LetMeBeSad

LetMeBeSad

Student
Sep 21, 2023
162
I was assaulted by my grandfather at least 6 times between 6 and 13. I feel like I've been handed a death sentence by one of the men that was supposed to teach me how to live
 
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AngelTears

AngelTears

Last Days
Jun 10, 2023
63
Drowning myself with drugs...
Drowning myself with drugs...
I was assaulted by my grandfather at least 6 times between 6 and 13. I feel like I've been handed a death sentence by one of the men that was supposed to teach me how to live
I hate that the people that should have helped us be better people just ruined the fuck out of us... I am so sory... nobody deserves this.
 
Lookingtoflyfree

Lookingtoflyfree

Specialist
Jan 11, 2024
326
I had it buried for a long time but then the Brent Kavanaugh Supreme Court hearings unearthed it and just reminded me how number I was for years after it happened. Then I was reminded. Because it was my first sexual experience it is hard not to see how it scared me off of any relationships. I've had them but none have lasted. Too much trauma.

He'll never see justice and just thought I was there to be used and that I 'wanted' it - the thing I didn't consent to. So an object.
 
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loslassen

loslassen

call me jvne
Dec 8, 2023
163
I went through SA three times as a kid.
Still think of that a lot.
It will sound disgusting but for some time I made myself believe I liked it. I still can't deal with the fact that the person responsible was not punished.
I don't think I'll ever heal from it since it happened when I was a child(6)… and another older child did it. a person who's still very present in my life and can't seem to want or be able to get away from. I've confessed it to them after many years of it burdening me and they apologized, but I've never reached out professionally. Don't know how to cope, ignore it day to day, haunts me every few weeks or months. It made me hypersexual since a young age but now I have a very understanding partner, with whom I've been able to heal about my sexual trauma. Something that will always hurt me though is that I'll never have a first time, consensual, exchange of sexual affection.
 
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wait.what

wait.what

no really, what?
Aug 14, 2020
987
I've spent a lot of my life drunk. I can't really recommend it.
 
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Bernie__

Member
Jan 27, 2024
7
ngl have never been able to cope, never had a friend in my life, just abused by my parents my entire life, so I've just got to the point of giving this life up, tried suicide 100s of times, never gets better, suicidal since I was 9, so sick of being alive, constantly dealing with flashbacks and nightmares and the total unending abuse and neglect from my mother is just amazing, I just wish I had a way of killing myself that'd actually work
 
og.

og.

im gonna kill myself
Oct 19, 2021
56
this might sound edgy but sometimes i feel like revenge is the only way to get over it but idk anymore
 
thinvy

thinvy

Woefully Yours, Luka
Aug 7, 2023
210
90% of the time, I forget it happened ✌️✌️✌️✌️

not in a fun "oh it's been so long and I've processed this trauma and it no longer bothers me" way, nah. I just violently disassociate and/or get stoned about it lol

the other 10% of the time? I don't. I go into fits of rage, despair, fear. I get drunk sometimes to feel something else. I get high. I scream into the void (or into my phone). I read/write/draw porn where I'm in control of what's going on.

the healthiest things I suprisingly did though? stopped thinking of sex as transactional and started thinking of it as a fun activity (very hard but worth it). Bought myself sex toys to get comfier with my own body outside of contexts where I'm with someone else (body shame was a part of my trauma, this one was incredibly difficult). Big big healing part was getting the fuck away from reminders of my offenders. I'm not anywhere near any of the places where I was touched. I haven't been back to the one apartment complex at all. I'm never going back to the one town if I can help it. I'm over a thousand of miles away from where most of it happened, and the worst offender has moved away from my hometown (as have I) and has moved like 8 states away from our home state, and away from my new state.
 
L

lostmind38

Member
Mar 1, 2024
46
I don't really... Sometimes I have good days when the lid stays shut. Minor things will trigger me and the night terrors, the flashbacks start. It will always stay with me.