definitely relate. sometimes i get angry at my parents, sometimes i get angry at their parents, overall im just angry that anyone could ever think having a child would fix their problems. it just causes more problems. im so glad ive realised this and will never have children if im alive for that long. ive thought about, if i ever get over my suicidal thoughts, adopting to help take a kid out of a horrible situation, but i realise i wouldnt be able to give them much of a better situation if im honest.
studied larkin in college! definitely an interesting man, very odd relationship with himself, his parents, the women in his life. my favourite poem of his has to be Myxomatosis! about the death of a rabbit as it dies, but being unable to understand its situation, the disease is anthropomorphised into a beast of its own.
Caught in the center of a soundless field
While hot inexplicable hours go by
What trap is this? Where were its teeth concealed?
You seem to ask.
I make a sharp reply,
Then clean my stick. I'm glad I can't explain
Just in what jaws you were to suppurate:
You may have thought things would come right again
If you could only keep quite still and wait.
in a similar vein, he wrote one about the death of a hedgehod he's previously been feeding, by running it over with a lawnmower
The mower stalled, twice; kneeling, I found
A hedgehog jammed up against the blades,
Killed. It had been in the long grass.
I had seen it before, and even fed it, once.
Now I had mauled its unobtrusive world
Unmendably. Burial was no help:
Next morning I got up and it did not.
The first day after a death, the new absence
Is always the same; we should be careful
Of each other, we should be kind
While there is still time.
idk, i just think these two poems in particular are beautiful, not a fan of the man himself, but he definitely knew how to write. the one that personally resonates with me the most from his collection 'The Less Deceived' has to be
Deceptions, originally named the same as the anthology! CW for that though, as it is about a womans rape. the statement about being 'ruined' before hand destroys me;
Of course I was drugged, and so heavily I did not regain
consciousness until the next morning. I was horrified to
discover that I had been ruined, and for some days I was inconsolable,
and cried like a child to be killed or sent back to my aunt
that isnt even the poem, but this poem was definitely hard to cover in class when we went through it, beautiful and heartbreaking, 'I would not dare/Console you if I could' always hit me the hardest.
Church Going is another beautiful one, though not as dark :)
sorry for the big Larkin dump! i know you only cared about that specific poem, but Larkin's other work is certainly worth exploring if you like nihilistic, tragic poetry, i think you'd like 'Wires', 'Poetry of Departures', 'Wants', and 'Next, Please', if that is the style of poetry youre into, sorry again for the giant dump !!!