Luchs
kristallene Bergluft über verfallener Gruft
- Aug 20, 2019
- 528
If there is one thing I hate about myself it is that the more depressed and destroyed I am, the more productive I am. On my worst days I constantly have people telling me that it is great to see me so motivated and doing better. The reason for this is quite stupid, but I just start to heep up all of the work in order to torture myself, because it feels like I don't deserve freetime and breaks, like the otgers deserve it more than me. I come earlier, stay longer and volunteer for everything, I take barely any breaks, not even to eat. It is all so tiring, but in the moment I just want to burn myself out out of hate for myself.