych wards, ranging from absolutely horrific (One Flew Over the Cuckoos Nest type) to not too bad.
My first 3 were when I was an adolescent (I'm now 54), so these might not be relevant because things have changed so much. The horrific one was a state mental hospital, and words can't describe how horrible that experience was. The nicer one was an open ward. I was there over 9 months, which would never happen now, with how insurance works now. My home life was so horrible that I was happy to be in the mental hospital. I met many friends there, and it gave me a different view of life that I couldn't have got any other way.
My most recent experience was a couple of months ago. I went to my primary care physician, who noticed my self harm cuts on my arm(some of which were pretty deep). He also knew I had some Suicide ideation (however I never mentioned that in that visit). He made an excuse to leave the room. A few minutes later 3 security guards came in the room and threatened to physically carry me to the emergency room because they were going to try to commit me to a mental hospital. In the emergency room they took my clothes, purse and phone from me. Put me in scrubs. I sat in that room for 8 hours, then was put in an ambulance and taken to a mental hospital.
During all this time I wasn't allowed to make a phone call. If I had shot someone in the head, I would have had more rights.
They kept me one completely sleepless night in this horrible place. I saw the psychiatrist first thing on the morning and he discharged me immediately. He knew that legally they had no right to keep me there.
Self harm that is clearly not suicidal is NOT a valid reason to put someone in a mental hospital. Nor is suicidal ideation. They can only put you in a mental hospital against your will if you have a suicide PLAN.
You are treated like a prisoner. You have no rights. The staff have no respect for you as a person. It's demeaning, demoralizing, and degrading.
I personally would rather be dead than ever go in one of these prisons again. Speaking for myself, if I do decide to ctb, I will make damn sure it is successful. I will never go back in one of those places where the basic dignity of life is taken from you.
Ironically, such psychiatric facilities would be "elite" in most Eastern European countries.absolutely horrific (One Flew Over the Cuckoos Nest type)