W
watchingthewheels
Enlightened
- Jan 23, 2021
- 1,415
That made me realize how much of my identity and self-worth was invested in my last job, and the dangers of such. Companies love to say "we're family, here", but that's rarely true. (Well, unless you count the phrase "nobody !@#$%'s you over like family.")
And when you've invested time and energy into a job, and done a good job, only to be let go anyway (as opposed to being fired for justifiable reasons), it's soul-crushing. Like YOU failed, and you beat yourself up. Instead of being objective, it's easy to internalize it as failing as a human being. (Especially because you're no longer a human "doing".)
[I have no problem with work in and of itself; it's a part of life. "TANSTAAFL": "There ain't no such thing as a free lunch." Not talking about taking pride in accomplishments and achievements. I am referring to employment for others, and the hoops one jumps through to prove themselves as a human being, the politics, the sucking up, the shame of making an error and such, etc. Not to mention the unhealthy competition of dealing with backstabbers, the lazy, the jealous, gaslighting, etc. People whose personal motives don't integrate with the rest. You know, a day that ends in "Y". ]
Under better circumstances, I'd have been an independent contractor or self-employed. (Ideally, a musician or artist, but I gave up on being a "starving artist" long ago.) There are certain advantages of being an employee, though, regarding the risks business owners take. I don't mind the trade-off, in principle, and I treat my work as if I am working for myself, because I am, in essence, as well as them. It doesn't have to be either-or, win-lose. I believe in win-win, setting each other up to succeed, not fail. Unfortunately, that's not always reciprocated. And I take things to heart where others just take a purely pragmatic approach.
"Grow up", right? It's part of life, that's how it is. I've always been too idealistic for that, and expect people to "say what they mean, and mean what they say". That's not always the case, though, especially in a Machiavellian-styled workplace. I think I could respect it more if a company just said outright that this is business, and NOT a "family", instead of the two-faced corporate HR-speak. It would go a long way towards keeping a boundary between work and emotions, and pride in a job-well-done and putting food on the table vs. trying to please and prove one's self worth to cut-throats who just want to use and discard.
And when you've invested time and energy into a job, and done a good job, only to be let go anyway (as opposed to being fired for justifiable reasons), it's soul-crushing. Like YOU failed, and you beat yourself up. Instead of being objective, it's easy to internalize it as failing as a human being. (Especially because you're no longer a human "doing".)
[I have no problem with work in and of itself; it's a part of life. "TANSTAAFL": "There ain't no such thing as a free lunch." Not talking about taking pride in accomplishments and achievements. I am referring to employment for others, and the hoops one jumps through to prove themselves as a human being, the politics, the sucking up, the shame of making an error and such, etc. Not to mention the unhealthy competition of dealing with backstabbers, the lazy, the jealous, gaslighting, etc. People whose personal motives don't integrate with the rest. You know, a day that ends in "Y". ]
Under better circumstances, I'd have been an independent contractor or self-employed. (Ideally, a musician or artist, but I gave up on being a "starving artist" long ago.) There are certain advantages of being an employee, though, regarding the risks business owners take. I don't mind the trade-off, in principle, and I treat my work as if I am working for myself, because I am, in essence, as well as them. It doesn't have to be either-or, win-lose. I believe in win-win, setting each other up to succeed, not fail. Unfortunately, that's not always reciprocated. And I take things to heart where others just take a purely pragmatic approach.
"Grow up", right? It's part of life, that's how it is. I've always been too idealistic for that, and expect people to "say what they mean, and mean what they say". That's not always the case, though, especially in a Machiavellian-styled workplace. I think I could respect it more if a company just said outright that this is business, and NOT a "family", instead of the two-faced corporate HR-speak. It would go a long way towards keeping a boundary between work and emotions, and pride in a job-well-done and putting food on the table vs. trying to please and prove one's self worth to cut-throats who just want to use and discard.
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