Perhaps a goodbye perhaps not

[clawsofperdition]

I'm at a hotel. I've prepped my sn drink already. I stupidly forgot the antiemetic at home but this is my one chance at the moment. I brought propranolol by accident instead so i took 3 40mg pills hoping it would act as one. I also have 30 oexazepam pills ready but i'm scared to use them in case i throw up from both drinks. I don't want to just have a normal od then wake up at the loony bin. so in case i throw up from both sn drinks i guess i'll just go home, if able to? Maybe i'll be too sick but who knows. I'm scared, really scared. I'm sad. I'm alone. These past few days have felt so surreal and in a way it feels like i wont die which depresses me, especially since i forgot the most important part. I genuinely don't know how i forgot it, i had a list and everything. I was just so overwhelmed. Been planning this for a while now, two months at least. I wish assisted suicide was legal. It's awful to die alone at a hotel unaware of what will take place. i hope i die a clean peaceful death. I don't know what i'll do if this doesn't work.

 

[huntermellow]

good luck i hope it goes well :(

 

[EG1141]

good luck friend, I hope there's peace for you on the other side.

 

[FuneralCry]

I wish you all the best, whatever happens.

 

[clawsofperdition]

the taste is really bad
It took me a couple of minutes to drink everything i'm scared i'll puke
My body feels different in a bad way
Chest heavy everything feels awful
I think im going to throw up
Theres ringing in my ears i feel so weak

 

[null_blank]

Holding space for you.

 

[Gone soon]

I wish you all the best

 

[astr4]

i hope that you are able to find some peace.

 

[mfjajs]

Goodbye. Peace for you.

How you feeling

 

[CantDoIt]

Everything is gonna be okay!!

 

[VeryShy]

Whatever happens I wish you complete freedom from this world's suffering.

 

[Cress]

I'm at a hotel. I've prepped my sn drink already. I stupidly forgot the antiemetic at home but this is my one chance at the moment. I brought propranolol by accident instead so i took 3 40mg pills hoping it would act as one. I also have 30 oexazepam pills ready but i'm scared to use them in case i throw up from both drinks. I don't want to just have a normal od then wake up at the loony bin. so in case i throw up from both sn drinks i guess i'll just go home, if able to? Maybe i'll be too sick but who knows. I'm scared, really scared. I'm sad. I'm alone. These past few days have felt so surreal and in a way it feels like i wont die which depresses me, especially since i forgot the most important part. I genuinely don't know how i forgot it, i had a list and everything. I was just so overwhelmed. Been planning this for a while now, two months at least. I wish assisted suicide was legal. It's awful to die alone at a hotel unaware of what will take place. i hope i die a clean peaceful death. I don't know what i'll do if this doesn't work.

There's nothing wrong with postponing things. The antiemetic is a huge deal. You're likely to just throw up from the sn and struggle to drink the second one never mind the 30 oexazepam pills. You're greatly underestimating the human body it's very good at detecting when you've swallowed something toxic.

 

[Aprilfarewell4]

They might have called services, they seemed very scared and uncomfortable. If they didn't I hope they lost consciousness quickly and did not suffer.

 

[Unknown21]

I hope you found peace. R.I.P.

 

[CantDoIt]

Rest in peace! Hope the other side is awesome.