Venting People (IRL) are so fucking delusional

[TAW122]

Argh, people (IRL) around me are SO fucking delusional! Especially the people who interact with me on a regular basis and see me day to day! I've long given up trying to reason with these blabbering idiots who don't know my situation worth a goddamn shit and decide to be sanctimonious and then if I call them out on it, they call me negative or decide to beat me down verbally! Really? Fucking hell, it isn't just family, acquaintances, but even goddamn strangers too! I'll give a few scenario examples of this bullshit.

Scenario #1:
My dad still believes that I'm some super capable person of being able to get a good career. Seriously, I could barely even get a fucking job, let alone keep it. Thinking about slaving away for decades until retirement (if there is even retirement) makes me just want to die even more, especially long hours and overtime (being a regular thing nowadays). Oh and let's not kid ourselves about health insurance and shit (but that's another story).

Furthermore, some of the bullshit that he's said are: you failed in life (poor social life, no career, not being able to keep up with the rest of my peers at my age) because you didn't read enough books (and a plethora of bullshit, arbitrary reasons), you played too many vidya games while growing up. Really?? Fuck outta here with that shit! He's just guilt tripping me and blaming me for my setbacks and failures in life. I mean sure, there are some of them that are my own fault, I'll admit, but really there is a lot that is out of my control.

Scenario #2:
People who are around me (not just present day but throughout my life), such as strangers and acquaintances keep believing that I will be successful socially, financially, and in life. Fucking batshit delusional people, ugh! I can't even begin to reason or wrap my head around such baseless claims without any concrete evidence. Sure, I get they want to encourage me, but they fail (and continue to fail) to see that my situation is bleak. Of course, if I didn't improve enough, they resort to guilt tripping, shaming, belittling my situation, or even say that I didn't want to improve or didn't try hard enough.

As of now, I know I'm fucked financially (in the long term) as the best I'll get is likely just wage slaving a low paying job to get by (while having a mountain of student loan debt to pay off and what not), living a cheap and low quality of life; and socially, forget even having a social circle, friends, let alone a girlfriend (not that I want one - but it's fucking sad that even I don't have that capability if I so choose to). Yet people are still so braindead and batshit delusional that they spew platitudes without understanding my situation.

Scenario #3:
Other situations are where I got burned by other people (mean people or jerks) and others usually just try to play it off or dismiss my situation and brush me off, yet they seem to want to push their agenda on me. It's not just a few individuals but many others. Fuck it, it's rarely about my interests and my desires. It's about how they can flaunt their moral superiority dick length and how goody of a two shoes they can fucking be. Of course, when confronted they resort to nasty attacks and more character assassinations.

Why is this the case? Can't they just accept that my situation sucks and be fucking honest?! Like what the fuck is wrong with them?! I just want people to be fucking honest, don't spew bullshit, don't give false hope, and just be realistic about shit. Why is it so fucking hard to do that?? Why can't people just tell me like "look @thrw_a_way1221221, it's pretty hopeless, don't waste your time and effort" or "thrw_a_way1221221, you know, just do what you want (even though I don't agree with you)" and then fuck off and leave me be? Just accept my decision and prerogative (even if you don't agree) instead of trying to shame me into compliance, insist that I keep trying (for bullshit and for nothing gained, then blame me for being asshole). But no, with my woes and what not, it's all delusions, guilt trips, false hope, platitudes, and shame and guilt (or worse threats of punishment). God fucking damn it, the world's mad.

Maybe some of you might have experienced the same things or similar scenarios that you might be able to give some input on this.

 

[Help_Me]

Right here with you, mate ! Just a few scenarios of my latest week :

1. My friend told me I should start living when I was venting about him getting everything in his life for doing nothing. Well thanks, at least I am doing much more than parking my ass on the sofa everyday. I don't want to sound too selfish, but I am doing much more than everyone else from my society circle. I was trying to get job for 1-2 years (nothing serious, just a junior vacancy at IT company with pretty regular generic salary). It took me about 1-2 years of struggling, man ! And do you know how others get their jobs ?? Well, they are always welcome after 2,3 interviews. I am doing all the same. I can provide dozens of examples from other spheres of life if you want.

2. My other friend is going to face the divorce in a few months probably. He was alone for some time since his wife broke thru family. So, the fun part : you guys probably heard of that garbage application called "tinder" ? You know, it's like popular Pokemon go : you install this dating service on phone and literally start searching for monsters in your area. So, he did it and 15 minutes after some random girl messaged him. And you know what ? She is absolutely normal ! Not a whore, just a normal person with good interests. They now meet everyday with each other and going to be happy together. Wow, he literally did nothing, just nothing. This was pure luck. And guess what ? He now behaves like a pro-lifer ! He thinks this method should work for everyone, including me... Damn sh*t, people around me are so delusional.(((( Their stupidity and ignorance makes me angry, mate.

 

[TAW122]

Right here with you, mate ! Just a few scenarios of my latest week :

1. My friend told me I should start living when I was venting about him getting everything in his life for doing nothing. Well thanks, at least I am doing much more than parking my ass on the sofa everyday. I don't want to sound too selfish, but I am doing much more than everyone else from my society circle. I was trying to get job for 1-2 years (nothing serious, just a junior vacancy at IT company with pretty regular generic salary). It took me about 1-2 years of struggling, man ! And do you know how others get their jobs ?? Well, they are always welcome after 2,3 interviews. I am doing all the same. I can provide dozens of examples from other spheres of life if you want.

2. My other friend is going to face the divorce in a few months probably. He was alone for some time since his wife broke thru family. So, the fun part : you guys probably heard of that garbage application called "tinder" ? You know, it's like popular Pokemon go : you install this dating service on phone and literally start searching for monsters in your area. So, he did it and 15 minutes after some random girl messaged him. And you know what ? She is absolutely normal ! Not a whore, just a normal person with good interests. They now meet everyday with each other and going to be happy together. Wow, he literally did nothing, just nothing. This was pure luck. And guess what ? He now behaves like a pro-lifer ! He thinks this method should work for everyone, including me... Damn sh*t, people around me are so delusional.(((( Their stupidity and ignorance makes me angry, mate.

For the first one, yeah I can relate to it. Also, there are people who don't know the current market and keep parroting off things like "dude IT (Information Technology) is hot field hurr durr, they are like looking for people everywhere" bullshit like that. I'm so tired of hearing them say that and I just stopped trying to correct people or argue with them on that point.

The other one, ugh, I hate those pretentious pro-lifers who push their agenda on others. I believe they commit a variant of the post hoc ergo propter hoc fallacy with their view and arguments. I mean, good for him and he can speak for himself, because not everyone's situation is the same nor is every working solution for one person going to work on everyone else. Goddamn, I too hate ignorant people like that.

Anyways, I have pretty much given up hope on finding a close friend let alone a girlfriend or a relationship, and just accepted that I'm going to die a virgin or die alone. I've also accepted that I'm likely going to ctb rather than slave away for decades on a menial job just to survive. I tell myself that when it gets too much, I'll just ctb and thus I've pretty much concluded my life in my 20's already.

 

[okyeah]

The way society is held up is through delusion. I learned my place in the social hierarchy early in life and it is not going to change in the real world. I can slave at a job but it won't change my situation. Any relationship past 30 will be through desperation and not any real love. I've just accepted my fate, unlike most people in this world, and will be ending my life.

 

[Xerxes]

IT is a hot field, but the pay is crappy right now. Especially entry-level jobs in IT.

 

[MAIO]

IT is a hot field, but the pay is crappy right now. Especially entry-level jobs in IT.

In America medical field is always the best paying field

 

[TAW122]

In America medical field is always the best paying field

This is due to big pharma, privately owned healthcare facilities that jack up the prices of health care, and of course the evil psychiatric institution that loves to diagnose and label people (nowadays, you get a diagnoses for even the most ridiculous things that aren't really an illness). I resent the fact that I have an older sister who is doing residency to become a psychiatrist and I stay the hell away from her.

 

[Idorus]

Any relationship past 30 will be through desperation and not any real love

Before 30 it's procreation only, true love has nothing to do with that either. When brutal life kicks in there's nothing left but ashes.

 

[TAW122]

Before 30 it's procreation only, true love has nothing to do with that either. When brutal life kicks in there's nothing left but ashes.

Since I'm 28, I guess after 30 it means my life will just get worse and it would be even more the reason to ctb?

 

[Meeseeks]

This is a bit of an aside but "moral superiority dick length" made me laugh. That's a great fucking line. Thank you for that.

And fuck this society. I was cheering the Dow Jones plummeting today. Pissed it rebounded.

 

[Idorus]

Since I'm 28, I guess after 30 it means my life will just get worse and it would be even more the reason to ctb?

Ah no srry that's not what I meant although life def. becomes worse with aging. I was saying it's just a matter of little years before the bubble of love bursts at procreation age.

 

[Morbid Cam]

You are so right, people dont want to believe bad things can happen to them and want to believe that every bad thing that happens to you and when things dont work out for you then it's your fault.It especially sucks when you're the victim of life's BS because then everyone wants to point the finger at you. I keep trying and trying to better my life and follow my dreams but things never work out for me and everytime I get a disappointment someone comes and rubs salt in the wound by telling me that Its because I'm lazy or that I need to find something else (which I dont really know how to do because I know what I like and dont like and I've been passionate about my dream since I was a young child) it's just so frustrating.

 

[Life sucks]

People are delusional and toxic. They lie because they want to save themselves from cognitive dissonance.

 

[MsM3talGamer]

Since I'm 28, I guess after 30 it means my life will just get worse and it would be even more the reason to ctb?

Not that it applies to everyone, but after 30 my life literally has gone to hell. It was horrendous before, but after 30 my health problems began and the dating pool decreased exponentially.

The shitheads who regurgigate the meaningless platitude "things get better" ad nauseum don't have a fucking clue. They have life on easy mode, unlike us.

 

[TAW122]

Not that it applies to everyone, but after 30 my life literally has gone to hell. It was horrendous before, but after 30 my health problems began and the dating pool decreased exponentially.

The shitheads who regurgigate the meaningless platitude "things get better" ad nauseum don't have a fucking clue. They have life on easy mode, unlike us.

Exactly, and as an Asian American male, if I was into dating, I could have very well ended up in the same situation that Wilkes McDermid (a popular British food blogger who did a study on why Asian males in the Western world couldn't end up dating caucasian women or even women of other races) ended up and committed suicide. Personally, I don't have any interest in dating and relationships, but it does make me really sad that if I were ever interested, I would never be able to succeed. Therefore, I've pretty much given up on the dating shit around age 17-18 since it was bullshit. If there was anything that I've benefited from doing so, it would be to avoid breakups, relationship drama, and shit that most normie couples go through.

 

[MsM3talGamer]

Exactly, and as an Asian American male, if I was into dating, I could have very well ended up in the same situation that Wilkes McDermid (a popular British food blogger who did a study on why Asian males in the Western world couldn't end up dating caucasian women or even women of other races) ended up and committed suicide. Personally, I don't have any interest in dating and relationships, but it does make me really sad that if I were ever interested, I would never be able to succeed. Therefore, I've pretty much given up on the dating shit around age 17-18 since it was bullshit. If there was anything that I've benefited from doing so, it would be to avoid breakups, relationship drama, and shit that most normie couples go through.

I dated a bit in the past but it all ended in disaster. I'm not cut out for this world and can't even imagine being a normie. I strongly believe that my abusive parents changed how my brain functions. Plus, I have serious attachment issues. I had no idea that Asian American males had so much trouble on the dating scene.

 

[TAW122]

I dated a bit in the past but it all ended in disaster. I'm not cut out for this world and can't even imagine being a normie. I strongly believe that my abusive parents changed how my brain functions. Plus, I have serious attachment issues. I had no idea that Asian American males had so much trouble on the dating scene.

Yeah, we actually suffer in silence when it comes to social issues such as racism, sexism, the dating world, and other injustices. Plus the positive stereotypes such as oh s/he is Asian so s/he must be a doctor, lawyer, scientist, (other professional field), good at math, really smart, etc. it's just really insulting and inaccurate. Also, it paints a really negative image of Asian Americans.

We Asian Americans are the minority of the minority (excluding Native Americans and some other people) and a lot of people get away with racist jokes, inaccurate stereotypes, Asian males are emasculated in the media, and much more. Therefore, no one really desires to date us, barring a few rare exceptions. Furthermore, the media and society (at least in the US and in the Western world) knows that we don't really go to the media for injustices, or fight back, or are easy targets so more often than not, we are looked down as victims and just walking knowledge banks. Of course, there are successful Asian males out there, but those are the exceptions rather than the norm.

Sometimes I'd just think that one day Asian Americans will stand up for themselves a bit more as the next generation of Asian Americans grows up and what not. Personally, I'm 2nd generation Asian American so I am more aware of such issues and what not.

 

[azucaramargo]

Argh, people (IRL) around me are SO fucking delusional! Especially the people who interact with me on a regular basis and see me day to day! I've long given up trying to reason with these blabbering idiots who don't know my situation worth a goddamn shit and decide to be sanctimonious and then if I call them out on it, they call me negative or decide to beat me down verbally! Really? Fucking hell, it isn't just family, acquaintances, but even goddamn strangers too! I'll give a few scenario examples of this bullshit.

Scenario #1:
My dad still believes that I'm some super capable person of being able to get a good career. Seriously, I could barely even get a fucking job, let alone keep it. Thinking about slaving away for decades until retirement (if there is even retirement) makes me just want to die even more, especially long hours and overtime (being a regular thing nowadays). Oh and let's not kid ourselves about health insurance and shit (but that's another story).

Furthermore, some of the bullshit that he's said are: you failed in life (poor social life, no career, not being able to keep up with the rest of my peers at my age) because you didn't read enough books (and a plethora of bullshit, arbitrary reasons), you played too many vidya games while growing up. Really?? Fuck outta here with that shit! He's just guilt tripping me and blaming me for my setbacks and failures in life. I mean sure, there are some of them that are my own fault, I'll admit, but really there is a lot that is out of my control.

Scenario #2:
People who are around me (not just present day but throughout my life), such as strangers and acquaintances keep believing that I will be successful socially, financially, and in life. Fucking batshit delusional people, ugh! I can't even begin to reason or wrap my head around such baseless claims without any concrete evidence. Sure, I get they want to encourage me, but they fail (and continue to fail) to see that my situation is bleak. Of course, if I didn't improve enough, they resort to guilt tripping, shaming, belittling my situation, or even say that I didn't want to improve or didn't try hard enough.

As of now, I know I'm fucked financially (in the long term) as the best I'll get is likely just wage slaving a low paying job to get by (while having a mountain of student loan debt to pay off and what not), living a cheap and low quality of life; and socially, forget even having a social circle, friends, let alone a girlfriend (not that I want one - but it's fucking sad that even I don't have that capability if I so choose to). Yet people are still so braindead and batshit delusional that they spew platitudes without understanding my situation.

Scenario #3:
Other situations are where I got burned by other people (mean people or jerks) and others usually just try to play it off or dismiss my situation and brush me off, yet they seem to want to push their agenda on me. It's not just a few individuals but many others. Fuck it, it's rarely about my interests and my desires. It's about how they can flaunt their moral superiority dick length and how goody of a two shoes they can fucking be. Of course, when confronted they resort to nasty attacks and more character assassinations.

Why is this the case? Can't they just accept that my situation sucks and be fucking honest?! Like what the fuck is wrong with them?! I just want people to be fucking honest, don't spew bullshit, don't give false hope, and just be realistic about shit. Why is it so fucking hard to do that?? Why can't people just tell me like "look @thrw_a_way1221221, it's pretty hopeless, don't waste your time and effort" or "thrw_a_way1221221, you know, just do what you want (even though I don't agree with you)" and then fuck off and leave me be? Just accept my decision and prerogative (even if you don't agree) instead of trying to shame me into compliance, insist that I keep trying (for bullshit and for nothing gained, then blame me for being asshole). But no, with my woes and what not, it's all delusions, guilt trips, false hope, platitudes, and shame and guilt (or worse threats of punishment). God fucking damn it, the world's mad.

Maybe some of you might have experienced the same things or similar scenarios that you might be able to give some input on this.

I wish people were telling me all the time how great I was! I would love that kind of reassurance/encouragement. Kind of crappy of your dad to list things you could've done better. Yeah, we all could've done things better. He was probably just thinking of his own regrets in life and projecting them onto you.

I really don't understand scenario #3. Do you mean that people OTHER than the ones who burned you try to brush it off? Or, do you mean that the people who actually burned you brush it off?

 

[TAW122]

Late post here, my thread got buried but I'll respond to scenario #3 with an example.

Example:
A few months ago, I talked with another person IRL (not super close but does see me oftenly) on the topic of making friends and maintaining friends. So I started off talking about how I could not make any friends, that people just don't want to befriend me, I've become the 3rd wheel, people don't reciprocate contact, nor invite me to hangout with them. The person IRL kept trying to change my mind, going under the premise that there is always someone out there that will friend me (which I know is bullshit because if it hadn't happened before it is very unlikely, plus given my circumstances as an 28M Asian American with Aspergers (which fucks me over a lot as it hinders my ability to read social cues and act accordingly) and shitty social skills, I'm pretty much fucked). The person kept going back and forth with false promises, bad premises, and whenever I tried to reason out and say that he is wrong, she just gets angry and stuff and keeps trying to guilt me, encourage me to keep trying (despite all the failures), basically ignoring what I've just said. She then resorts to saying I'm just being pessimistic and keeps going through the same fucking circular reasoning and retorts that she has, like a vicious cycle.

Ultimately, I said, well I have a limit and I am also setting boundaries because after trying x amount of time and y effort, I've reached my limit and I am not going to keep trying to pursue something that isn't likely to give good returns. She hasn't come up with any logical response but rather just resorted to emotional responses and what not. (In before anyone says I can't reason with women or women are more emotional than men, etc. it's not about that -- men and other people other than her have also done the same shit time and time again.) She then latches on to false promises and premises of which she cannot prove true or false, and is subjective. God damn it, just fucking pisses me off when I am reminded of that situation. In this scenario, all I want is for her to be fucking honest. Just consider my situation and if it is unlikely that I will succeed or so, just call it as it is. Don't fucking tell me that there is hope or try to lie to me to encourage me (being realistic isn't pessimistic). If she had just said "TAW122, yeah I don't think it would work.", "While I don't agree with you, I won't insist, just do what you want to do." or something along those lines, I'd be ok. I just don't understand why she or most other people must fucking lie or set me up for disappointment.