Paperwork and my mother saying something inappropriate

[YAYorNAY]

We had to do a lot of paperwork because of me.
i had to get notes from doctors but for some reason that wasn't enough (even though thats all what they Originally asked for) and had to get a million other things.
my mother got Reeeaaaallly frustrated with all this which is understandable.
but recently she said something about the lady from the benefits office that really bugged me

"I Hope she has a kid with mental issues that are worse than yours so she can see how hard it is!"

and I was like "Jesus Christ mom NO!"
and then there was this whole conversation about how she only wants the woman to suffer and not her child, but if the kid is really in such a bad mental state it will probably suffer as well
i mean my mother has been trying to become a better person and parent, wich I really appreciate but sometime she says stuff like that and I'm not sure what to think

 

[Angst Filled Fuck Up]

Awful of her to say. If I could give one piece of advice, it would be to look at what she does rather than what she says. If she's generally supportive and helps you out a lot, try to focus on that. Talk is cheap, and much of the older generation isn't well equipped to be sensitive to their kids conversationally because these things never came up in their own lives. So as a result we're dealing with a lot of stuff that might seem silly to older people.

Doesn't excuse what she said of course, but it does seem like she's at the end of her rope a little. Hope you two can work through it.

 

[That's Not Me]

Things that hurt often happen out of love, but sometimes they only happen because other people need to have some release valve. Sometimes people feel entitled to say something just because they've done something nice, but doing something nice doesn't justify saying something that they know can hurt. It is very kind of you to try to look from your mother's side, but don't neglect your own feelings. If I had to give you advice, I would probably say the same as the user above commented. Try to look on the bright side of the things your mother does, but whenever you realize that you are stifling your own feelings to make her happy, try to talk to someone and put it out there. You also need an release valve. You probably already know by this time, but this forum is full of people who can listen to you, including me. Feel free to message me if you want.