Venting peoples doubtful responses

[urwelcomelb]

Something I always notice when I try to reach out for help in real life is that no one ever believes I'm going to ACTUALLY kill myself. They'll feel bad for me, comfort me with the normal responses "oh that's terrible you feel that way, you should get help, do this, do that, there's no reason to kill yourself, things get better", and I'm sure it's well intentioned, but I can always tell they don't think I'll act on my thoughts and that I'm just bluffing. I've had two people take me seriously and genuinely try to help, ever.
It really just makes me want to ctb more as some spiteful way to prove them wrong. Like, if they aren't gonna believe me, might as well actually do it so they realize I wasn't just bluffing. People don't take me seriously because I don't have a plan yet, nevermind planning something like this takes time and effort, nevermind there have been countless times I literally almost grabbed a knife and stabbed myself, nevermind I'm making a plan as we speak.
Sometimes I'm tempted to try parasuicide first and see how that goes? I wonder if I mistake my need to be taken seriously and seen as a human being with feelings is influencing me to attempt suicide, and that just doing a parasuicide attempt would accomplish that without also taking away my life. I really mean it when I say dying is a last resort, I've tried everything else except parasuicide, so maybe I'll consider it.

 

[𝗟𝗼𝗻𝗲𝗹𝘆]

Sometimes I feel like it's not that people don't believe but that they don't care. They care only when it's too late. They care not for someone losing their life but for them losing that person out of selfish reasons. They feel bad for themselves.

 

[UKscotty]

People don't care.

I never understand why people insist on telling people about their CTB thoughts and plans.

Once they know they will see us as a burden and a liability to get rid of quick.

If someone tells people it's probably just attention seeking, as I can't get my head around any other reason.

 

[SoulofSteel]

People don't give a shit until it's too late, they may also think that we're just fishing for attention for the hell of it.

 

[urwelcomelb]

People don't care.

I never understand why people insist on telling people about their CTB thoughts and plans.

Once they know they will see us as a burden and a liability to get rid of quick.

If someone tells people it's probably just attention seeking, as I can't get my head around any other reason.

I tell people because I'm genuinely trying to seek help. People who tell others about their suicidal thoughts are not attention seekers, and its pretty terrible to insinuate people who are actually struggling are just seeking some kind of attention. You are literally just doing the exact thing I complained about in my post, not taking others suicidal thoughts seriously.

 

[UKscotty]

I tell people because I'm genuinely trying to seek help. People who tell others about their suicidal thoughts are not attention seekers, and its pretty terrible to insinuate people who are actually struggling are just seeking some kind of attention. You are literally just doing the exact thing I complained about in my post, not taking others suicidal thoughts seriously.

People don't care and can't help though is my point.

What do you expect someone to do?

If you want help you are in wrong part of the forum, you should try the recovery section.

 

[Forever Sleep]

I expect part of it depends on how often you have told them. It shouldn't be this way but it's a bit like the story 'The Boy Who Cried Wolf.' People tend to become numb to hearing things- even deeply serious things if they hear them too often. Plus- sorry to say it but logically- if you keep telling someone you are going to do it over a period of time but don't- they probably just assume you won't this time either- as you didn't before. Not that I'm advocating for action. The sad thing is of course that it disregards how you feel and that you may in fact actually be declining further.

It is so hard though. Honestly, I have a friend who is struggling. Who has reason to struggle but- there can come a time when you just don't know what more you can say. They have been saying things are getting worse now for years. That's not to say that isn't their experience but what do I say in return? 'I feel even more sorry for you than last time'?

If it's practical things you need from people- perhaps ask for that outright. You'd hope you'd still get some sympathy but honestly- and sadly- people do get fed up with giving out pity. My Dad said to me- 'People will only listen to your problems for so long and then, they'll become bored.' It's sad but true I'm afraid. I'm sorry. It's pretty lonely feeling like this.